Skill Kids For Life

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Go to the crying child. The wrong coloured pencil, the sand in their shoe, the book that they didn’t want to read - it’s all a big deal to them.

Think about the life experiences they’ve had. They haven’t experienced what we have and therefore have no frame of reference for how big their problem objectively is (or from an adult’s point of view).

Children under 7 are also still in the egocentric stage of development, where everything is all about them.

Plus, their prefrontal cortex isn’t anywhere near as developed as an adult’s, meaning they don’t have the ability to regulate themselves, or are only just beginning to learn this.

Dismissing their feelings (e.g. “you get what you get and you don’t get upset”…) or leaving them to deal with their emotions on their own can stay with them. If it happens consistently without a caregiver acknowledging or repairing afterwards, it can be stored in their brain and body along with other similar experiences (in their implicit memory), and contribute to their core beliefs (schemas), perceptions, and assumptions about the world as they grow up.

Meeting a child’s feelings with shame, ridicule or punishment also puts their nervous system under stress and their brain in a more reactive state, meaning they will remain in a heightened state and be more likely to become upset or triggered again.

There is just too much research and evidence behind this for it to be ignored.⠀
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If a child is upset, go to them.

And as always - parents, teachers, anyone caring for children - we don’t have to get it right 100% of the time. We just have to be good enough. We’re all still learning and doing the best we can with the resources we have.

S6 Episode 20 - Starting High School - A guide for parents – Parental As Anything ABC Podcast - Maggie Dent Like it or not, children will learn to swear from school, videos, even their parents. So what can you do to stop your child being a pottymouth? In this Help Me, Maggie episode Maggie Dent explains why children might swear, how to discourage them from using offensive words and what to say if you slip...

Alienating a child from their other parent or grandparents is child abuse 😔

This 💜

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Force is Violence
Forcing children to do what they are afraid to do is one very quick way to mess up their innate ability to judge their readiness to undertake new tasks and learnings. We have all seen the child who looks on and observes a situation or activity before attempting it. Sometimes the deliberation lasts only minutes, sometimes hours, but it can take days and even weeks; yet eventually the child takes the risk and moves into action when SHE has judged herself ready. Let each child choose their own timing, let them assess the risk and take it when they are ready.

Please be aware of your children's usage of their devices

A timely reminder as we mourn Texas' sad loss 🌈

If you don't listen to the small stuff, they won't come to you with the big stuff 🙌🏽

Most young people want to talk, but don't know how. When a young person opens up to you, it could be the most important conversation you will have all year 💙