The Kind Mumma

This happens, these scenarios can happen in small snippets of your day or week. I'm focusing on when they become habits and reoccurring habits. It is up to you to be self aware and find what triggers you and then recognizing behaviours you are inhibiting when reacting to a feeling or emotion that is surfacing.

Example; You are feeling underappreciated and juggling too much and your partner is not pulling his end of the bargain. Reality is your partner is not a mind reader so what we tend to do is react and explore behaviours to try and make it obvious we are unhappy. This could be snide comments or being belittling saying things like " You wont no what to do let me just do it , I do it all the time ". Its not okay and the issue is within you and not your partner. We need to be self aware and recognize that there is a lack of communication on your half.

We need to be able to find a medium where we can discuss and communicate things that arent serving us. Then we need to address that you need YOU time. Not having a shower or getting the groceries but time to focus on yourself and recharge and refocus. This will create you to live more in the present and be kinder to yourself and others.

Also, we are not perfect and there are going to be times when we do say things and act in ways that can be hurtful to our children and partner. We are human, this is a time after reflection to apoligise. Apologising to our children displays a strong message that adults can make mistakes too and just because we are an adult doesnt excuse negative behaviour.

I hope that you are kind to yourself this weekend. If you are feeling overwhelmed, annoyed, deflated find an activity that will bring you joy and try and create space for yourself.

How do we work on recognizing and accepting what makes us human? It's realizing and accepting our imperfections and that there will be days where you just dont feel like you can get your s**t together. We can start by focusing and embracing our vulnerabilities. The word vulnerable can put knots in a person's stomach. "Just be vulnerable", no thanks Karen don't you remember society has over shadowed this term and now we all classify being vulnerable as being weak. What mother or women wants to come across as weak right....

Why do we as a culture not want to share our vulnerabilities? It can be painful, it can bring up emotions and of course there is the fear that if we do share people can hold it against us, use it as an insult or even put it out as gossip. "Did you hear about Lucy...yeah shes going to put her child in a new daycare apparently". Ok stop the gossip it doesnt make you a better mum talking others down.

Then theres the women who are walking around with vulnerability hangovers and to be frank I think most women at some point in their life have faced this. There may have been a situation where you are speaking with a work colleague or friend and needing support or clarity on how you feel. You start diving deep into your vulnerabilities and after 20 minutes it feels like you have unleashed in a therapy session. Thoughts race " should I have told the cleaner about my breast feeding struggles, is she going to tell the others I'm considering switching to formula, I hope she doesnt think I'm a depressed mum because I said I felt flat today".
As women we can find shame in being vulnerable especially when we have purged to people we have not got a strong bond or connection with. I want to change the way we approach this word vulnerable. When someone has the courage to share themselves with us it is the person receiving the informations chance to show compassion and connection. When we are self aware we will no who are safe people to share our vulnerabilities too. Building strong connections and foundations with others will allow you to become self aware of what you say and who you share yoruself with.

It is about understanding and managing how you feel

To our darling children if only you knew what is inside mummas heart.

She loves you so much at times shes cried happy tears to herself.

She thinks about you when she has just said goodnight to you and looks through her phone at photos of you.

She loves you more than herself. As much as it can pain her she puts aside her self worth as you mean more than anything to her.

You make her life more meaningful and provide her with a purpose she never thought she needed.

Everytime your upset a little piece of her heart breaks. She never wants you to feel sad.

She finds herself smiling randomly purely because you are her child.

The days feel long but the weeks go quick and she wants to soak up every bit of your being.

She thinks about the person you will be in the future and wants to do her best that you achieve your dreams.

When she feels fed up and you have finally gone to sleep. Theres a sense of guilt and worry that you sensed mum was not coping. So mum goes to your bed and kisses you one more time on the cheek in your sleep.

The loving mumma..
Love

Working hard when my little love sleeps so I can get my informative kits out for sale. I have been really diving deep into preconception and find it fascinating how much women are not taught. In fact I studied personal health and development education and am a fully qualified (non practising) PDHPE high school teacher and I never learnt the stuff I have learnt over the past 4 years. In fact who remembers the one lesson in year 11 when you put a condom on a banana.

Things may have changed since 2005 and I hope that they have for my daughters sake. I am so motivated and excited to share this educational wisdom to prepare women and educate them that there is so much more to falling pregnant.

For those asking I can not put a date on the release of this package. However as always I do share posts regularly which have some of the information in bite sized form.

Now I'd like to get back to writing with my beautiful essential oils in the diffuser. For anyone who is keen to start an oil journey is not only a beautiful mumma, teacher but an oil enthusiast 🌻✌

💃
📷 .photo

As women we see ourselves as the caregivers and the helpers therefore this character we give yourself has a hold over us asking for help. That voice in our head saying " we don't ask for help, we are the ones meant to do it all have it all together. If I ask for help then I will look weak and that's shameful". Shame plays a huge role in having blocks for women to ask help. We attach ideas that arent true and spend our time feeling miserable and exhausted so and idea we created in our head wont play out.

But ladies we are all the same. As soon as someone asks me for help I am there for them as I know you would be in some capacity too. But we have some how managed to convince ourselves that we shouldn't ask for help so we dont ask for it! So what happens to us internally?

Well everyone and everything starts to agitate you. Small tasks seem out of reach and when someone makes a comment about how exhausted they are you want to rage. So we are getting angry because no one offers help. Cant these idiots see I'm slowly drowning? Is it not obvious I could use a hand? Then its their fault because they arent supporting you and asking for help. We start blaming our partners or friends or family when really it's on us to communicate what we need.

We are getting angry because we arent getting help but we are feeling ashamed to ask for help as we are worried about peoples opinions we create in our minds.

When we are self aware and sure of ourselves asking for help will come naturally. There will be nothing attached to it except the joy of having HELP from someone who cares about you. I practice this at the shops. I have asked strangers for help with groceries, picking something I've dropped whilst carrying 5 bags and a baby. I promise you these peoples lives weren't impacted because I needed help. We all do. Those simple tasks that are driving you insane and making you nuts dont have to. I hope this encourages you to ask for help when you need it. I am only a DM away if you would like to ask for help through this online platform.

What part of your day or week do you take part in self reflection? It is very easy for us to self criticize when we are talking to our friends or partner or even ourself. But when do you take the time to create awareness of your own thoughts and feelings and self reflection?

I have some self journalling prompts that are fitting to take part in at the end of every week. It is a nice way to start fresh and get focused for the next week ahead. I do encourage you to buy or make a journal where you can physical write out your answers. Words and spells so when you write it creates magic!

Journal prompts to promote self awareness and create mental shifts.

1. What behaviour or pattern of thought do I want to change? ( I want to stop being negative about my body image )

2. You will need affirmations to support this goal. Create ones that feel natural. ( I grew a baby with this body, I create magic with this body, I care about my body)

3. This is the part you need to put your energy into. I want you to elaborate on your goal. You are writing a scene. You could call this manifesting. When we write it out it starts to become reality. ( This week when I find myself looking in the mirror I need to remember my affirmations. I will practice gratitude for my body. I will make positive health choices so I feel no guilt on how I have treated my body).

I hope this give you something to work towards and that you have an amazing week ahead. Remember this does not have to begin on a Sunday. Change does not start on Mondays. It starts the day you decide to show up 🌻🌻🌻

Let's change our self talk. I dont no about everyone else but the shift in energy the past week has been intense. Because of this intensity around the planets and shifts (go to ) feelings and thoughts have been amplified.

In every day and every moment of our lives our thoughts are determining how we feel and behave. Are you aware of your thoughts? Do you hold yourself accountable for the way YOU CHOOSE to feel?

Given our thoughts have a huge amount of power over our lives we need to knuckle down on our thoughts being FACTS and TRUTH because more than likely... they are not!

We need to start questioning is it a fact that is coming into our thoughts or a belief? Even though you make think self talk feels like its facts it does not mean it is! How can we address our self talk to allow to cope, manage and prepare for situations better?

Firstly look at these scenarios:
- What is the truth
- What is the evidence to support your thought
- Is there another possible way to view the situation
- Can you shift your attitude towards the situation

I am currently working on an amazing tool for women who will get the education they need to cut the drama and toxicity they attract and believe in their life for good. It starts with you and how you choose to show up. We did not get taught this in school. We did not get taught how to parent when we feel like we have no more to give. We did not get told at the hospital what to do to be more self aware. There is not enough information and guidance out there to put all this in simple terms! I got you babes.

Sleep deprivation:

I just want to be clear that all women can handle certain amounts of sleep differently. It is to do with our genetic makeup and individual constitution. Some women are night owls and some are early risers. Some women can function of little sleep and some women need a solid eight hours.

Our babies are so smart that they sleep lightly to protect themselves from SIDS. All babies wake during the night through sleep cycles however, some babies can fall back asleep and some need support from their mumma.

Your baby isnt a good baby because they can sleep through the night, your baby has worked out sleep cues and their sleep environment. Your baby isnt a good baby if they only wake once because they soiled their nappy, your baby was just communicating to you for hygiene and comfort. Your baby isnt a terrible sleeper because they are teething and feel like crap at 2am from waking. They just want their mum and that instant feeling of I'm going to be ok. I know at the age of 33 when I feel like crap my mums words and comfort help me.

You see this is part of their development. There is a strong biological reason your baby wakes. Yes they will wake up and want to be close to you! Babies are naturally built to seek out their mummas so they can survive. What do us mummas provide them? Support, nutrition, a sense of safety, we soothe them, immunity and regulation... this was happening in the womb ladies! So next time you think why isnt my baby sleeping through the night remember its primal and also remember it is not forever.

When you take on the responsibility of being a parent and guardian to your bubba you need to find solice in you are there for them so they survive. It's up to you as a mumma to be self aware and incorporate self care into your day so you are supported and held through sleep deprivation. Remember bubba is tired too.. its bloody hard figuring out this new world. You got this sleeping beauties !

" And since we all came from a woman
Got our name from a women
I wonder why we take from our women
Why we r**e our women,do we hate our women?
And if we dont we'll have a race of babies
That will hate the ladies, that make the babies
And since a man cant make one
He has no right to tell a woman when and where to create one
So will the real men get up
I know your fed up ladies, BUT KEEP YOUR HEAD UP 🌠

If you want to be happy, set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy, and inspires your hopes. - Andrew Carnegie

It is a new season, a time for change, the air will be fresher, the sun will feel different, time will be a bit slower as we move from the busy summer to slowly autumn. Where are you looking to find your joy? Is it with your children? Your partner? Where can you find joy in other areas of your life that separates you from being a mother. I am finding my joy in cooking slow cooked nourishing foods this week to heal my families immune system.

I am finding joy in resting and reading and writing. I am finding joy in the small things like buying flowers for myself and booking in a foot massage. Joy is so forgotten about when it comes to our health, what brings you joy brings you hope and happiness! I hope this week is a good one for you and you can find joy.

To be a women is the biggest blessing so dont feel cursed when you feel like your body is giving up. To be a women is courageous the love we have for our children, the primal instincts we have is unlike anything else. It is embedded in our DNA to nurture, guard, raise and give love and hope and light to these star beams.

Carrying a child for over nine months is an experience where we sacrifice our mind, body and spirit as we become not one entity but two. It is a gift and a privilege many women pray and dream to be able to do. Be mindful of the words you speak when you are carrying a child, for they can hear and feel your thoughts as do the women who may not be as fortunate at this time isn their life. It is a portion of your life where you are a vessel to carry and create a divine being. Swollen ankles and nausea is not air curse,it is clarity that you are creating something extraordinary.

It feels like forever and then one day your child is growing up and the highs and lows or pregnancy seem like a distant memory.

To all the mums who are pregnant, trying to conceive, still birth, transition, miscarriage or still mourning any of these I send you love for remember you once too were that tiny baby growing safely in mummas womb.