The Good School

02/24/2024

07/26/2023

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07/15/2023

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Sometimes in our attempts to be positive with our kids (a good thing!), we begin to feel bad about setting limits. Often this is because boundaries can make our kids upset, which is hard for us as parents.

This is your friendly reminder that kids need both warmth and boundaries.

Note: these examples are meant to serve as a guide, not rigid scripts. There are always individual differences and situations that need to be taken into account.

Comment “EMOTIONS” to get our free guide on building emotion regulation through warmth and boundaries.

07/15/2023

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One of the biggest obstacles to stay connected and calm in our parenting is the unresolved hurt we carry with us from childhood. Particularly the stories we haven’t examined and worked through.

Credit:
🎙️Learn more about how to help your child thrive in today’s world; subscribe to THE CHILD PSYCH PODCAST hosted by our co-founders, Tammy Schamuhn & Tania Johnson.

🎙️ This podcast brings you the top parenting & children’s mental health experts in the world. We will educate and inspire you with the most current research & strategies to help foster emotional resiliency & healing in your child or the children you work with.

🎙️Most importantly, we’re here because we need to raise a generation of children who don’t need to recover from their childhoods.

👉LISTEN NOW | LINK IN BIO

07/15/2023

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If we teach our babies how to sleep, it must be because they need to be taught how to sleep.

If we teach our kids how to read, it must be because they need to be taught how to read.

If we teach our children to say please and thank you, it must be because they need to be taught manners.

Only we forget that teaching and learning are two very different things. Just because we teach something doesn’t mean it needed to be taught. And just because we’re teaching doesn’t mean children are learning.

We, adults, take FAR too much credit for the things our children learn. Our society believes, consciously or not, that adults are all-knowing, wise beings whose right and responsibility it is to bestow our knowledge and wisdom onto our children, these helpless blank slates who need us to teach them.

Only, it’s not how learning works. Learning is ignited by our children’s natural curiosity and wonder. Through exploration, taking risks, problem solving, making mistakes, and being willing get it wrong. Our kids are born natural learners. Our choice as parents is whether we fuel or squash their natural love of learning.

Our kids don’t need us to formally teach them to sleep, or use manners or walk or talk. They learn through modeling, and through imitating us.

Learning happens when children are developmentally ready, feel safe and securely attached, and are given the space for curiosity, wonder and awe. Learning, like independence, mustn’t be rushed. It’s a gift that must unfold by itself and we have the responsibility to safeguard that sacred space.

My friend, .vanessalapointe recently shared this quote during a workshop she delivered to Gather members and I just had to share it. How does this land for you? And please tag a friend as we normalize conscious parenting ✨

07/15/2023

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Raise your hand if you don’t want a brilliant child.⁠
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Honestly. Ensuring our child’s good health, happiness, kindness and compassion may well be our highest priorities, but wouldn’t we do all in our power to have the brightest, most talented, top-of-the-class kid? Or, at least, one who doesn’t have to struggle too hard to make the grade?⁠
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And here is where it gets really unfair. If we didn’t have enough issues to puzzle out as new parents with bleary-eyes and sleep-starved brains (like diapering with cloth or disposable, making breast or bottle feeding work, bed sharing or crib sleeping, and interpreting our baby’s cries), we are then presented with a torrent of persuasive, conflicting advice about how to help our babies become the quick thinkers and successful, highly motivated learners we hope they will be. No matter what choices we make, we are bound to have doubts.⁠
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How To Help Your Baby Become A Math Genius (Or Not) is linked to this image in my bio if you'd like to read more.

07/15/2023

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Risk, fear, overcoming, courage, parenting, community, … This is a good one!!!

Enjoy listening to this weekend! Save and share a favorite quote! ⭐️

07/11/2023

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I originally wrote this for the cycle-breaking toddler mama, since that's our focus this month. But really, no matter how old your kids are, if you're breaking harmful cycles and disentangling your parenting practices from how you were parented, here's a prayer for you. You're seen. You're loved. And while it is hard and heavy, God is near, and HIS burden is light.

The Team here at FHAF has a new blog post for the Cycle-Breaking Toddler Moms as well, it is linked in our bio link.

07/08/2023

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My 11yo son is really into Ninja Warrior and is always looking for ways to scale a higher wall and jump over a more daring obstacle. Personally, I am a very risk-adverse, anti-adventure human being 😆 so I have had to work through how not to dump that on to my adrenaline-seeking child. So far, so good (I guess??) :P

Not long ago we had a conversation about how he could improve or excel at a particular obstacle he's had his heart set on conquering and we got to talking about how just doing that obstacle over and over again isn't going to produce growth.

It's the stuff he does away from the obstacle that is going to really count. Like getting the rest he needs. Eating foods that nourish his body. Being mindful of how he speaks to himself. Doing exercises that will strengthen the muscles he needs to conquer the obstacle, etc.

This post is about that.

There are so many things when I became a mom almost 12 years ago that I thought had nothing to do with parenting that turns out...have a A LOT to do with parenting.

I've captured just a handful of these things on the following slides, but would be curious to know what you'd add to this list? Let me know in the comments!

Parenting is hard and overwhelming and messy. And, making this discovery is what inspired me to create the Connected Kid Collection, an empowering bundle of three different parenting products that offer more structure, fun, and ease around talking to your kids about these things in a way that fosters intimacy and connection.

Go to the link in my bio to grab your Connected Kid Collection, or go straight to GetCKC.com to order your set today. :)

07/08/2023

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SAVE THIS! We were fishing yesterday and my daughter ran ahead on a swaying dock 😬. Induce mom panic as I didn't feel like going swimming that day. I yelled "BE CAREFUL" It was like I was talking to a brick wall 🧱🙈

I then yelled after her "watch where you are moving each foot". She slowed down and began being much more mindful of where she was putting her feet 🙌🏼

Morale of the story, saying be careful is something that literally just comes out of our mouths (like it did with me) but it just isn't effective.

Often they will just ignore you (common scenario), become scared, or be confused (be careful of what?) Additionally, it MAY also instill fear and result in kids taking fewer healthy risks and engage in healthy and developmentally appropriate play.

Share this one with others and tag a parent below that would find this helpful 👇🏼

07/08/2023

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Choose calm, my friend. 💛