Spiritual Life of Babies

Last week I attended a beautiful home birth of a third time mama.
I wouldn’t insult her by saying it was easy because it was labor and a lot of work.
It was very different than her first time. Start to finish, five hours.
There is more trust and patience with the terrain. Multip. moms have proof they can walk through the “fire” and survive. You are over the shock and magnitude of the journey you experienced at your first birth. I have a lot of compassion for first time moms, and first babies. The first born takes the “hit”.

Birth can be a shocking.

You’ll spend months reading or seeing about other people‘s births, collecting as much information as you can so you can feel “ready”.

There is no “ready” really.
Acceptance will serve you best.
The mystery must be lived.
All you can know is it will change you.

It turns you into a warrior over night.

I had no idea my body could do all of that and it wasn’t in the books.

There is no perfect birth. There are some easier than others. Those had flexibility, patience, and acceptance in the mix.
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The first six weeks of postpartum you will be hypervigilant. This is nature‘s way to ensure the survival of your baby. It doesn’t mean there is a literal tiger around the corner.
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Take a breath for yourself. You are not going to die. Many women feel that they may be on the verge of dying during labor. That is the death of the maiden.
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You’re only a first time mom once. Find mom friends that have done it multiple times. Your maiden needs to see what she turns into. That she will be safe and magnificent. 🌿

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“Sufi! I adore you!! I have to tell you, we had a reading a couple months back and you said my son was breech and just had an ultrasound at 32 weeks and he is breech! Is there anything I can do or say to him to help him move?!”
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Awhile back I had another client who also was breech and they tried everything to turn baby. 🥨 suggested I recommend mother and father writing a letter to baby about how they felt becoming new parents. They did and the next day baby turned. 👏👏👏
It’s worth a try.
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I am essentially on call now for three births. Three girls coming in!👏⚡️💖
The most unusual tool in my doula bag has to be the “Maryam flower”.
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During a pregnancy reading for my birth client the word “Fatima” kept coming up. It turns out it’s the Turkish name for an herb her father was bringing for her. We are Turkish and this herb is commonly used in the rural areas of Turkiye by midwives.
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“The Flower of Maryam or “Fatima Flower” (Anastatica hierochuntica) is a small shrub collected across North Africa, Saudi Arabia, Iran, and Pakistan, and among its most popular medicinal uses is its application for childbirth. Whether its medicinal properties encourage dilation, or if it’s a powerful visualization tool for mothers, traditional midwives have used the Flower of Maryam with their laboring mothers for hundreds of years. A quick glance at its names (below) suggests its religious significance: it is referred to as the “leaf of Maryam” (mother of Jesus), the “hand of Fatima” (daughter of the Prophet ﷺ), as well as simply “daughter of the Prophet ﷺ,” and “resurrection plant.”
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Anastatica is notable for its ability to survive in arid conditions—it simply dries up into a ball and awaits the next rain, at which point it reveals small slender leaves and tiny white flowers. It is hygroscopic; its branches immediately reconstitute in the presence of water. It is picked (leaves, woody parts, and seeds)….
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As a medicinal preparation, it is reconstituted in water and taken internally for colds, as an emmenagogue (to bring on menstruation), for epilepsy, uterine hemorrhage, and to bring pain relief and support for childbirth. In some places, it is burned as an incense during labor. It is also used medicinally in countries where it does not grow; in Malaysia, it is commonly used for childbirth…”
To learn more go to www.baraka.com
wish me luck and these mamas happy pushing. There are often themes or patterns with birth. Often in a pattern of three. I adore that there are three girls on their way.
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Thank you K. Friedlander for this share.
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Always consult your doctor or midwife before taking any supplement.
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I will soon be on- call for many months after months of not being on call.

It’s a lot of pressure to be on-call for someone’s most precious moment of their whole life.
It is also a great honor!
as I felt the weight of my doula crown, I heard the babies not yet born whisper, “ We are going to have so much fun!”
I felt a splash of joy, love, encouragement, and full unfettered happiness!
Then I felt gratitude.
How lucky am I that I get to spend time with these beautiful starlings and their families!
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Thank you for the “whispers” and the splashes of joy sparkles, glitter, and loves little ones.
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Happy pushing mama’s!

A recent post I saw stated we are the only mammals that birth outside of the home, with strangers, in a strange place, meaning the hospital.
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We are not the only mammals that do this. Cats are known to choose unusual locations to give birth.
Cats aside….
Is birthing elsewhere a modern era affliction?
In Nepal and Tibet there has been a movement away from old birth practices. A movement to allow women to birth in their homes without stigma. It was considered bad luck to birth in the home. Thank you One Heart Worldwide for making change there. Women in remote villages have little choice or access to any hospital nearby.
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In Turkiye when I spoke with women about their births many asked, “Why do American women want to birth like animals?”
The C section for this upper class set was the more civilized way to go. I love a good free birth when all goes well. Above all I love women having choice. American women get to birth like animals because we have…..
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Luck and privilege.
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We are lucky because we have the great privilege of choice.
Most of the world does not.
There are women who walk days to get to a hospital.
Hospitals did not spring up out of nowhere for no reason.
In the 1800s it was common place for families to prepare for a funeral while preparing for a birth.
we’ve had the privilege of forgetting those statistics. The tragic loss of women and babies.
Is there room for improvement with the hospital system?
Absolutely!
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I have lived in many of the cultures that birth workers love to taut as the best! The fantasy or ideal is not always true.
It most often is not.
Don’t get caught up in ideals and fantasy when it comes to birth.
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Understand what’s best for you, who and how you are, and go from there.
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Happy pushing!
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If ever I am tired or want to give up I will think of Martha.
July 6, 1936, Route 66, New Mexico. This is Martha Evans, 32. She had been walking for three days. Her husband died of tuberculosis in Oklahoma in May. The farm was foreclosed. She took the six kids and a Radio Flyer wagon and started west for California. The twins in the wagon were 11 months old. The boys walking were 6, 5, 4, and 3. Her dress was torn on barbed wire. Her leg was cut and infected. She wrapped it with a feed sack. She had $1.60 in her pocket. A photographer from the Resettlement Administration saw them and pulled over. He offered her a ride. She said no. She said if she took a ride now, the kids would expect one every time they were tired. She gave him her name and kept walking. The photo ran in newspapers across the country. Donations came to a PO box in Barstow. She got $200 and a bus ticket. She made it to Bakersfield and picked grapes. All six kids lived. Three went to college. Martha died in 1978. The wagon is in the Smithsonian.

“Twenty or so years ago my friend Iva’s grandmother lost her diamond engagement ring while farming/gardening on her family’s land near Armena (Camrose), Alberta, Canada. After many tears and hours of searching, she never did find the ring. In the end, she used her own hard earned money to replace the ring and never told her Husband!
Iva recently built a house on a portion of this family farm land. This garden has been feeding the family for years, but this year it had a special gift for them.
Guess what happened when Iva’s family went to harvest some of the garden last night?!? 😳”
Grandma’s secrets are safe with mother earth no more!
The “carrot ring” has been returned to Iva’s Grandma as of this morning (Aug 15, 2017) she is very happy to have the original ring her late husband proposed to her with.”
Appy Acres
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When I was riding, I knew I should not wear my mother-in-law‘s watch. I didn’t wanna take it off because I missed her. While we were galloping somehow it I was sure it was gone forever. I asked my mother-in-law now in spirit to help me find the watch. A month later it was found under a bush. It was still working and had survived extreme heat, rain and dirt. I was thrilled. Never give up and look for the magic in any corner you can.
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How is it helpful is it to terrify women that the hospital is out to get them and is brutal out of spite.
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Some women don’t have a choice and must be in the hospital. They are then via social media set up to engage with an “enemy” based on information about hospitals from 20 years ago that aren’t true now.
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Facing an “enemy” is not conducive to an excellent or smooth birth.
Please get your birth education from someone who is active in the birth world and active in the birth room.
My work as a Doula is not to get you a Natural Birth at all costs. My work is a Doula is to prepare you for either terrain with the intent or outcome of emotionally intact parents over a birthing style.
Birth is not friends with fear, must, competition, one way, and overthinking.
Birth is a sacred trance state.
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The solution is to language differently. Educate and language towards the possible and positives one has witnessed wherever your client is birthing.
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We must protect the space.
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Both homebirth and hospital birth are guilty of being imperfect.
There is no perfect Birth.
There is the birth you get.
It is built on years of foundational, psychology, family lineage, culture trauma, gifts, and resilience.
Let’s support our sister, not judge or vilify her for her having a choice, or for her choice of birth room.
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I jumped on into yet another podcast to share about my wild lovely time with birth and all that is magical about our littles. 💖 Thank you Britta Bushnell💖

With my work I hope to be a place where mothers and the “littles” can rest their heads and feel heard.
I love the communication of “the slide show” and being able to confirm the magical intuitive communicative world of babies from pre-conception on.
I do find in trying to explain or share about these deep moments, words fail. The terrain of this work is constantly changing and unusual. I am always growing, learning, and uncovering around the wonder of mothers and family. We are mavericks!
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I am grateful for, and had the best time speaking with for her podcast ! Hers is a rich, wise, and wonderful mind and world.
I was pulling away from speaking about my work on podcasts, but when invited I had to jump in one more time. I love this podcast for its celebration of the journey, and deep dive into what is transformed and changed on the birth trail.
Birth world has changed a lot in the past 25 years I have been witness to it. I’m happy to report for the better in many ways. We still have work to do, but I am proud of my Doula sisters and midwives who have fought heart for your rights across the board.
I hope you enjoy this podcast interview. Please reach out with any questions or comments. Happy Tuesday.💖
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