Realised Potential

Earlier in my career, I believed my biggest barriers were external — workplace systems, structures, or men in leadership. But over time, I realized that the greatest limitations weren’t around me — they were the ones I placed on myself.

The feminist movement has broken down systemic barriers and created opportunities for women. But the 𝐧𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐞 𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐩𝐭—𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐮𝐬—𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐬.

So in the lead-up to 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐖𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧'𝐬 𝐃𝐚𝐲, I want to share four powerful lessons that reshaped my approach to leadership, success & growth:

𝟏. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐢𝐬𝐭: We tell ourselves stories about why we can’t succeed—"𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨", "𝘐’𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩", or "𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘴𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵". But here’s the key: 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐟𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐬. They are conditioned patterns, formed before we had the awareness to question them. The real work is making the unconscious conscious—so it stops driving our decisions.

𝟐. 𝐉𝐮𝐝𝐠𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐣𝐮𝐝𝐠𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐬: I used to judge behaviors harshly, especially when I felt someone was in my way. But judgment is often a reflection of inner criticism. When we show ourselves compassion, we extend that same understanding to others.

𝟑. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞’𝐬 𝐚 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐫—𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐭: A client was excited about a business idea but felt discouraged when her husband asked tough, pragmatic questions. At first, she saw it as criticism. But stepping back, she realized his intention was to protect her—to help her think critically before taking a risk. How often do we assume the worst when we’re challenged? What if, instead of frustration, we got curious? And how often do we allow our self-limiting beliefs hold us back from following through with exploring opportunities?

Continued in comments..