Mickey Roothman - Transformational Breakthrough Coach & Speaker

*** SELF-AWARENESS ***

When events happen in our lives that don't feel so good, we're taught from a young age to find the problem outside of ourselves to feel better.

If you came home crying to your mom that some girls at school were mean to you, your mom usually made you feel better by telling you something along the lines of "they're just mean or jealous of you".

We're not taught to look within ourselves but rather externally for the cause of difficulty or pain.

Our mothers never said anything like: "Why does it bother you so much when someone is mean to you?" or "How does that make you feel and why?".

This is why so many of us as adults struggle with self-awareness and emotional intelligence.

We sooth ourselves by focusing on or blaming something on the outside of us, when really these kinds of experiences are opportunities for us to learn, grow, heal and evolve.

People and things trigger us daily, but would you rather keep getting triggered?

Or would you rather next time something similar happens not be effected by it at all because you healed within you the thing that got triggered in the first place?

Healing and growth never comes from excusing and absolving ourselves from taking ownership of our own "stuff".

And we all have stuff!

As a Life Coach who has worked with people from ALL walks of life I can assure you that all humans have "stuff". And we all have pretty much the same "issues" too, myself included.

But very few are brave enough to turn inward when the not so good experiences come, to find what needs to heal inside of us to get the healing, evolution and growth we're meant to from these experiences.

Its easier to tell ourselves its because of the other person, something they did, some external factor or circumstance than it is to take responsibility for what happens in our lives ourselves.

Self awareness isn't about bashing yourself.
It isn't about feeling bad about yourself.
It isn't about criticizing yourself.
It isn't about being disappointed in yourself or regretting anything.
It isn't about justifying our own actions, reactions or feelings.
It isn't about absolving others or ourselves of any responsibility.
It isn't about finding excuses for who we are or what we do.

Self awareness is one of the biggest gifts we can give ourselves and everyone in our lives at present and in our future.

It allows us to question why we do the things we do, why we act and react the way we do, so that we can heal the things within ourselves that aren't broken but wounded.

Self awareness helps us to unbecome who we became because of past experiences from our childhood that made us adapt and change in the first place.

Working on yourself, looking inward and becoming self aware is scary. It can be painful at times. But I promise you it is SO worth it!

Its only by turning inward to question yourself and your own actions, perceptions and feelings instead of focusing outward and blaming or projecting them onto someone or something else, that we heal, grow, learn and evolve.

Our past wounds are like a thorn in our flesh.
Each time someone bumps into it, it hurts.
But its not about the person that bumped us.
Its about the thorn in our flesh.
You can either choose to pull it out and you'll never face that thorn or pain of it being bumped again.
Or, you'll always blame others for your pain when they bump into that thorn that's sticking out and in the way, and expect others to be careful of bumping or touching your thorn.

This is why I became a life coach.
I was tired of my own thorns hurting me and others.
I was tired of other people's thorns hurting me and themselves.
I was tired of witnessing humanity bleed their own wounds onto each other, destroying each other instead of healing our own wounds.

Through my own journey I finally realized that looking inward and becoming self-aware is the only way to stop hurting ourselves and each other with the thorns we have in our flesh, the ones that we mostly don't even know that we have at a subconscious level. Until we become self-aware.

Blaming the person or thing that bumped your thorn doesn't get rid of it.

And unfortunately neither does saying things like: "God closed this door because He has something better for me." Although this is a very well meant thing to say to make someone or even ourselves feel better about what's happened, it doesn't help us to take ownership of our own thorns. It doesn't help us to get rid of them. The next person or thing will just bump it again until we are willing to investigate, acknowledge and pull out our own thorns.

Nothing is ever about the other person or the event.
Its always just your soul's way of mirroring to you what your own thorns are.

But., we can only pull them out if we turn inward towards ourselves, to discover, acknowledge, face and take ownership and ultimately victory over them.

DEAR WONDERFUL WOMAN

▪️ You are valued.
▪️ You are worthy.
▪️ You are deserving.
▪️ You matter.
▪️ You are deeply loved.
▪️ You are deeply appreciated.
▪️ You are needed.
▪️ You have a divine purpose.
▪️ You are miraculous, amazing and powerful.
▪️ You are resilient, strong and courageous in your own way.
▪️ You are MORE THAN ENOUGH!

Happy Womens Day beautiful souls 🌸🌸🌸

May your week ahead be filled with blessings and breakthroughs beyond what you can imagine! 💛

“Look deeply within each person you encounter, no matter how brilliant or dull, refined or crude, righteous or wicked you judge this person to be.

Beyond their clothes, beyond their skin, beyond their behavior, beyond their words. Beyond the emotions they show, the personality in which they dress, past whatever masks they don to conceal their inner woes.

Look deeply and see the vicious war each one fights inside, the battle to remain human in a maddening world—a world you will never know, for no two of us are placed in the same world and no two of us confront the same challenges.

True, perhaps not everyone fights every battle. Some have long surrendered. But the very fact that this person was assigned this battle tells us more than can be spoken.

That alone is enough to admire, and to be humbled, asking yourself, “Do I fight a battle nearly as fierce as the one I expect this person to win? In what way am I any better?”

💛 We are all enough exactly as we are 💛

― Rabbi Tzvi Freeman

Happy Friday everyone! 💛💛💛
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👉🏻 WE’RE ALL REALLY JUST KIDS TRYING TO BUILD RELATIONSHIPS 👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻

◼️ Between the ages of 2-7 years old, our sub-conscious mind is on "RECORD".

◼️ That recording is then basically on "PLAY & REPEAT" for the rest of our lives mostly subconsciously without us even knowing.

◼️ This literally means that if we're not aware of the programming our innocent little minds recorded about childhood experiences that we weren't yet able to reason out with any level of real truth or understanding, we repeat that programming throughout our lives as adults in every area of our lives.

💟 For example, lets say when you were 4 years old your sister pulled your hair, and when you told your mom about it, she gave both of you a hiding.

💟 Your innocent little mind in that moment gave meaning to that (without being able to really reason it out with any level of truth) like for instance "Even when I do nothing wrong it is my fault and I must be punished."

⏭ Now fast forward 20 years down the line ... your partner cheats on you, but you're the one who ends up apologizing to them because you got upset about it and you beat yourself up about getting angry with them. ...

🔹🔹🔹 So even though YOU did nothing wrong, the story you told yourself when you were little is on play and repeat in your subconscious mind which tells you that even when you do nothing wrong you deserve to be punished.

👆🏻This is just one of a million childhood experiences we'll have in our subconscious programming that still plays out in our adulthood about love, relationships, ourselves, money, success and every area of our lives on "autopilot" until we bring it to conscious awareness and change the initial "faulty" programming we received during our childhood years.

♦️ One of the biggest things that effect (and so often destroy) every area of our lives and all of our adulthood relationships with other people is our sub-conscious programming.

I myself had may limiting beliefs from childhood experiences and the meaning my little innocent mind attached to them back then.

♥️♥️♥️ But the GREAT news is, you CAN begin to change that recording and re-record the initial programming about any area of your life using these 4 easy steps: 👇🏻

1️⃣ Choose what area of your life you want to work on (relationships, self esteem, money, etc.)

2️⃣ Start your sentence with the area of life you want to work on (for example "Money is or I am" and write down everything that comes to mind and that you think about that, like money is scarce, hard to make etc. or I am not good enough, not likeable etc.)

3️⃣ Ask yourself about each of the things you wrote down: "Where does this belief come from?" - your mind will most likely bring up the most recent experiences but keep asking the question till you find the original childhood experience that you feel may have caused that belief.

4️⃣ As your wiser adult self, tell yourself the truth about that experience, for example my mom didn't also hit me because I did something wrong, she was just under pressure with my dad losing his job and didn't know any better at that time. It isn't true that everything is always your fault and that you have to be punished for what other people do wrong. You matter and you are good enough. (The aim is to re-frame the story you told yourself about it as a child and to flip the belief that you formed as a child around to the belief you want now about that thing).

This may seem silly to you at first but you will actually FEEL the shift and relief that happens inside of you when you do this and as you let go of the old story that wasn't ever really true in the first place. 💛💛💛

PS: If you’re ready to transform your old programming in every area of your life and consciously create and live your best life, get in touch with me and lets connect. Its a very gratifying and special journey and I’d be honored to guide you through it and to share in it with you. ✨✨✨

LET IT GO! 💛
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When we focus on what’s out of our control we experience
👉🏻 Stress
👉🏻 Anxiety
👉🏻 Fear
👉🏻 Overwhelm
👉🏻 Resentment
👉🏻 Burnout
👉🏻 Feeling stuck
👉🏻 And so much more that weighs us down:

The 🔑 is to turn inward and remember what you do have control over.

✨ This will not only subside all of those chaotic thoughts and emotions, but also get you into a better space to see solutions or to surrender and let it go.

✨ When we focus outward at the things we cannot control, it leaves us feeling hopeless and helpless. We suffer.

✨ When we focus inward at what we can control, we feel empowered and can receive the guidance, support and everything else we need to move forward and beyond.

💛💛💛💛💛

𝙒𝙚 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙛𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖 𝙗𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙣𝙤 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬𝙨 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩!

You might 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙠 you “know” a lot about a person, but fact is we all know very little.

Just have 𝙜𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙚. Whether with the waiter getting your order wrong, the delivery man being late, the shop assistant ‘ignoring’ you, the friend who is not texting you back, the business owner seemingly not delivering as promised, the employee not performing, the boss pushing for a few last sales.

𝙒𝙚 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙛𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖 𝙗𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙣𝙤 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬𝙨 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩!

Just be kind - It costs nothing!
You never know what your lack of kindness and grace could end up costing that person. You never know how valuable your kindness and grace towards them may be to them either. 💛