Diary of an empath

Diary of an empath Just an empath trying to be on a healing journey, but there some very ugly on the inside and sick brained people not consensually in my energy..

and that is why this is a page now.

01/18/2023

Here's an interesting fact from the person "I've never met before" .. from 2 years ago and having someone feel like its ok to fight me in a non loving o reciprocated way, first time ever in my 38 years life that's ever happen, on top of it, he claims me on his taxes, another BRAND NEW BEHAVIOR FOR ME.. fast forward to 2 years later... I meet the one of the same no accountability taking person whose whole existence is a lie.. he's mentioned things I never did as if that's all I'm talking about and couldn't be more wrong, but he chooses to live delusionly and drag me and others into his delusional ideas.. so this "new named liar" is the second person of my 38 years to believe I would tolerate having thier hands on me violently without any fight leading up to their actions, I constantly feel through his behavior I'm having de ja vu.vulnerable.. then asks me if he can claim me on his taxes, I said no.. but am average person saying no wouldn't upset anyone... but someone who recognizes a new boundary of mine, it really upset.. it's eggshell city here and will remain that way, due to if you say anything he doesn't like.. suddenly his vibe changes and he's just not feeling the day anymore... he definitely dishes it and just when I'm gonna dish it back, I do a couple funnies that he has done to me.. he can't take a 1/15th of what he dishes and lives and thrives off of having the upper hand.. abusive and controlling as well as he tries to manipulate, but falls short do did not prey on an innocent soul...
F**k I need a door to open that's not going to involve eggshells. . I've had enough.

01/17/2023

Dear God, please open a door for me that allows me to be myself and flourish and be away from everyone with fake love, hidden intentions and is involved with anything toxic from my past.. this person legit makes going about my day to day in my own mood.. good or not so so so much harder than it already is.. sometimes even impossible..
Not only am I not his type in everyway. The pity that he carries for himself makes me want to do nothing but pray my way away from it... he's so clearly into getting his way when he uses his issues as an excuse. . But this is my one and only life and I refuse to be in a world like this one and not try to leave... I live for myself and I just started to understand what that means... then I get stuck in a situation that's just the devil playing his games again.. also I pray because it has been made clear as day that the day I leave will be a day of abuse and drama.. things I don't do.. enough is enough
And I had enough awhile ago.
God please open a door that I can walk into without anymore strife.. for I have had and am having to much of it. What I'm going through only happens once in a lifetime and I'm done walking on eggshells .. if one can be tough enough to do what was done, then they need to be able to handle what comes with thier actions

12/17/2022

Soooo a friend passes and what should happen happens.. but a parent going and hearing from the circus itself telling me I have to go through it alone.. s**ts wack as f**k.. where I stay is not the best place to cope in a healthy way.. mostly cuz my truth gets ignored and it’s all about something else.. Sh*ts weird, imma need reality FULLY.. this half ass bu****it is not and never has been for me..

12/17/2022

Someone who isn’t socially experienced in SO MANY WAYS and IT SHOWS… acts like a HELPLESS FEMALE CONSTANTLY, and acts like one as well.. is something I don’t wanna be around anymore.. I believed I signed up for MEN! Not two BETA AS FUUUUCK, people whose gender is EXTREMELY questionable and treats me like a it’s a lil cry baby bitch who wants to fight CONSTANTLY.. I signed up to be around 2 GUYS.. and out of ALL THE GUYS IVE BEEN AROUND.. I gotta say, the chick Michele I kicked it around in 2106 was BY FAR more manly personality wise, than these 2 f**k offs BY FAR.. just over the blah blah blah.. I talk ALOT, but it’s genuine not just noise, and I’m BORED OF TALKING.. because I just don’t say words that are empty and meaningless… unlike these 2.. geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez.. disrespectful and delusional is what I’m dealing with.. it’s getting old and I want all dumb f**ks like and alike and go ahead and throw in the PATTONS out of my life FOR GOOD AND EVER… this s**t SUUUUCKS.. it’s getting to the point I rather be IN THE MF SHELTER AND ON MY OWN.. than watch these so called “guys” BE WOMAN ANOTHER DAY.. and of course the one that’s so high and mighty is acting up cuz he or she thinks I won’t bounce…
BET BRO.. keep up the bitch ass attitude EVERYDAY ALL DAY.. and YOUR PART IN MY WORLD BEFORE YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND WHATS GOING ON.. and to add to the abuse, TELLING ME TO FIND MY OWN WAY IS ABUSE..

12/15/2022

It just mocked gunner… and then they joke about what my soul FEELS here.. just DOESNT CARE.. tough stuff. I can hear them trying to talk with or at me and I’m like I am not involved IN YOUR PATHOLOGICAL BEHAVIOR.. god help me.. I’m so sick of this phone, of Facebook, but WHEN THIS IS ALL THERE IS, OF COURSE IM GOING TO BE ON HERE.. rather not.

12/15/2022

All his noises are invalid.. don’t u DARE speak that way to me intentionally AND YOU DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT ZOMBIES IS OR PLAY THEM?? FAKE.. someone’s trying to fake being JOE FURR to me.. and it doesn’t even MATTER.. that person and me have been NOTHING.. but a fraud/fan doesn’t know up from down when it comes to my life and has been trying to do dumb s**t to my mind using joes voice.. and referring to what joe last said to me.. I AM CONFIDENT THAT THIS BEHAVIOR AND MY REACTION TO THIS KIND OF S**T IS WHAT WOULD CAUSE AN ADVERSE REACTION.. this sounds like a frauds trying to groundhog YEAR me.. like it’s A DAY U fraudulent freaks.. also whose going to tell it that it can say everything I say.. but it’s actions already got it Renee’s part.. and as the one who lived it, that’s what it is.. period.. point.. blank.. period… why am I around haters, when I just wanna be around friends?? F**k ..

12/15/2022

Well.. IF nothing weird was going on, what the plan just was but my awareness (and this) spoiled it.. one texts the other.. come upstairs, cuz I just said something about the OBVIOUS behavior.. no detective needed, they just that obvious.. then I move and just like that.. everything has stopped in the middle.. when I don’t care about what they are hiding nearly as much as they care about hiding it.. it’s stupid and pathological bu****it.. serious issues and I’m here just able to report the news in my world.. it’s truly insane and not my kind either.. clearly. My kind of insane wouldn’t have me posting DUMB S**T here on Facebook.. wish someone else could see and hear this.. it’s nutty and unnecessary

12/15/2022

So update: a random number texts him and says some dirty things ect.. he responds in a normal way and what was said to him wasn’t even normal.. it sounded made up .. because it was.. idk if it’s ignorance or ego?? Either way DANG

12/15/2022

Note to self: Don’t bring up ANYTHING with a NARCISSIST! Cuz a snowball of projection is coming your way (my way) afterwards.. **k I NEED SAVED from a NARCISSIST what seems like AGAIN!! HHhhhhhheeeeellllllppppppp!!! ASAP!

12/15/2022

Well well well.. impostor syndrome showed itself.. they use the voice hoping I’m into that, when I’m not.. but then it was all just BAMBOOZLED when they don’t even know WTF is going on.. LLOL.. dummies

12/15/2022

Disguised ones be the MOST MISERABLE.. like answer me this.. WHY DID YOU NOT ONLY MAKE A CONSCIOUS EFFORT TO BE IN MY WORLD… AND to top it off, you GAVE UP SOMETHING (wether it’s drugs, money or whatever) YOU still chose to exchange your “goods” to be in my world.. and you come and make yourself MISERABLE??? Damn frauds you need some serious life guidance… just trying to create nonsense all because someone’s subliminal fit didn’t get them the feeling they need.. but it did get one to make the effort to getting what will stop a childish behavior, but it wasn’t good enough for the one who throws a subliminal fit.. EVER-SINGLE-TIME.. since it didn’t deliver the feeling the one expected… it decided to run the washer for HOURS, play with the wifi, f**k with another’s system cuz it’s like a mad lol toddler (I can’t even say child, cuz that’s pretty offensive to children and my child has never acted the way some adults do) played with the coffee maker so the coffee sucks.. literally went WAY out of its way to ENSURE everyone (even the one who caters to them in every way) doesn’t have a good day… all because the DRUGS weren’t what they wanted.. damn.
If the sell out even had a CLUE to how much they could of gained if they would step into and acknowledge reality.. more than some dope that works, cuz the buyer new the stuff the other one went sooo far out of thier way to get them was bad.. they needed a reason to get in CHEAP.. when the non female acting one could of gotten SO SO SO SO MUCH MORE! And that’s just some unpopular truths.
(Worst part is, it’s only truly effecting the one that cares for it all the time) now that’s a s**tty person.. and until the other sees it for themselves, it’s going to keep going on.. selfish people are the worst. damn near seems ALOT LIKE the time I was 18 and watched a MOOCH mooch everything and anything off of someone who at that time was my actual friend… it was hard to watch.. and even here is getting hard to watch.. apparently once a MOOCHING LEECHING ASS.. always a mooching leeching ass.. I would like to request a different time and dimension.. cuz during this time I had my person to vent to about the bu****it.. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again.. IF YOUR WACK, CHEAP, out of the LOOP, DUMB ASS CANT BRING BACK THE WHOLE TIME YOUR DESPERATELY TRYING TO COPY.. then your a mf fraud and YOU know it.. It’s sad to watch someone with good intentions just get used for more, more, more and then some more.. while the one taking does NOTHING to help the one giving and this last go around just proved that no matter one’s efforts, if it doesn’t get what it wants, well sucks for the one who pays for everything.. up the water bill, drink or eat EVERYTHING that anyone likes, ruin the coffee until whatever was put in their washes through.. Create conflict and misery between the giver and the 3rd person who isn’t here to drain anyone or take anything.. one that actually cares about the human race.. This is divide and conquer at work.. also crazy brain.. cuz here I am rumbling on about nothing.. got damn this is the BIGGEST adult BABY I’ve ever encountered.. ZERO regard for the one who has ruined his connection to the genuine one for the connection of someone who will never get enough from the giver…
It’s all around disrespectful as f**k!! Since you do change this is MY WORLD and NO ONE INVITED DUMMYS WHO ONLY ACT DUMB AS F**K WHEN THEY DELUSIONALLY BELIEVE NO ACCOUNTABILITY WILL HAVE TO BE TAKEN.. that’s when thier TRUE TRUE COLORS COME OUT.. and they are never GREEN FLAGS.. nope everytime it takes advantage of the disguise… unaware that what they believe ISNT TRUE.. and if you chose to be in this world of mine.. best believe SOMEONE IS OUT THERE WHO WILL HOLD YOU ACCOUNTABLE… it’s crazy to me that the thought of that is unimaginable to the same ones who are hiding behind a face and persona that ISNT THIERS.. thier mind should be open to all of it.. not what just suits them.. some STILL haven’t learned anything… dang.. double dang.. half ass wanna be time teleporters… the one getting everything taken care of while they just create passive subliminal tension, probably told the other one that there was a time I did that for anyone.. and I hate to say it.. BUT THE PEOPLE I CHOSE TO KEEP COMPANY WITH HAVE TO BE ON MY LEVEL SOME WHAT! Cuz money is too hard to make and I don’t earn money for s**ts and giggles.. i have ambitions.. and blowing it on someone who just choses laziness and moochiness.. and will leave as soon as a better suited situation for them arises.. it’s a lesson the giver is going to learn in a very hard way.. I’m getting pushed out of the dynamic slowly for someone whose going to bounce the MOMENT they can.. especially after this last ball… they leave people in such s**tty situations and ALONE, cuz while mooching they will make the giver believe that they need NO ONE, but the one whose doing absolutely nothing for them but draining their life force in EVERY WAY! It all adds up to when I was 18.. the one is DIRTY, but can’t be the dirty they were then, cuz the giver wouldn’t allow that.. so instead it RARELY SHOWERS and STINKS UP ALL the givers furniture… knowing it’s just WAITING for someone in another state to let them go there.. probably had to come here, cuz it’s this way everywhere it goes that no one wanted the misery and negativity as well as laziness and expecting way more than it gives.. so it came here to take advantage of a lonely man whose mentally ill… cuz he’s the one left that hasn’t experienced WHY it has NO ONE out of all the people it knows, not ONE of them will let him do this to them… but the lonely unsuspecting LAST RESORT (their words) he’s taking full advantage of his giving nature and oblivious to what’s really going on… sad honestly… it takes awhile to recover from one of these… (that’s if u do) the pair I knew when I was 18.. the giver NEVER RECOVERED FROM THE TAKER.. too this day.. SADFACTS

12/14/2022

The inconsistency is INSANE! I have yet to have a GENUINE relationship that I apply life lessons and learn and love and LIVE happily.. WHY would I settle for the inconsistency of who I’m unsure if they are lying or not.. the last ship I had.. there was more good times than bad times.. They didn’t treat me like I was a god damn person with NO BRAIN! This one does all the time.. it’s frustrating, annoying, ugly, ect, ect.. I’m too young to be living this way.. I DONT want to live this way.. I haven’t LIVED YET!!

Address

Pipestone, MN

Website

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when Diary of an empath posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Shortcuts

Share

Category