Jill Monaco

Asking Jesus questions is part of what I do in my coaching practice and what I teach when training Christian Coaches in the Freedom Framework.

I call it Conversational Prayer.

We can ask Him about the hard stuff and all the concerns of our heart and truly hear from Him. Everyone communicates differently and that’s what makes it so personal. More than answers, you get to encounter His presence.

If you’d like to experience it for yourself I’m offering summer sessions at a discount. DM me.

Anyone else? Or is it just me?

The real enemy revealed himself over the last couple of weeks. He is alive and well in the Church.

The comment sections of posts across the internet were hateful, mocking, swearing, condescending, belittling, and misogynistic. By the people in the pews and the pastors on the platform. It's spiritual abuse.

This is not a post to debate, but to collectively grieve what is going on in the hearts of people across our nation.

This is not an attack on the Southern Baptist Convention, but an alarm for ALL leaders. This is happening behind the scenes from people in OUR churches.

This should bring extreme sorrow to every believer ...

"Out of the heart the mouth speaks." Luke 6:45

Link to Substack post in comments.

Update: This isn't a post objecting to SBC in any way. It's about the comment section of posts. So any off-topic comments or debating interpretations will be deleted.

I’m seeing so much of this lately from christians in leadership in the comment sections of controversial posts. 🤦‍♀️

Keeping the atmosphere light because joy is a fruit of the spirit!

I coach and minister in the heavy topics. I love being able to see Gods love and truth create transformation. One thing people who have suffered a long time need to be intentional about is fun and laughter. Even during current negative circumstances. Science and faith support this. Laughter is good medicine. Fun lowers cortisol.

So after a very intense two weeks of hearing opinions from people and supporting women regarding the new SBC amendment, I thought I’d poke fun at myself. I made this on chat and it just cracks me up. My humor isn’t for everyone … but gosh I think people would be better off if it was!

❤️❤️❤️

I’ve turned off commenting on my posts about the SBC.

I appreciate the healthy conversations, and I thank everyone for contributing. I'm doing this because some comments were attacking each other or being unkind at an increasing rate. I didn’t want to dismiss anyone by removing their comments, but it also didn’t feel like healthy discourse anymore.

Based on some feedback, I want to say I had no intention to cause division in the body of Christ. I know where people misunderstood my heart, intentions, and words. That is the risk we take in being vocal on social media.

I will continue to post and write about how to encounter God's presence and find freedom in Christ. I will be an advocate for victims of spiritual and physical abuse. I pray my ministry inspires you to love God and love others.

Much love,
Jill

P.S. I turned off comments here because some were continuing in the unhealthy pattern. Thanks for understanding.

For those who think I have nefarious motives. I wish my social media were monetized. I'd be able to pay for the medical bills from being hit by the Bible so many times this week by Christians. 😂

I'm not some rogue and uneducated woman. I've been in vocational ministry for decades. I researched Scripture because I wanted to understand both sides of the women in ministry conversation, how they interpreted the controversial verses, and how they reached different conclusions. I find that really intellectually stimulating. I am enjoying some of the comments on my posts over the last week and learning from others about this topic.

Let's keep it civil, people... lots of scholarly MEN from other denominations disagree with the new SBC amendment that bars women from serving as pastors. I'm not that important, and my reach is small... I won't be destroying Christianity anytime soon with my research or opinion.

After all, we will spend eternity together. 🙂

For your entertainment: a photo of me speaking to men and women at a church.

It’s simple.

If slave owners voted to keep slaves and the slaves had no voice in the matter, would that be just? (That was fought over in the Civil War, and the 13th Amendment was passed in 1865.)

If white men voted to rule over all other races, and the other races had no voice in the matter, would that be just? (That was legally resolved for black men with the 15th Amendment in 1870, although it took society much longer to catch up--Voting Rights Act of 1965.)

If Christian men voted to hold back the gifts and callings of Christian women and women had no voice in the matter, would that be just? (That just happened, in 2026, with the Southern Baptist Convention.) Note: women could serve as messengers and vote in their church, but only with the permission of their male pastor. Hummm…. Were they really free to vote no or be educated on the subject? My point is that mostly men voted on something that would impact all women. From the reporting of those who were in attendance there was barely a discussion.

The people benefiting from the law, rule, or Amendment cannot be the only ones voting on it- it’s a conflict of interest. I mean, it's common sense. We can see it now, looking back in history on other matters. Which is why I made the comparison.

The SBC voted today and passed the ironically named "Truth and Unity Amendment," which keeps women from holding the title of or "functioning as a pastor." Specifically to the assembled congregation. But Al Mohler interprets that to also include women speaking on podcasts. This is where I stand up and say, “red flag!” Not because I disagree with Scripture but because of how vague the language is. Function could mean anything.

The word "pastor" is used only once in all of Scripture, but 17 other times translated as "shepherd." It’s never an “office.” It was never once aligned to be only for men. The functions of pastors are also not limited to men, as the gifts of the Spirit are for everyone, as the Holy Spirit wills. (I Cor 12) And the work of spreading the Gospel was assigned to everyone. Not to mention, we have many examples of women functioning as pastors/shepherds in the NT.

A pastor is different from an elder/overseer. Those are different Greek words and functions. That seems to be just an office for men. I know there is a divide about this but that’s not why I’m writing this. I’m focused on the function of pastor. But I address it because the amendment uses all three words together. I share more about these details in my Substack post. (It's free)

Is it right that any regulation, law, rule, or judgment benefits one race or gender over the other? No. The male and female brains are the same marvelous creation designed in God's image. It's sad to me that the secular world is more in line with God's design than one of the largest Christian denominations. Truly, I'm grieved.

With this vaguely worded amendment there is a risk of corruption. Jesus knew this. In Matthew 20:25-28, Jesus contrasts the world's power-hungry leadership with the servant-heartedness expected of His followers. He teaches that in His kingdom, true greatness and leadership are measured by humility and a willingness to serve others, rather than by lording authority over them.

"Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.""

Most people I know believe if we take a verse out of its cultural context and apply it universally to today, it's reckless. We must look at the totality of Scripture (culture, intended audience, original Greek word(s), context, other verses or examples that seem to oppose our modern English translations or interpretations). We need to do that with “pastors.”

I'm not an SBC member, so why do I care? Because those who are in the SBC and attend these churches are also leading in education, politics, health care ... they are influenced and informed by their religious views. It does leak out into all other sectors of society. This is a slippery slope. And it is a view held by other churches outside of the SBC. This impacts women in ministry who feel called to function as pastors.

Plus, as I've said in previous posts, I'm an advocate for victims of spiritual abuse, and this move raises other concerns, especially since the leaders of the SBC have recently said they think the abuse crisis is a hoax and talking about it distracts from their mission. I know women need women to function as pastors in this area. I hope men can understand why a man in leadership doesn't feel safe for them to get any kind of pastoral help. Most of the women I know do not desire a title, so it's less about title and more about function.

But okay, SBC, so you made your decision. Where does it go from here? I know you honor women and their gifting. But by your own declaration, and as it’s open to interpretation, do you now need to hire a lot of male pastors and find many male volunteers? Children's ministry, women's ministry, care ministry, counseling ministry, and any other role where women have been shepherding or caring for the sheep. You can't just take the title and give them something else, like "director" or "head volunteer." The Truth and Unity Amendment potentially keeps them "functioning as pastors" as well -- from "preaching to the assembled congregation." (What is that exactly?) Personally, I wish it had more specifics and clarity because it's vague enough to be misapplied.

I love the body of Christ, the Church, and God's Word. Yet, I remain concerned and grieved.

Healthy conversation is encouraged, and un-Christian-like comments will be removed.

Update: I recently read a criticism of my thought process here, and as someone who wants to be teachable, I want to acknowledge how this post was perceived in ways that don't align with my heart or beliefs. Im not comparing the SBC to slave owners, but I can see how people who are sensitive to that issue see it that way. I left it in this post for the purpose of transparency. I believe our different opinions are a difference in interpretation of Scripture. I honor the conviction of those who believe they are supporting God's Word with this vote. I happen to disagree, and in that ... I support my brothers and sisters in Christ to be who God called them to be.