01/16/2019
This was an eyeopening from Mrs. Mombastic !
"MOTHER:
“My son has been driving me crazy ALL MORNING. Non stop attention seeking. Acting up for no other reason than to get MY ATTENTION.
I had to make breakfast. He kept tugging on the sleeve of my shirt. Asking question after question.
The next thing I know, he runs off, and I hear a ‘crash!’ He’s pulled down a load of stuff off of the shelf. I feel myself starting to lose my cool.... “stop! Just stop now! Go and sit down at the table and I’m bringing your breakfast!” He sheepishly grabs a pencil and paper from the pile of crap that has fallen on the floor from the shelf and runs off to sit down. I can’t even be bothered to get him to bring it back.
I take his breakfast to him at the table and he says to me “look mummy! Look! Look mummy! Look! Look! Look! mummy!??? MUMMY!!!!!!” Pointing to the piece of paper he has drawn on. “Yes dear, that’s nice”, I say. I have so much washing up to do left over from last night and breakfast that I could not concentrate on anything else. Let alone ANOTHER one of his drawings.
Just as I finish the washing up, I hear another ‘crash!’ The bowl with my sons cereal has fallen to the floor. Milk everywhere. “Be careful!” I shout. “Go through to the other room and just keep your hands to yourself!” My son gets down from the table and runs off. Goodness knows what he will get up to next 🙄.
I guess it will just be one of those days.”
CHILD:
“Mummy has been cross this morning. I don’t know why. When we got up she went straight to the kitchen without even talking to me! I kept asking her for my colouring pencils and a piece of paper because I wanted to draw her a picture, but she was too busy to help.
I thought that maybe I could try to get them myself! I’m such a big boy now! So I climbed up to the shelf and reached across but lost my footing and the whole shelf fell down! Mummy was so cross. But it was only an accident. At least I got my paper and pencils all by myself!
I drew a picture of me and her, and tried to show her.... but I think she was still too busy to look. I SO wanted to show her how I wrote my name for the first time without help! Hopefully later.
She brought me my favourite for breakfast! Yum! I ate MOST of it and I knew she would be so proud! I was excited to show her so I climbed down from the table but tripped on the chair leg! The left over milk spilled everywhere. Mummy was so angry.
She asked me to leave her alone for a bit.....”
**********************
Two vastly different perspectives.
It’s very easy to blame a child for attention seeking......
Life is busy, and sometimes taking the time to listen to our children is hard. Inconvenient even.
But it is ever so important.
Because when a child is seemingly attention seeking, they are in fact attachment seeking. Attachment seeking goes beyond babyhood.
It continues on through into childhood.
And it is our job to meet their needs in order to fulfil them.
It’s not possible to acknowledge every single last thing that our children want from us. There simply aren’t enough hours in the day!
But sometimes it helps to at least try and see it from their perspective. Because no matter how it may seem, their main objective is NEVER to inconvenience you.
❤️❤️❤️❤️"
