Thrive Parenting

Children are human, just like us. They feel things strongly, just like we do. Their feelings matter, just like ours. The thing is, though, things that seem minor to us can feel overwhelming or heartbreaking to them. And those feelings matter. They can’t be reasoned away or minimized away or joked away. Children need to be seen and heard and understood, just like we do.

Children don’t ‘mis’behave. They behave, either positively or negatively, to communicate.

Small children communicate through their behavior because that is the only method of communication they have. Even when they become verbal, though, they still aren’t able to articulate big feelings and subtle problems well verbally, so as parents it’s our role to ‘listen between the lines’ of our children’s behavior to discern the need being communicated.

Meeting the underlying needs being communicated through behavior, even (or especially) challenging behaviors, opens the door to cooperation and offers opportunities to work with our children on better ways to communicate their needs and on setting and maintaining healthy boundaries for both us and them.

Remember, setting boundaries is not about ‘mis’behavior. It’s about ‘guiding’ behavior, and guidance is something we provide through everyday interactions with our children.

The solution to every parenting problem starts with nine little words:

'I'm here.'
'I hear you.'
'How can I help?'

When needs are met through connection, hearts are opened to gentle, respectful, compassionate communication, guidance, and cooperation.
-L.R.Knost

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📚Peaceful Parenting Resources: http://t.co/T8goym3P6Z 📚
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www.LRKnost.com

Fighting a rare, incurable cancer, but I'm still here!💞 L.R.

When we stop to 'read between the lines' of our children's behavior, we can tune into their hearts, their hurts, their confusion, their frustration, their needs. That’s how we connect with our little humans to guide and help and heal them instead of simply correcting their behavior.

Always let L.O.V.E. be your guide:
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Listen - “I hear you.”
Observe - “I see you.”
Validate - “I accept you.”
Empathize - “I understand you.”
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Then when the need behind the behavior is met, when they feel seen and heard and understood, you can work together to come up with better ways of expressing their needs in the future. But remember, growing up is a process and it takes a LOT of practice. They won’t get it right every time. They may not even get it right most of the time. But over time you’ll see them grow more and more confident and capable of understanding and expressing their needs verbally and relationally. They won’t ever be perfect, though, and that’s okay. We aren’t, either.💞
-L.R.Knost

📷 Positive Parenting: Toddlers and Beyond Dance with me in the Heart 💞

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📚Peaceful Parenting Resources: http://t.co/T8goym3P6Z 📚
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www.LRKnost.com

Fighting a rare, incurable cancer, but I'm still here!💞 L.R.

100 non-boring questions to ask your child instead of 'How was your day?' That question never works on kids anyway. Here are the best questions that will actually foster a fun conversation with your child.

😂🙈

I love asking children to say ‘yet’ after they say they can’t do something. It’s supportive (it communicates that they will be able to soon), realistic and accepting of where they are at now and it encourages them to keep trying, practicing and learning until they CAN.

Adults can reframe children’s challenging behavior in a way that strengthens the relationship.

Sketchnote by

Give yourself permission to...

Sketchnote via Kristin Wiens

Something to keep in mind over the holidays

Being too compliant can be problematic …… teaching our children to think for themselves can never be overrated……

Here’s to a great year