09/26/2026
‘I HATE MY FATHER, BUT WHY?’
The other day on our Command Your Morning broadcast, I talked about resentment from a biblical lens. Someone brought up how their mother never spoke negatively about her father, even though he wasn’t fully present.
I shared that we have to be careful about the things we say in front of our children. I broke down the Greek definition of each word related to anger in Ephesians 4:31. I shared that a child’s premature brain cannot handle certain conversations, especially those conversations that put down the absent parent.
Many people have PROGRAMMED their children to hate others, including their parent, by what they have said. I shared that the absent parent is wounding the child by not being present. But the custodial parent can wound the child with their bitterness.
There are children who have developed issues with anger, not because they were physically abused. Some developed issues with anger because their parent expressed the resentment they’ve been carrying in front of them. What they’ve heard you repeat has become their language. The pain of the parent becomes the pain of the child.
Dash Hudson states in the link I share below, as he refers to the mother and son: “Your emotions toward the father is one thing. Your son’s relationship to his father is another. Be careful that your pain does not become his perspective.”
Whether the mother is allowing her pain to have power or the father is expressing his displeasure with the mom, that child is going to feel the effects because they are constantly absorbing what they hear.
What Mr. Hudson shared in the following link titled, “I Hate My Father, But Why?”, is a real eye-opener. I hope you can open it. And if you can, share it with a friend who is struggling to forgive their child’s absent parent. If you can’t, invest in the book ‘When the Little Boy Is Healed, the Man Will Show Up’. It’s helpful for anyone who will take time to read. Especially those still holding on to past wounds from childhood trauma or painful relationship experiences.
Ephesians 4:31 tells believers, “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice…”
Ephesians 4:32 tells us. “And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.”
In other words, LET GO of the negative and embrace Christlike responses.
Have a blessed day. YOU ARE VICTORIOUS!!
~ Renae Sellers, Certified Anger Management Specialist and Parenting Educator
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