The Organic Beet - TESC

In honor of 2018's Graduating Class, we salute you.

We Asked the Graduating Class of 2015 What They'll be Doing After They Leave Evergreen…
"Stop planes from getting lost into the ocean" - Terry Carrel, Liberal Arts student
"Eat less kale." - Sharon Styles, Physics major
"Figure out what programs I signed up for!" - Ashley Wetens, Theoretical Geography major
"Change my gender for tax purposes" -Amandar Qual, Major: Oppression
"Ask for forgiveness for going to Evergreen"- Ivan Burton, Russian exchange student, and ‘Merica History Major
"Get a high paying local organic farmer position to help pay for my loans" -Tom Petty, Biomedical engineering major
"Change my name" –Kissofahumingbird Johnson Major: it doesn't really matter
"Write my last issue of the organic beet" -Pranav Hippargi
"I don't actually go to school here, I just got an invite in the mail saying I graduated" -Confused Guy, Liberal Arts major
"Find my fu***ng shoe" -Shoe Guy, Archaeology major
"Get the taste of Palestinian blood out of my mouth" -Einstein Bagels major
“Stop spending so much goddamned time writing satirical newspapers.”-Dakota Dominguez
"Find a school where everyone won't get on your case for buying a particle accelerator" -Les Purce, Interdimensional Cosmic Being
"I don't know I haven't asked my parents yet" -Bradley Margarine, Art Therapy major.- Patrick Bateman

I feel like if civil rights leaders weren't getting assassinated all the time and they were alive now neolibralism is so strong it would have even overtaken there morals. I can't help but imagine Dr. Rev MLK Jr as a mattress salesman. "I had a dream, and you can too on our new temperpidic mattress sale."

So just like a heads up to everyone like Capital Lake Fair is happening downtown right now and it turns out that we actually can't enjoy it because it's actually pretty problematic. Yeah. I shouldn't have to be the one to remind you that TRUMP and also that OPPRESSION and also REPUBLICANS and COPS. So yeah. I'm sure you are beginning to see how devastatingly problematic Lake Fair is. I was down there last night just to be disgusted and I saw three little kids squeal with joy when their grandpas won them big pink stuffed animals, I'm sure you can see how problematic that is because that's pretty problematic. First of all HETERONORMATIVE GENDER STEREOTYPES. And also CHINA. And A LACK OF MULTICULTURAL SPACES. I should not have to be the one to tell you about PRIVILEGE. How about we give kids copies of The New Jim Crow as a prize, did anyone even suggest that? I DIDN'T THINK SO. I got myself a corn dog just so I could compost it and the person at the food cart didn't even go out of their way to tell me IF there were any gluten free options, they didn't ask me my gender pronoun, NOR did they open our transaction with a solemn recognition that this conversation between two oppressors was about to take place upon stolen Native American land. I don't know this for sure but I'm pretty sure that those uniforms the festival staff are wearing include some PETROLEUM PRODUCTS. I mean what the actual f**k Olympia? We're supporting the oil and gas industry now? That's so problematic. Have we forgotten about CLIMATE CHANGE? SEA LEVEL RISE? 😭
I just want everyone to know, that yes I went to Lake Fair last night, but no way I enjoyed it. It was all a social experiment for me, it was like watching a train wreck and I couldn't look away. Yes, I got an elephant ear with extra sugar and ate it, but I condemned it vocally and talked about the plight of the POC farmers that likely grew the wheat the entire time I ate it. Yes I played the carnival games and won prizes, but I told everyone around me how problematic competition is the entire time. Yes I rode the rides and made sounds as if I were having fun but NEWS FLASH I WAS DEFINITELY BEING IRONIC. Just in case anyone was wondering, I definitely didn't have any fun, and neither should you. Fun, when you actually stop and think about it, is pretty problematic.

Obligatory "I don't celebrate 4th of July because the US is s**t and also something about colonialism and something about topical political issues" post.

THIS IS WHAT OPPRESSION LOOKS LIKE

"You mean I'll put down my sword and you'll put down your rock and we'll try and kill each other like civilized people?"

Princess Bride Dream Of Large Women

When two parties looking for a fight show up for a fight there tends to be a fight. Fighting is stupid.

ANCHORMAN COMPLETE FIGHT SCENE Complete fighting scene from the movie Anchorman Cena completa de luta do filme O Ancora

PLEASE copy & paste this post and share this info with everyone you know in Olympia: Juicy McOso the Flying Race Relations Mediation Grizzly Bear is targeting Olympia as his next stop on his tour of interplanetary exploration and race relations mediation. Juicy McOso the Flying Race Relations Mediation Grizzly Bear will be armed with glitter and sprinkles and will be coming to ask YOU and YOUR FRIENDS serious and thought provoking questions about race relations on campus. Juicy McOso the Flying Race Relations Mediation Grizzly Bear can be INTIMIDATING for many persons. Use your COMMON SENSE when deciding whether or not to engage with him in intellectually stimulating conversation, it might challenge your point of view or ENCOURAGE you to see things from someone else’s point of view. Be advised, Juicy McOso the Flying Race Relations Mediation Grizzly Bear is not one of Our Lord’s angels. Nor is Juicy McOso the Flying Race Relations Mediation Grizzly Bear a winged agent of the one who calls himself Satan. Juicy McOso the Flying Race Relations Mediation Grizzly Bear will STUDY UP on YOU and YOURFRIENDS on social media before interacting with you and he thinks photos of people using SnapChat filters are HIGHLY OFFENSIVE to his people. We recommend deleting 100% of your SnapChat pictures with silly things in them 100% immediately. If you want to gain his favor so that he might decide to smite your intellectual enemies be advised to have OTTER POPS on hand in MUCHOS COLORES porque él ama popsicles de la nutria. Jugoso McBear el Eelaciones De La Raza Grizzly Oso no tiene miedo de los conservadores y por lo que definitivamente va a venir a Olympia sin dudarlo y muy rápido. Asegúrese de decirle a su robot amigos porque no le gustan los robots o gatos, no mucho.