Becoming Real, LLC

🌸 The Kinder Truth 🌸

Sometimes, the things we say to ourselves are technically true—maybe we made a mistake, missed a goal, or didn’t show up as our best self. But truth without kindness isn’t growth—it’s self-punishment.

The kinder truth is this: You can acknowledge what’s real without tearing yourself down. You can hold yourself accountable and still love who you are. You can change the way you speak to yourself—not because you’re lying, but because you deserve compassion on the journey.

💬 Instead of “I always mess things up,” try: “I didn’t get it right this time, but I’m learning.”

💬 Instead of “I’ll never be enough,” try: “I’m growing, and that’s more than enough today.”

Loving yourself and building self-esteem begins with changing that inner voice. Not to avoid the truth, but to tell it in a way that heals.

It was 7 years ago tonight that 49 souls danced for the last time. Our community in Orlando and across the world has mourned ever since. Not much has changed in Florida to stop gun violence or homophobia since that terrible day.
There is an assault on trans people's rights all across our country, and we cannot stand by and let this happen, particularly for trans youth. Stand up in their memory. LGBTQ rights are human rights.

Hope & Possibility in 2024. Here is our latest blog article by Angel Prather our amazing Masters Level Intern: https://www.totalhealthguidance.com/hope-possibility/

Enjoy!

Looking through my memories today, I stumbled upon the 2014 entry that marked the beginning of my journey to living my life as my authentic self. The first year, I decided to choose a word for the year instead of making a resolution. This journey has been an incredible experience, filled with ups and downs, tears and laughter, but throughout it all, I've remained true to myself. I've learned to say no without feeling guilty and to never compromise my true self to make others happy. I'm grateful to my wonderful friends who have embraced the authentic me, even though I know I can be a bit much at times. For ten years, I've chosen a word for the year and strived to live up to it or make the necessary changes to incorporate it into my life. 2023 Word of the Year is Journey.

This is my post from 2014:
My goal for this year is to always be authentic. A passage from The Velveteen Rabbit comes to mind: "When you are Real, you don't mind being hurt." This rings true for me. I know who I am, and "when you're real, you can't be ugly except to those who don't understand."
Becoming vulnerable and opening yourself up to being hurt is a scary experience. The mere thought of rejection can cause anxiety and fear in most people. This fear can be so strong that it prevents us from experiencing a close relationship filled with unconditional love. When love is given unconditionally and received openly, the love in the relationship is real.
Real love is selfless, kind, thoughtful, responsible, respectful, steadfast, and long-lasting. Having real love doesn't mean that life is always easy. Real love in real life makes it easier to endure hardships and trials. A real life not only has a deeper meaning, but it also has direction and purpose. You cannot have a real life or love until you first become real. Being real isn't about external beauty. The only way to become real is by working on your inner self.
Changing from within is a painful journey. It involves improving your character, smoothing out rough edges, and getting rid of sharp edges, which requires effort and a willingness to experience pain. Changing to become real is challenging and painful, but it's worth it to be fully accepted and loved unconditionally for our authentic, often imperfect selves.

Forgiveness is not the same as condoning the actions of others. It's about freeing yourself from resentment and anger, which can hurt you more than the person you're forgiving. You don't have to forget the pain to forgive, as acknowledging and processing the pain is crucial to the healing process. Forgiveness is a journey, not a destination. Letting go of the past and moving forward takes time and effort.

It's possible to forgive someone without reconciling with them. Sometimes, it's not safe or healthy to have a relationship with someone who has hurt you. Forgiveness is possible for even the most difficult offenses, and no matter how deeply you've been hurt, there is hope for healing and freedom.

Remember, forgiving is a gift you give to yourself, not to the other person. Forgiving doesn't mean forgetting or denying the truth. Holding onto anger and resentment only hurts you. You can't control what other people do, but you can control how you respond to them.

Why do we feel the need to make promises to improve as we start a new year? Who started this tradition of placing never-ending pressure on ourselves? Instead of feeling the need to improve, we should congratulate ourselves for making it through another year. As we enter a new year, let's make promises to be kinder to ourselves and to acknowledge the weight we bear as humans. If we are to make promises, let's pledge to rest before our bodies force us to. We should pause and appreciate life as it happens and reveal our true, flawed, and wondrous humanity. Why should we begin another year with demands on our already overstrained humanity when we could learn to accept ourselves as imperfect? Imperfection is where the beauty of life lies, and if we can find that beauty, we will find peace. I wish you peace in 2023, and everything else will fall into place. Let it be so.

Life is not always a bowl of cherries, but Life Coaching works in a way that nothing else can - to help you move your life into a vastly happier, more fulfilled place.
So. When's a good time to start? That would be now!
Let's get you started on your road to a wonderfully better life.
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1. The first and most important person you must believe in is yourself.

2. I do not fix problems. I fix my thinking. Then problems fix themselves.

3. It’s not about being the best. It’s about being better than you were yesterday.

4. If the plan doesn’t work change the plan, not the goal.

5. A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.