05/13/2024
It is undeniable that humanity is always going through something, either collectively at times, or on an individual level. Usually I feel like it’s a combo of both.
These days, I am in a phase of acceptance. I’m owning my new title of Mentally Messy Book Coach.
For most of my life, I’ve been trying to shame myself into being better. Working harder. Achieving more. Being a better mother, editor, friend, partner, business owner, etc.
Spoiler alert: shame is not a motivator (for me).
As I’ve spent the last year+ slowly relearning how to show up in the world, slowly beginning to accept myself with all my flaws and all my messy and actually celebrate it (I might forget to answer that email for a couple weeks, but get on a zoom call with me and you will NOT be struggling with your story a moment more).
I see where my empathy and high emotions are a beautiful thing, not something to shut off.
I see where the urge to pull my hair (trichotillomnia) or bite my nails is actually telling me that something is off in my body right now. What do I need to pay attention to? Or do I need to just go take a walk and release some energy?
I’ve allowed my creative brain to jump every which direction and follow it with curiosity instead of judgement for being like a pin ball machine.
And I’m on a path to choose happiness and joy, even when that means choosing to lean into fear instead of shying away and staying where it’s comfortable. The comfort hurts. Because that’s also where the pain lives: The clinical depression. The generalized anxiety. The dissociating. The self-doubt.
As I’ve been growing and changing over the the past year (I say past year because that’s when I decided to put a major focus on my mental well-being, but it’s been a lifetime of ups and downs as I work on myself), I have seen what the long term work looks like. The slow work of actively choosing to love yourself unconditionally.
If there is anything I could want for another human, for every human, it is to love yourself unconditionally. Life is going to be hard no matter what. Loving yourself is the one thing we can fully control.
Come celebrate your beautiful mental messiness with me.
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