Lori Horstman, LLC.

Lori Horstman, LLC. Certified Dementia Specialist/Consultant
I train/educate regarding Dementia Care & understanding.

08/20/2026

Your loved one with dementia may not remember exactly what you said… but their brain is paying very close attention to HOW you said it.

Here’s something I want every dementia caregiver to understand:

Your mood enters the room before your words do.

A person living with dementia may have difficulty processing language, but they can still pick up on your facial expression, tone of voice, posture, pace, and emotional energy.

So when we're rushed, frustrated, tense, or anxious even when we're trying desperately not to show it our body may be communicating:

⚠️ Something is wrong.

And if their brain can't figure out why something feels wrong, that uncertainty can contribute to fear, resistance, or agitation.

So before your next difficult interaction, try this:

Check yourself before you approach.

Drop your shoulders.
Unclench your jaw.
Soften your face.
Slow your voice.
Then approach.

Sometimes the first dementia communication technique we need isn't changing their behavior.

It's becoming more aware of what our own body is communicating.

And if you're thinking, “This makes sense, but I need help figuring out what to do in MY situation,” that's exactly why I offer Caregiver Coaching Sessions.

We can look at the situations you're struggling with, help you better understand what the dementia brain may be communicating, and build practical strategies you can actually use at home.

💙 You don't need another generic list of dementia tips. You need tools that fit the person you love and the challenges you're actually facing.

👉 Visit my website to learn more and schedule a Caregiver Coaching Session.

When we understand the brain, we can change the way we approach the moment.

08/20/2026

Your mood enters the room before your words do.

When you're stressed, frustrated, or rushing, your loved one with dementia may pick up on it before you've said a single word.

And here's the hard part: their nervous system may respond to yours.

So before you walk into a difficult moment, reset YOUR brain first.

Pause. Drop your shoulders. Unclench your jaw. Take one slow breath with a longer exhale.

You're helping quiet your brain's alarm system so your prefrontal cortex, the part you need for patience, problem-solving, and good decisions can do its job.

Sometimes the first person we need to calm is ourselves.

Struggling to make this work in your real-life caregiving situations?

👉 Book a Personalized Caregiver Coaching Session on my website. Let's build strategies around your loved one and your challenges.

08/17/2026

“But I play my favorite brain game EVERY day. Isn’t that working out my brain?”

Well..... there’s a catch.

Your brain LOVES getting good at things. The more often you play the same game, the more efficient your brain becomes at doing that particular task.

And efficiency is great but brain training needs challenge, too.

Think about your physical workout. If you lifted the exact same 5-pound weight every day for years, eventually your muscles would say, “Oh, this again? We've got this.” 😄

Your brain is similar.

Give your brain something it isn't expecting.

🧠 Learn something new.
🧠 Change your strategy.
🧠 Try a different kind of challenge.
🧠 Work your memory, attention, language, coordination, and problem-solving in different ways.

Because here's the difference I want you to remember:

Keeping your brain busy isn't the same as TRAINING your brain.

Your brain needs novelty, challenge, and practice to keep adapting.

And if you're thinking, “Okay Lori, but HOW do I actually train my brain?”...

I've got you. 😉

🎉 BRAIN BOOT CAMP STARTS SEPTEMBER 14TH!

We're going beyond puzzles and brain games to learn what the science tells us about protecting our brains and, most importantly, how to turn that knowledge into habits we can actually use.

🧠 Don't just exercise your brain. Learn how to TRAIN it.

👉 Join me for Brain Boot Camp beginning September 14th!

08/16/2026

🧠 Ever feel like your brain is DONE… but the day isn't?

That mental exhaustion isn't always because you've worked too hard.

Sometimes you've simply made too many decisions.

What to answer. What to eat. What to do first. What can wait. What needs your attention next.

Your brain's executive systems have been making decisions ALL DAY and eventually, the quality of those decisions can suffer.

Try this:

Tomorrow morning, eliminate 3 unnecessary decisions.

Lay out your clothes. Plan your lunch. Write down your top priority the night before.

Save some of that mental energy for the decisions that actually matter.

🧠 Brain health isn't only about exercising your brain. It's about learning how to USE it better.

Want to know what else your brain has been trying to tell you?

Brain Boot Camp starts September 14th!
👉 Visit my website to grab your spot.

08/13/2026

Have you ever heard someone say...

"She's just doing it for attention."

Or...

"He's trying to manipulate me."

Can I lovingly challenge that idea?

Most of the time... that's not what's happening at all. Your loved one isn't giving you a hard time...They're having a hard time.

Here's what dementia does.
As the brain changes, it becomes harder to find the right words, solve problems, and make sense of what's happening.

So instead of saying,
"I'm frightened."
"I'm overwhelmed."
"I'm in pain."
Or...
"I don't understand."

The brain communicates the only way it can...Through behavior.
That behavior might look like agitation.
Pacing.
Refusing care.
Yelling.
Or asking the same question over and over.

The next time you see agitation, don't ask yourself,
"How do I stop this behavior?"
Instead ask,
"What is my loved one trying to tell me that they can no longer put into words?"

That one question changes everything. It shifts you from frustration...To curiosity.
From reacting...To understanding. And that's where better caregiving begins.

If you'd like to learn more practical strategies for understanding dementia behaviors, I'd love to have you join us at my monthly Dementia Caregiver Support Group.

Once you understand what the behavior is communicating...You stop taking it personally...And you start responding with confidence and compassion.

08/13/2026

When someone living with dementia says, “No,” it doesn’t always mean, “I will never do this.”

It may mean:

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m afraid.”

“You’re moving too fast.”

“I don’t recognize what you’re asking me to do.”

Instead of pushing harder, pause and change the approach.

Validate first: “You’re not ready right now.”

Then offer two simple choices: “Would you like the blue shirt or the green one?”

Sometimes cooperation returns when the person feels heard and regains a small sense of control.

The goal is not to overpower resistance. It is to discover what the resistance is communicating.

Personalized caregiver coaching helps you turn difficult daily moments into workable strategies.

08/10/2026

Have you ever said something in frustration and immediately thought...

"Why did I do that?"

Or tried to solve a problem when you were upset, only to make it worse?

That's because your brain wasn't thinking...It was reacting.

Here's the neuroscience behind it. When your emotions become intense, your brain shifts resources away from your prefrontal cortex—the part of your brain responsible for focus, decision-making, and clear thinking.

In other words...Big emotions can derail your attention.

And if your attention is derailed...Your thinking usually follows.

The next time you feel yourself getting overwhelmed, try this before you react.

Pause.
Take one slow breath.
Now ask yourself,
"What am I feeling right now?"

Just naming the emotion—"I'm frustrated." "I'm anxious." "I'm overwhelmed."—helps quiet your brain's emotional alarm system and brings your thinking brain back online.

It takes less than 30 seconds.

At Brain Boot Camp, I teach simple techniques like this to help you strengthen your attention, manage stress, and train your brain to respond instead of react.

A healthier brain isn't the one that never gets emotional...
It's the one that knows how to find its way back online.

08/09/2026

Doing the same crossword every morning may be enjoyable—and there is value in doing something you enjoy.

But if you want to challenge your brain, it also needs novelty, effort and gradual progression.

Try a familiar activity in an unfamiliar way:

Learn five words in another language.
Follow a new recipe without rushing.
Take a different walking route and notice landmarks.
Learn a new rhythm, dance step or phone feature.

The goal isn’t to be instantly good at it.

That moment when you have to stop, concentrate and try again? That is the work.

Your brain changes in response to what you repeatedly ask it to do.

Inside Brain Boot Camp, we help you move beyond “staying busy” and begin training your brain with purpose.

08/06/2026

When someone living with dementia says no, don’t immediately push harder.

“No” does not always mean, “I refuse.”

It might mean, “I don’t understand what you want.” It might mean, “I’m afraid.” Or, “You’re moving too fast and my brain can’t catch up.”

If you respond with, “But you have to take a shower,” you may end up in a power struggle that neither of you can win.

Try this instead.
First, validate: “You’re not ready right now. That’s okay.”
Pause and allow the emotion to come down.
Then change the approach and offer two simple choices:
“Would you like to wash your face first or brush your teeth?”

You are helping the person regain a sense of control without abandoning the task completely. And sometimes the best strategy is to step away, reset, and try again later.

Dementia changes reasoning, language and the ability to process what is happening—but the need to feel respected remains.

If daily care has become a battle in your home, personalized caregiver coaching can help you understand the resistance and develop a better approach. Visit my website to learn more.

08/06/2026

Agitation is not simply “bad behavior,” and it usually isn’t attention-seeking.

It is information.

The person may be in pain, frightened, overstimulated, hungry, tired, confused, or unable to tell you what feels wrong.

Before trying to correct the behavior, lower the temperature of the moment:

Lower your voice.
Slow your movements.
Reduce the number of people talking.
Ask yourself, “What might this person need?”

You do not have to win the moment.

You need to help the brain feel safe enough to move through it.

If agitation has become a repeated pattern in your home, personalized caregiver coaching can help you look beneath the behavior and build a plan that fits your loved one.

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Springboro, OH
45066

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+19375453339

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