Australian Cauda Equina Syndrome Community

I just drank 2 teaspoons of Epsom Salts, lets see what happens....

Wow, I can't believe it has been over 2 years since I last posted on here. I had one message in those 2 years, from someone asking if the page had shut down, since nothing had been posted in so long. I was able to help that person in the only way I know how, by sharing my personal experience and knowledge. I have heard from many of you over the years, we have had conversations, and then you have gone on your journeys. I hope you are doing well!

I didn't post for a long time, because nothing really changed. I often think about posting, but then wonder what could I post, that I haven't posted before? Well I had a very exciting development recently, nothing world changing, but it sure changed my world. But just briefly, before that... I recently realised that I had past the anniversary of my CES surgery in June, all of 16 years ago. I used to acknowledge this day every year, in the early years, with something momentous, like rock climbing, canyoning, skiing, breakdancing.... something I hadn't done before..... now, it just passes by without me noticing..... I guess it has just been assimilated into a part of my everyday. And everyday is hard, every day has a reminder, hell every hour, most minutes, have some kind of reminder.... but hey, you just gotta keep ploughing on. And take every small victory, as a victory. One of the every day things I struggle with is wearing jeans. So much so, that I never do, unless going out to a place of some posh repute. Generally I just wear tracksuit bottoms.... without un**es wherever possible, because anything touching me hurts - especially jeans! Or at least, the jeans that I had. A very nice pair, all that crushed creasing at the front, faded patches etc..... but bloody painful. I always say to my friends / family, 'if you see me in jeans, you see me in pain'.... but hey, 16 years, you get good at hiding it. So I finally had the thought the other day to go shopping for new jeans - we were going to see 'and Juliet', and I was already sweating the pain and discomfort to come. I remembered seeing a while ago those stretchy type jeans, so I was on a mission. I went to Connor, and first looked at colours. Once I found the colour I liked (certain shade of blue) I started feeling them. Pretty quickly found a stretchy pair, chose my size, went and tried them on. Oh MY GOD!!! The smile on my face, they looked good, great in fact - and FELT good - GREAT! So comfortable. I did the bend over test and the squat test - so good!! I wouldn't even think of doing that in my old jeans, too scrunchy, too sore. I literally put them on when I got home, and wore them all day, just so happy to be wearing a pair of jeans, and not be in crushing, squashing, irritable pain. maybe the guys out there know what I am talking about??? I don't know what it is like for the ladies, all that 'pelvic' pain stuff post CES.
People get excited about having a baby, getting their first home or a new business, going on a world holiday.
Me, I was just happy to have comfy jeans.
That is what life 16 years post CES is like for me.
The small victories :)
How are you doing?

I've said it before and I'll say it again, there will always be blockages..........

A little while back I posted how happy I am that I can now sneeze without fear - you all know what that means!! Well now I am even more grateful, as I am into about day 3 of Covid, lots of sneezing going on, and not a single concern for my back, no stabbing pains, nothing. That's a win in my book!
There was a time not too long ago that this would have been my second worse case scenario, being that worst case happened a long time ago! And never to forget, that my whole CES encounter was initiated with a sneeze.
I hope you are all doing well out there!!

I can sneeze without fear! Life is good 😁😁. How is sneezing for you??

Seizing a moment right now - just feeling great, in spite of everything! Well everything lockdown anyway. 3 weeks till Spring here in Oz and I am already sewing so many seeds 😁
Tonight I feel strong and healthy in spite of nerve discomfort. Many times lately I have been pulled down by ongoing nerve discomfort in the saddle region. It has been a burden. But today I don't give a dam. The good far outways the bad.
So I am seizing a moment. I hope it hangs about for a long time!
Things that have helped me most lately;
25 hrs of teaching Pilates a week
A really good heater
Massage gun / foot massager / vibrating roller
Hot water bottles (the best!!)
Gardening.
Preparing seeds.
Demanding more of myself.
Cooking new stuff.
Vallium.
Circadin.
Accessing the Healing Power of the Vegas Nerve.
The 10 pressups a day for a month challenge that turned into 38 days that turned into add 1 each day till the end of June that went on through July and in August had the addition of ;'Squats per day challenge..... I have no end goal. Its not a challenge or a fad, its just a way of life for me now. A habit. 😁😁
I am documenting it over at Pilates at West Pennant Hills if you want to check it out.
I hope you are doing well in your life 💖

Interestingly this week I had 2 people present with sciatica. One is a client who comes to my Pilates classes, the other a neighbour. I could tell my client was struggling in class on Wednesday, she hadn't been for a while, and even then was having issues that were warning flags for me. Life, work, pandemics, all those things that got in her way took their toll. As well as some new trainings with friends, and not really listening to what was being said from her body. But yes, on Wednesday that all came to a head, so I called her later and we had a conversation. She was surprised and also relieved by some of the things I said, and I was not surprised and a little alarmed by some of the things she said. SO we organised a Zoom Pilates session for Friday, so we could have a serious 1:1 investigation. What surprised/worried me the most was that she (sorry to keep saying she, I just don't want to use a name for privacy) said that she had been watching youtube videos for advice, so I asked her what some of those things were 😟 ........ I said that I have watched many such videos on YT and been a bit horrified with some of the stuff.... so I had a good think about it for a couple of days and we did our Zoom session and went through the anatomy and thought processes of such things, then did about 5 exercises that I, through my own experience and education, thought of most benefit. I felt for my client because during the group class on Wednesday (which she kinda surprised me turning up at) I could see her pain, I could see her bracing herself and lifting out of positions to ease her nerve pain (on the fly I changed my class plan to be most accommodating...). During our Zoom session there was none of that pain, there were moments of feeling where the problem was, and there were moments of freedom and feeling 'nothing' - I told her those were the most important moments. I later made a 25 minute video for her to follow once per day till I see her next week - she very smartly realised that our 1:1's are the way forward. I was both afraid to be trying to help someone with something that I had failed at (a concept that I come up against often as a Pilates Instructor and health professional who was unable to stop themselves from getting CES) and at the same time thankful that I have as much knowledge and care to pass on to someone in a situation that I would not wish upon ANYONE. Most of my clients have heard my story, so they have a point of reference as to where I am coming from, I believe.
The other, my neighbour. He is a middle aged man, labourer, builder, gardener, concreter, bathroom refurbisher - he even helped me modify my Reformer :) He walked from over yonder, well, limp/hobbled. I was like 'what's wrong with you mate?'. He has told me on several occasions that his 'back is fu**ed' (builder speak), and I know how much he works. His Mum in law is my neighbour, he is 3 more doors over, only moved in about 8 months ago, redone a 1.1 mill $ house, pool surrounds, solar roof, windows, balconies, chimneys, gardens, driveways..... always doing something.... if not that doing the M I L 's bathroom, cutting, sawing, sanding....... omg it is never ending! It gives me a sore back just thinking about it. The heavy lifting, the loading...... He told me what he was feeling, this in his back, that in his glutes, under his glutes, down his calf.... his foot. I asked him to do one movement, yeah na. It is not my job to diagnose, so I just told him what I thought, and suggested ( he also asked ) he could see a phyiso, an osteo, go to the Doc, maybe get a MRI if it goes on, if it KEEPS going on (and I will say here that this is something I never would have considered / never considered but in hind sight / retrospect / with what I know) get a corto injection. Maybe I wasn't aggressive enough in my attempt to stop the worst case scenario?? Maybe I was too new age? I also said if he ever wants to, come see me, maybe I can help.... when we are not in lockdown.
That old adage often comes to me, 'if there was one thing you could change in your life, what would it be?'.......
I wouldn't have let this happen to me.
Sciatica is a warning.
S

ok so 2021 has been a bit of a s**t here in Sydney Australia. Certainly got off to a good start, showed a lot of promise with plans and holidays and pet sitting jobs, then just went to s**t. July I am feeling more like Julwhy????? 5 weeks in lockdown, who knows how many more to come.... it's like a repeat of 2020, only more familiar. Happy to still have my regular income managing to teach all of my Pilates classes on line, but that does come with it's own costs. The talking... so much talking.... so many more words than when you are face to face with your client... the repeating as well..... oh dear.... the sore throat and head ache at the end makes me think I have Covid every time.... :) It's pretty hard being on the floor so much as well. Way more than my usual work. A lot of sitting like I ironically am now on my bed typing this out, legs crossed, not particularly upright... but then I sit upright. Or on a roller or a Swiss ball, sometimes even in a chair. I kinda plan my work around what I feel I can capably do at that time of day, or for that many hours, so that is very cool and a blessing to be able to do that. But life is pretty insular, and it is easy to be lazy (although having said that I have done 1756 pressups since April 24), and I do try to get out to the bush for a walk, and do some gardening when its not blowing a gale here...... ce la vie....
but walking down the footpath tonight, and just observing that feeling of a basketball in my a**s, still, over 13 years later.... I do sometimes wonder, does it ever get any better than this?

OMG just wrote a mega post that magically disappeared itself....... thanks FB.... off to bed now, too tired to write it again..... tbc