04/26/2015
Carter's story is at the end of this post.
It’s normal for a baby to cry and it’s normal to feel frustrated when he or she won’t stop. Sometimes, in that moment, you might feel like you are going to lose control. In that moment, do not shake the baby. No matter how bad it gets or how tired and frustrated you feel, shaking the baby, putting the baby down roughly or throwing the baby is never the answer. Instead, calm yourself and calm your baby. Take a short break. Put the baby in a safe place and walk away.
Think ahead about how you can manage the inevitable frustrations of caring for a crying baby. We have a plan for many things in our lives; we need to have a plan for what we will do when a baby will not stop crying. Parents, babysitters and caregivers need to plan how they will—and won't—deal with a crying child. Parents should share the dangers of shaking with everyone who cares for their baby.
Saying "don't shake a baby" is not enough. You need to make a plan."
http://www.childrenscolorado.org/File%20Library/Wellness%20and%20Safety/Calm%20A%20Crying%20Baby/Make-a-Plan-editible2015.pdf
Carter's story :
I can only imagine what Carter's life was like the first year . The pain, how scared he felt, if he was hungry or cold ?? It hurts my heart when I think about it.
Aside from being shaken by his biological dad he was neglected by his biological mother after his injury. Here is Carter's story :
If I Could Talk I Would Tell You...
That I am Carter, a SURVIVOR of Shaken Baby Syndrome !!
When I was a tiny 5 week old baby on October 24, 2009, my biological dad became angry at me for crying. He shook me violently and threw me against a wall. As a result I had a serious brain injury, retinal bleeding in both eyes (leaving me legally blind), a broken clavicle and swelling and bruises to my face. I spent almost a month in the intensive care unit - I was very sick . The doctors told my family I would need a lot of special care the rest of my life . My dad was in big trouble for hurting me and was sentenced to prison for 32 years . It came out that I had been shaken many times before he really hurt me . DHS placed me in foster care because my biological mom was not taking good care of me after I was injured - not very good care at all. I lived with a new family but things weren't so good there either . I wasn't gaining weight and my day care was very concerned about me - a lot of people were I guess . When DHS finally came to take me to another home I was found on the floor laying in animal waste . I didn't like it very much there .
This time I went to a really nice family but just until a permanent home was found for me . In January 2011, I had a new home to go to . The Fowler's house . My new mommy seemed very excited to meet me . She held me a lot and gave me lots of hugs and kisses . So did my new dad . I had two new brothers and two new sisters . I felt safe and loved in my new home right away . I was very sick the first few months at my new home but my family never left me alone when I had to go to the hospital . One day I choked because of the bad reflux I have. I then had a seizure not long after I choked and I stopped breathing . My mom had to do CPR on me and I remember my mommy crying so hard at the hospital . I had to fly in an airplane to a big hospital and stay there til I was all better . My mom was with me the whole time . The doctors told my new family I probably wouldn't live very much longer but that didn't stop them from loving me . Slowly I got better and was actually making a lot of progress- I surprised my doctors . I started going to a special daycare while mommy and daddy worked. I get all of my therapies at my new daycare . I take speech, physical, occupational and vision therapy several times each week . I got stronger and grew bigger and even healthier . I was getting sick less often and spent less time in the hospital .
Oh yea, my mom still kisses me and tells me I am her brave boy everyday - that makes me very happy. My mom told me I can do all kinds of things - she told me to be patient and never ever give up . I really love my mom and dad and family - they simply loved me back to life .
In March 2013, I became a Fowler for ever . I was so happy and I know my mom and dad were too . I have a forever family and am so excited.
I still require a lot of care. I have cerebral palsy bc of the lack of oxygen from when I was injured . I cant do anything for myself. My arms and legs don't work like they are supposed to . I have such bad reflux I choke almost everyday . Sometime just a little bit and other times I get so choked I get very scared . My mom and dad are so nice to help me and it doesn't scare me as bad when they hold my hand and say sweet things to me. I have a special tube that feeds me through my stomach . I have to be hooked up to a feeding pump about 16 hours each day . I am legally blind but I love to look at the light . I hurt a lot from painful spasms mostly in my legs . I take a lot of medicine several times a day to help me. That's a lot for a little guy like me to deal with everyday . Don't you agree ?
But, I still enjoy life just in different ways . I love to giggle at funny sounds . I love to have people talk to me and play with me . I am 4 years old now. I am doing better than ever . I will always be injured because of what my bio dad did to me but I try very hard to accomplish new things all the time .
I wish I could do more and be like other kids but I can't because of a terrible thing called Shaken Baby Syndrome . I wish adults would learn from what happened to me and other babies and kids would not have to go through this too . My Uncle Larry and Aunt Danielle wanted to do something very special for me to prevent more babies and kids suffering like I do. Uncle Larry went before legislatures and is responsible for getting Carter's Law passed in Arkansas. One aspect of this law will educate others on the dangers of SBS and normal crying periods for babies.
My mom is trying hard to make people aware of the dangers of shaking a baby .
Did you know that it takes as little as 3 seconds to injure a baby forever or they can even die from this ? That is pretty scary . Please SHARE this post and help us educate people on SBS. Thank you very much.
Love and Hugs,
Carter
www.facebook.com/carterslawlovemedontshakeme
Update :
Carter wears glasses now . The ophthalmologist says he is still legally blind but with cortical vision impairment there is a chance the vision will improve . We are praying for that daily .
He smiles and looks around with his glasses on. I know he sees something, just not sure what .❤️
Diane, Carter's mom
