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The Relationship Space

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The Relationship Space

I help women date to avoid red flags, listen to their gut & attract an emotionally available partner (just like I did).

Get Roadmap to Love now: https://www.therelationshipspace.com.au/roadmap-to-love
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08/06/2026

This comment moved me- from a fellow author, and sensitive soul. (I ran into the other room to tell my partner immediately!)

One of the biggest misconceptions about dating is that people need to present themselves a certain way, that you need more confidence.

What I often see is that women need more clarity:

-More self-trust (rather than listening to everyone else’s opinion).

-More understanding of why you react the way they do (your feelings are telling you something).

-More confidence in your ability to choose well.

Dating feels overwhelming when every interaction feels loaded with meaning:

-When you’re worried about getting hurt, rejected, or that you’ll be alone forever; or that dating just doesn’t work for you.

-When you’re trying to work out whether it’s intuition or your anxiety, your gut or a past hurt showing up.

When you don’t trust yourself to get it right, dating is so stressful.

That’s why I wrote When Will It Happen For Me?

Not to give you a script, or to change who you are.

But to help you understand yourself more deeply so you can approach love with greater calm and self-trust.

If dating feels overwhelming right now, know you’re not alone.

What’s the part of dating that feels hardest for you?

04/06/2026

I am featured in the Sydney Morning Herald today discussing the dating trend of “yearning.”

And whilst yearning sounds romantic, I’ve spent years helping women understand why longing for someone isn’t the same thing as loving them.

Many of us have experienced it.

You meet someone.
Maybe you’ve only been on a handful of dates.
Maybe they’ve sent a few thoughtful messages.
Maybe they’re inconsistent, unavailable, or not fully choosing you.

Yet somehow, they start occupying far more space in your mind than they do in your life.
You imagine conversations that haven’t happened.
You imagine a future that hasn’t been built.
You feel intense emotions for someone you don’t yet truly know.

This is where I often encourage clients to pause.
Because sometimes what we’re feeling isn’t deep love.

It’s deep hope.
Hope that this person will choose us.
Hope that this time will be different.
Hope that an old wound might finally be healed through someone else’s love.

But healthy love isn’t built through longing.

It’s built through knowing:

Knowing someone’s character.
Knowing their values.
Knowing how they show up when life gets hard.
Knowing whether they consistently choose you back.

Connection requires two people. Yearning only requires one.

The most secure relationships I’ve seen aren’t built on endless longing.

They’re built on curiosity, consistency, reciprocity, and time.
I’m curious: Have you ever mistaken yearning for genuine connection?
Let me know below.

29/05/2026

We’re finally seeing a lot more about ADHD, Autism and relationships in the media. Whilst there are challenges that come with these conditions (hello emotion dysregulation!) that impact communication, they also come with real joy and strengths. Whilst I’ve seen affairs and conflict in these couples, I’ve also witnessed incredible tenacity and deep love and loyalty. I hope we continue to see neuroaffirming articles that decrease stigma and shame, and just maybe set off a little lightbulb in someone who wonders “is this me?” My work is guided by compassion, cultivating self-acceptance and lived experience (I’m a proud AuDHDer who knows what it’s like to struggle in love). Thanks to the lovely for having me & valuing lived experience.

28/05/2026

Maybe the problem isn’t that you haven’t found the right person yet.
 Maybe the deeper question is:

Who do you become when you’re with someone?

I loved this reframe from Esther Perel!

So many of us build long lists of what we want in a partner: funny, emotionally available, ambitious, attractive, grounded.
 But relationships aren’t built from checklists (some are just way too strict, and close you off from love)

They’re built through curiosity, compassion, shared values.
 And willingness to keep showing up as yourselves.

My partner and I are actually very different in many ways.
 But what makes us work is that we ask questions. We stay open. We let each other be fully ourselves, so that both have our needs met.
 Some of the healthiest relationships don’t look perfect on paper.
 They feel safe, expansive, and alive.

The older I get, the more I think love is less about finding someone who matches your list, and more about finding someone who helps you become more of yourself.

What do you think matters more in a relationship: compatibility on paper, or how you feel and grow together? Let me know x

23/05/2026

I’ve decided to enter the Randwick City Local Business Awards in the Outstanding Health category!

Over many years, I’ve had the privilege of helping women build secure, loving relationships, helping couples strengthen their bond, and shared my own story in my book When Will It Happen For Me?

What started as a passion for helping people heal their relationship patterns has grown into something beyond my dreams: Being able to tell my story in the media, so that every woman stops feeling shame about her relationship history, and finds hope and genuine guidance. Supporting colleagues in supervision, teaching couples and family therapy at a university level; and finding belief in my business skills (whilst navigating an ADHD brain nonetheless).

And while I still have moments of self-doubt (thanks to J for hearing those often), I’m proud of the heart behind this work and the community here that sees just as much value in cultivating healthy relationships.

Thank you for being here, and if you’d love to vote for me, head to link in bio, or comment “vote”

17/05/2026

Congrats to fellow writer on the launch of her debut book Solo Mum By Choice. This is one inspiring human, writer, and mother- her book tells the story of her hopes to be a mother and give love to a child. Her IVF rounds hit double digits showing tenacity and courage. The book explores her path from dating too one too many frogs and realising she was moulding herself to society’s expectations of partnership- and breaking free- to follow her authentic path to solo motherhood. Lorena, the publishing world is tough, and I admire your fight to tell your story. Highly recommend this read to any woman considering solo motherhood. 💕🩷🙌⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

08/05/2026

You meet someone and at first it feels exciting.
There’s chemistry. Intensity. Hope.

But then, slowly, you start questioning things; there’s an anxiety you can’t suppress. You think it’s you being anxious, but you notice behaviours too:

* they don’t ask deeper questions
* conversations revolve around them
* you’re analysing texts
* It feels heavy

Sometimes it’s months or years when you look back and think: “How did I miss the signs?”

But often, you didn’t miss them. You just mistook familiarity for compatibility. You downplayed how you felt.

Why? Well, when we grow up learning to chase connection, no matter how inconsistent, fleeting, or stressful, our nervous system can confuse activation with attraction.

Or, we get drawn to the thing we most seek (deep chats, validation, words) even if it’s inconsistent.

Healthy love isn’t about the spark, attraction, or words. It’s built on: curiosity, reciprocity, effort. Emotional safety comes from consistency, and the willingness to have real conversations.

This is why I teach you to stop choosing purely based on how someone makes you feel in the moment…

and start looking at the data. Their actions. Their consistency. Their capacity for mutual connection.

Because your authentic self-your grounded, healed adult self- does not choose based on intensity alone.

Choose what is actually good for you.

That’s the work we do inside my mini dating course and journal, Roadmap to Love-
�learning to trust your gut, understand your patterns, regulate dating anxiety, and choose secure, mutual love.

Comment or DM “ROADMAP” if you want the link.

23/04/2026

Today is World Book Day, and I found myself reflecting on this journey.

A story about a woman (and psychologist) finding secure love after too many red flags. This is your story too.
 From writing this book quietly, editing its pages, to holding it in my hands. 
To seeing it in bookstores, then speaking about it on radio and TV.  
And now, watching it support women (and my male clients too) in ways I once needed myself.

This book was never just about dating.

It was about those moments of feeling alone, lost, and doubting oneself.
 “Why does this feel so hard for me?” “Am I doing this wrong?” “I said too much”

I know that place deeply.
The overthinking. The self-doubt. The feeling of doing “all the work”, and still not having the love you want.

What I’ve learned, and see each day at work, is that:

You don’t find healthy love by becoming someone else. 
You find it by learning how to feel safe being yourself; meeting your own emotional needs and loving yourself first.

That’s what this book walks you through

If you’re healing from heartbreak, have lost yourself in relationships, and want more from love-

This is for you. You can find it via the link in my bio or comment BOOK and I’ll send it to you.

And if you’ve already read it, I’d love to know what landed for you

22/04/2026

Most breakups don’t end when the relationship ends.

The emotions linger, your mind overthinks.   Then there’s the urge to reach out, or doubting your decision.

And no one really teaches you how to manage that, especially when you’re alone for the first time.

So when I was featured in a piece penned by the wise in speaking about separation, I shared something I see all the time:
It’s not just heartbreak you’re navigating-  it’s your patterns, your emotions, fears for the future, and loss of love.

That’s why moving on can feel so hard.

Because part of you is still relating to them like a partner- when the reality is, something has shifted.

And this is the work that no one teaches you:

Learning to regulate your emotions instead of reacting from them. 
Setting boundaries that actually protect your energy.
 And slowly separating who they were to you… from who they are now.

That’s where your power comes back.

If you want to read the full article:
DM me “ARTICLE” and I’ll send you the link.

And if you’re healing after heartbreak, trying to make sense of what happened, and how to move forward without losing yourself in the process, that’s what my book When Will It Happen For Me? is here to help you do- heal the patterns, rebuild trust in yourself, and open to real, secure, mutual love. Link in bio.

14/04/2026

You can want love deeply… and still be blocking it, without even realising it. Take 5 Magazine, True Stories, Puzzles, Prizes
 I see this in so many women I work with, and it was once me too.

Our protective walls are sneaky, and our nervous system is warding off danger.

In this article, I shared some of the most common ways we push love away:
– Shutting down when things feel vulnerable – Choosing emotionally unavailable partners – Overthinking instead of showing up authentically – Staying in situations that don’t meet your needs

These patterns aren’t random. They’re learned from earlier experiences where it wasn’t safe to be fully seen, to have needs, or to trust love.

So instead, you adapt. You protect yourself, you hold back.  
But those strategies can loosen up when love feels safe; the right love, will persist when it matters, will try to break through those walls, will be prepared to have the important conversations and respect your needs.
 Walls keep love out, and vulnerability will build connection. And this is exactly what I go deeper into in my book.

Not just what the patterns are (you know that part mostly)- But how to actually shift them, so you can feel safe enough to let love in.
 If this resonated, my book When Will It Happen For Me? will help you understand your patterns, and finally start changing them. Page by page, exercise by exercise.

Comment BOOK and I’ll send you the details (available in paperback and ebook) (or head to the link in my bio)

Address

Suite 5, Level 1, 35-37 Perouse Road, Randwick
Sydney, NSW
2031

Opening Hours

Monday	10am - 6pm
Tuesday	10am - 6pm
Wednesday	10am - 6pm
Friday	10am - 6pm

Telephone

+61404247383

Website

http://www.therelationshipspace.com.au/

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