Love Lead Inspire

In a culture of comparison, it’s so easy to get wrapped up in what you don’t have… and what everyone else does.

“Must be nice.”

We hear it all the time.
Maybe we even say it ourselves.
(I know I have.)

But when we focus on lack instead of abundance, it becomes a roadblock.

Because when you’re constantly focused on what’s missing, you stop seeing all that’s already present.

“Must be nice.”

A trip.
A house.
A relationship.
A body.
A business.
A life that looks easier, freer, happier.

No matter where you are in life, there will always be someone who has something you wish you had.

But here’s the beautiful part:
Someone else is looking at your life thinking the exact same thing.

What really shifted things for me was changing my response from:
“Must be nice…”
to:
“That is so nice for them.”

“That makes me happy that they get to experience that.”
“They worked hard for that.”
“They are worthy and deserving of good things.”

And you know what?

Me too.
I am worthy and deserving of good things.

And so are you.
You are worthy and deserving of good things.

Jealousy can either keep us stuck in lack…
or become an invitation into possibility.

An invitation to dream bigger.
To take action.
To believe more is available for you, too.

So instead of focusing on what you don’t have, focus on what you do have.
Focus on what’s already beautiful.
Focus on what’s already blooming.

And then ask yourself:
What do I want?
And how am I going to get there?

That tiny shift changes everything.

Land of the Free
Because of the Brave
Today, and every day, we honor and remember those who served.
🙏 🇺🇸 🫶

This week I found myself caught in a small tornado of:
“Am I doing enough?”
“Am I valuable?”
“Am I worthy?”

Old ways creep in from time to time.
That’s part of healing.
Part of growth.
Part of learning new tools.

So instead of shaming those old patterns, I try to thank them.
They’re showing me where I still need love, awareness, and softness.

At the beginning of last year, I set new priorities:

1. Me
2. My family
3. Work

And honestly?
That was a huge shift for me.

Because deep down, work had always been first.

Not necessarily because I loved hustle…
but because I was driven by people pleasing, validation, fear of failure, and the need to feel “enough.”

I normalized being constantly available.
Constantly productive.
Constantly “on.”

Answering messages immediately.
Clearing notifications like my worth depended on it.
Trying to hold everything together while quietly running on empty.

And from the outside?
It probably looked like I had it all together.

The lipstick.
The cute shoes.
The happy clients.
The awards.
The reputation.

But internally?
I was craving connection.
To myself.
To my husband.
To my son.
To my life.

I realized I didn’t want to build a successful life while feeling disconnected from the people inside of it.

So now, when those old thoughts creep in, I pause and ask:
“Am I connected to what actually matters right now?”

That question has changed me more than hustle ever did.

I used to max out my time.
I’m so efficient.

Or so I thought.

I used to squeeze in as much as I could. Then leave late, daring myself to get stuck in traffic, hit red lights, and inevitably be late to pick up my son from school. Sprinkle in some road rage and self deprecating talk, all the while my blood pressure rises and the flight or flight mode is activated.

What did this habit boil down to?

A recipe for shame. Shame in how I treat others. Shame in how I treat myself and shame in my wrecked nervous system.

Why couldn’t the last 10-15-20 minutes of work wait? Did it make that big of a difference?

Maybe. Maybe not.

Here’s what I know: my worth and value was rolled up into my Ta-Done list and others’ approval.

I did it!
Be proud of me.
I’m worthy now.
I’ve earned the right to stop working now.

Mind you- this is something I adopted in my first job out of college: Stay late. Seek validation.

She’s reliable.
She will say yes.
She’s committed.
She’s a good employee.
She’s worthy.

I practiced it for years.
And it took months and months and months to unravel that and be ok in a slower paced world. 🌎 🙏 ☮️

Drop a 🏎️ if the self-inflicted races sounds like you

Let’s create something different together that allows you to:

✨ Wake up knowing you’re worthy
✨ Calm your nerves
✨ Focus on presence, joy and possibility

Drop a 🙌 if you’re ready to create something different

A week ago I celebrated my 44 birthday outside surrounded by the trees, sunshine, two of my dearest friends, and a bird symphony. ☀️🌳🐦‍⬛

Is it just me, or are we all enjoying bird watching a little bit more than we anticipated???

I baked myself a sprinkle bread - because yes, I fell into the sourdough clerb and I just love every bit of the baking process… but more on that later. 🥖

I’m coming into this season with contentment, or what my yogi friends call Santosha. ☮️

My blessings are abundant. My life is full of love, and joy and peace. ❤️

According to the World Wide Web, turning 4️⃣4️⃣ is viewed as a time of mastering your own path, leaving behind limiting beliefs, and stepping confidently into your most authentic self - which is the coolest because that is part of the process we work through in the BYOB program - Be Your Own Bestie.

It is one of my greatest gifts 🎁 to work with women as they shed their old ways of thinking and dip their toes into possibility while discovering their own magic. 🪄

So thank you for being here.
Thank you for the follows.
Thank you for the likes.
Thank you for the comments
Thank you for the shares.
And a special thank you to the women I work with one-on-one. You’ve already made this year extra special. 🎂

Thank you Big Shell for the glamour shot 💋 📸

So often in coaching, we begin with shifting our perspective

Shifting our perspective by starting with the DREAM
The ideal place you want to be

Not the should’s
Not the how’s
Not the logistics
- we work through those later.

Just straight dreaming, tell me all your dreams. I want all the juicy details- so many details that we can both literally see them, touch them, taste them.

Because 1/2 of the battle sometimes is actually believing it is possible and but IF you can see it in your mind…. Boom we have an in.

You see, the brain doesn’t know the difference between fact or fiction my friend.

So…
🎶 Come with me
and you’ll be
in a world of pure imagination … 🎶

PS G man read Charlie and the Chocolate Factory this year so we’ve been singing Pure Imagination on repeat which is equal parts endearing and annoying since I can’t get it out of my head. 😆







📸 at the best co-working joint in town

Hypothetically, if stillness is perfect right now… what might that look like?

Deep belly breaths
Cleansing exhales
Rest
Processing
Releasing
Clarity
Creativity
Restoring
Peace
Healing
Happiness
Rejuvenation
Inspiration and motivation
Excitement
Passion
Direction
Confidence

And that’s just the beginning…
Need I say more?

What if stillness is perfect right now?

What if you weren’t working towards a goal or manifesting this and that?

What if you aren’t trying to get something bigger and better?

What if you truly and honestly felt OK being here, just as you are with no title, no box to check, no promotion on the way, no acknowledgment?

Just everything as is?

No more learning, no more classes.

No more trying to beat your last time.

And what if you didn’t have the fear of becoming lazy or unmotivated?

What if you are just present in your life with a regulated nervous system?

What if you are still?

What if ALL THAT is what is perfect for right now?

Stay tuned for part ✌️

Are you a people pleaser?

Do you need to join my ten step program?

All jokes aside. There are benefits of being a people pleaser.

- Lots of opportunities for you to show up in the worlds to do things for others.

-People love you!

… Because they can rely on you.
… Because you never say no.

But wait, that last one is not an advantage for you…

🤔

The Disadvantages come in real strong.

-People take advantage of you.
Because you don’t say no or set bounderies.

-Do people like me? Are they going to be mad? Constant worry.

You are
Overwhelmed
Overstimulated
On edge. Irritable and short tempered.
Your nervous system is wrecked.
You have trouble relaxing and resting, partially because you don’t feel like you have time to or you don’t feel like you deserve it since your list is so long.

You don’t say no, so consequently you don’t have time to rest and recharge. Aka you don’t have time for you. Heck you don’t have time for spontenaity. You don’t have time for mistakes or traffic jams or for Amazon to tell you your next day delivery has been pushed back. Because every minute is filled.

You always feel like you are in charge of everything and everyone. That never ends.

So Ash, that the heck do I do??? I feel out of control.

Well friend, you probably are and quite frankly, you might be attracting it...

But fret not, because there are ways and tools for reversing this.

Coming straight from a recovering people pleaser myself.

And let me show you what’s on the other side of recovery ❤️‍🩹 - which btw isn’t a one and done perfect scenario.

- Deep restful sleep
- Spontaneity and room for adventure
- More room for activities (if you will)
- Presence
- Closer, more loving and respectful relationships
- Love and respect for yourself
- Clarity
- Joy
- A regulated nervous system

The list goes on and on.

If you want to learn more, let your hair down, put on your flower sunglasses and send me a DM. ☎️ 💋

This last week I had the honor of co-teaching Full Moon Flow + Restore with one of my dearest during the pink moon so we base our intention on the meaning and spirit behind it.

And I wanted to share a little bit of that here.

The pink moon symbolizes the first blooms of spring- also called the phlox moon after the moss phlox which graces the ground with delicate pink blooms that signal it’s time for rebirth, blooming and releasing.

For weeks I’ve admired the dainty delicate flowers of the phlox and the flowering trees in our yard.

They were hit by frozen temperatures, crazy winds and loads of rain. Yet, they perked back up each time.

And that’s been our year so far friends, our beautiful souls have gone through it. Yet we hold tight and still show up brightening the world, embracing the day, showing our kids, our families, our friends and ourselves that we are stronger than we think…

We dance in the wind.
We drink in the rain.
We sparkle in the sun.
We embrace the winter and the roller coaster of the unexpected.
We trust in our roots, buried deep in the earth, steady and true.
We hold strong to our branches and release when we are ready.

So as the pink moon energy embraces us this week, bringing renewal and blossoming new energy, step into your courage to release what no longer serves you, grow into your potential and embody the gentle confidence in the unfolding.