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Dear Mom and Dad,

Please stick with me.

I can’t think clearly right now because there is a rather substantial section of my prefrontal cortex missing. It’s a fairly important chunk, something having to do with rational thought. You see, it won’t be fully developed until I’m about 25. And from where I sit, 25 seems a long way off.

It doesn’t matter that I’m smart; even a perfect score on my math SAT doesn’t insulate me from the normal developmental stages that we all go through. Judgement and intelligence are two completely distinct things.

And, the same thing that makes my brain wonderfully flexible, creative and sponge-like also makes me impulsive. Not necessarily reckless or negligent but more impulsive than I will be later in life.

Please stick with me.

So when you look at me like I have ten heads after I’ve done something “stupid” or failed to do something “smart,” you’re not really helping.
You adults respond to situations with your prefrontal cortex (rationally) but I am more inclined to respond with my amygdala (emotionally). And when you ask, “What were you thinking?” the answer is I wasn’t, at least not in the way you are. You can blame me, or you can blame mother nature, but either way, it is what it is.

At this point in my life, I get that you love me, but my friends are my everything. Please understand that. Right now I choose my friends, but, don’t be fooled, I am watching you. Carefully.

Please stick with me.

Here’s what you can do for me

1. Model adulting.
I see all the behaviors that you are modeling and I hear all of the words you say. I may not listen but I do hear you. I seem impervious to your advice, like I’m wearing a Kevlar vest but your actions and words are penetrating. I promise. If you keep showing me the way, I will follow even if I detour many, many times before we reach our destination.

2. Let me figure things out for myself.
If you allow me to experience the consequences of my own actions I will learn from them. Please give me a little bit of leash and let me know that I can figure things out for myself. The more I do, the more confidence and resilience I will develop.

3. Tell me about you.
I want you to tell me all the stories of the crazy things you did as a teen, and what you learned from them. Then give me the space to do the same.

4. Help me with perspective.
Keep reminding me of the big picture. I will roll my eyes at you and make all kinds of grunt-like sounds. I will let you know in no uncertain terms that you can’t possibly understand any of what I’m going through. But I’m listening. I really am. It’s hard for me to see anything beyond the weeds that I am currently mired in. Help me scan out and focus on the long view. Remind me that this moment will pass.

5. Keep me safe.
Please remind me that drugs and driving don’t mix. Keep telling me that you will bail me out of any dangerous situation, no anger, no lectures, no questions asked. But also let me know over and over and over that you are there to listen, when I need you.

6. Be kind.
I will learn kindness from you and if you are relentless in your kindness to me, someday I will imitate that behavior. Don’t ever mock me, please and don’t be cruel. Humor me-I think I know everything. You probably did as well at my age. Let it go.

7. Show interest in the things I enjoy.
Some days I will choose to share my interests with you, and it will make me feel good if you validate those interests, by at least acting interested.
One day when the haze of adolescence lifts, you will find a confident, strong, competent, kind adult where a surly teenager once stood. In the meantime, buckle in for the ride.

Please stick with me.

Love,

Your Teenager

Dear Mom and Dad, Please Stick With Me The things I do that you think are "crazy" are just me being a teen and going through normal stuff. Here are 7 things I want you to know.

The whole world paused this morning.
Do you know why? Because an 8 year old’s tank was empty.

The boys had already started their school day at their desks and I was preparing to leave for work when I noticed my littlest standing in the bathroom wiping his face.

I paused at the door and asked if he was okay. He looked up with tears silently dripping and shook his head. When I questioned if something happened, again he shook his head.

So I sat on the side of the tub and pulled him in my lap. I told him sometimes our heart tanks feel empty and need to be refilled.

He cried into my chest and I held tight.
I asked if he could feel my love filling him up?
A nod, and tears stopped...

I waited a minute...

‘Has it reached your toes yet?’
He shook his head no...

‘Okay man. We will take as long as you need. Work doesn’t matter right now. School isn’t important either. This right here, is the most important thing today, okay? Filling you back to the top. Is that good?’
*nods*

One more minute...
‘Is your heart full of mamas love now?’
‘Yeah...’
*looks in his eyes* I see it shining in there, you’re full to the top, and you’re smiling!

Y’all. You may not be 8- you may be 28, 38, 48 or whatever- but ALL of us run on empty just like he did. His week was so busy and so full and his little soul was just dry!!!

We all have to pause, and take a moment to refill with the good things. Scripture, prayer, sunshine, worship, song, laughter, friends, hugs. Refill your empty, or you’ll find those emotions (tears, anger, snappy words) overflowing with no reason why.

Take a moment. Refill. It’s the most important part of your day!
☀️ 🌻

Shared from Robertson 💕

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Keep going Moms! We will get through this!!

ONLY CHILDREN IN GRADE R (and higher) may now return to schools from the 6th of July 2020.
The Minister of Basic Education has amended the Directions on the re-opening of schools (published on 23 June 2020) in Government Notice 357 of 2020 published in 29 June 2020 by deleting the definition of “pre-Grade R”. This means that these directions now do not make provision for any learner or child other than those in schools (Grades R to 12).
This effectively means (in terms of children 6 years and younger) that ONLY children in Grade R may return to a public or independent school on the scheduled date (6 July 2020), and no other younger children, even if their classes are part of a school (pre-Grade R/ pre-school, etc).https://www.gov.za/sites/default/files/gcis_document/202006/43488gen357.pdf
Thus, whether it is an early childhood development programme that falls under the provisions of the Children's Act 38 of 2005 or a pre-Grade R class/pre-school that is attached to a school, there currently is no date for the returning of these children and a date(s) to be announced by the respective Ministers needs to be awaited. (so basically, at this stage, no one is opening before the other).

www.gov.za

Parents what are your thoughts?

Lockdown: Top researcher says younger children should return to school first The lockdown is bad for the wellbeing of young children, and they should be first to return to school as the group least at risk according to the data, a respected researcher has argued.

https://www.news24.com/SouthAfrica/News/back-to-school-how-facilities-will-be-kept-clean-and-safe-once-schools-re-open-20200430

Back to school: How facilities will be kept clean and safe once schools re-open According to Basic Education Minister Angie Motshekga, the department was working with the Department of Health to implement the procedures, which also cover early childhood development facilities.