Refs Need Love Too

Refs Need Love Too To provide the tools and resources needed to mentor, inspire and develop the next generation of refs.

08/31/2026

You can’t control everything that happens in a soccer match, but you can definitely control how you show up.

People will judge you in less than a second based on how you look. If you show up looking like a professional, players, coaches and spectators are more likely to treat you like a professional. This is true both on and off the pitch.

if you want the best referee socks money can buy, with the compression and grip you need to perform, definitely check out the socks on my shop. They are absolutely amazing! Compression exactly where you want it and the grip you need to perform at your best!

08/31/2026

Is it a red card for a denial of obvious goalscoring opportunity or a yellow card for stopping promising attack? Let me know your thoughts and reasoning in the comments.

This is a tough one. I’m gonna let this video sit for about 48 hours before I give my thoughts. I’m completely open to the possibility that I am wrong.

08/28/2026

Come cheer on our men’s and women’s CP national teams this October at our national training center! Better yet, come volunteer to help facilitate it. I’ll put the link to volunteer in my bio.

It’s actually a lot of fun to watch! The athletes have a range of abilities and backgrounds. CP stands for cerebral palsy, but it also includes athletes who have suffered brain injuries.

I believe our US men’s captain is a former Army Ranger who was injured attempting to save some of his fellow soldiers in combat. He loves to play the game and represent his country.

Definitely check out my podcast this week with Skye Arthur-Banning to learn more about the CP World Cup and blind soccer, which will be featured at the Paralympics in Los Angeles in 2028.

Let me know if you have any questions.

U.S. Soccer Extended NTs U.S. Soccer Chileshe Chitulangoma

08/28/2026

A post match survey isn’t perfect, but it’s a step in the right direction. With over 4000 matches happening on over 1200 fields in one single weekend it’s impossible for us to be everywhere and to see everything.

We know that losing coaches tend to rate referees worse than winning coaches. One rating doesn’t matter anyway. If we see someone who’s consistently scoring 4 or above after 10 matches from 20 different coaches, then we know we have a top performer. The inverse is also true. we want to be able to celebrate those who deserve it and get the appropriate feedback in training to those who need it.

We also need to know about coaches and spectators who are not creating the types of positive and supportive environment. We expect at SOCAL Soccer league.

What do you think?

SOCAL Soccer League SOCAL Referees

Workin on the pitch! It is always such an amazing treat to receive images of our work as a referee. No one ever comes to...
08/26/2026

Workin on the pitch! It is always such an amazing treat to receive images of our work as a referee. No one ever comes to watch us, but it’s so cool to see images like this. It’s something I sincerely appreciate and cherish when it happens. I know other refs love it too!!!!

Big thank you and photo credits to Dylan Lopez ❤️❤️❤️

08/26/2026

Finding joy as a referee isn’t hard for me. I find it when I see kids discover soccer for the first time, when I hear a kid pick up and encourage a teammate, when I see outrageous footballing skill on display. All of it brings me joy and happiness.

Most of all, I love getting to connect with other human beings around a common love of the beautiful game. Whether it’s the players, coaches or my fellow referees. There’s an instant bond. In a world where so many people feel isolated and alone, the soccer pitch is the ultimate connector.

What’s your favorite thing about being a referee?

08/26/2026

A good Referee Flip Coin is a wonderful thing. Not only are they functional (easy to determine heads or tails), but they may even be a conversation piece or something fun to share with the captains at the coin toss. 

I help design and manufacturer Referee coins for associations and tournaments. Send me an email at [email protected] if you want to create something. Minimum quantityis 100 coins.

Do you have a favorite Referee flip coin? Share a picture in the comments. 

08/24/2026

Anything can happen even when you least expect it! I’ve personally never had this happen during one of my matches, but now I know what to do if it does. Has this ever happened in one of your matches?

For clarity, a player on the defending team was off the pitch receiving treatment. They were granted permission to leave the field, but they needed permission to re-enter the field from the Referee. They did not receive permission and then became actively involved with play. The punishment is a caution 🟨 and a direct free kick from the spot of the interference. Since they were in their own penalty area, the result is a penalty kick.

Let me know if you have any questions

08/24/2026

This is quite a precedent to set! Will it only be done for ghost scoring situations? Will this be for other types of fouls or offenses? What do you think about this? Good idea or has the league gone too far? Let me know in the comments.

08/23/2026

“I’m going to call ICE on you!” is a straight sendoff for Abusive Language in my book. There is so much ignorance and hate wrapped up in that statement.  Ufortunately I didn’t hear it.

I had been managing this match pretty well up until this point. Two yellow cards for reckless challenges, and a few kids getting frustrated that they were getting beat. I made sure to remind the kids to stay focused on playing soccer and don’t engage in any trash talking.

I hadn’t had any issues with this kid previously in the match. Nothing at all to be concerned about and then this happened. So upsetting.

Here’s what I did. I handled it exactly like I would for MLS Next:
- stop the match and investigate. Try and make sure you have a clear picture of what is alleged.

- inform the coaches of both teams what was alleged and why that is completely unacceptable.

- gather the relevant information to include in a supplemental report

- bring the players together and inform them what was supposedly said and why that is completely unacceptable on this pitch.

- hopefully, get everyone back, focused on playing soccer and try and complete a safe match.

Would you have done anything different?

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