Unattached Athlete

05/04/2025

Just another , from a certain point of view.

05/25/2023

Orange you glad I didn’t say, “banana”?

11/14/2022

09/07/2022

Unlike actual ninjas, Ninja Warrior competitors rarely have any martial arts training.

Either add hand-to-hand combat to the obstacle courses or just call it what it really is: Competitive Jungle Gyming.

07/20/2022

Threw some BP in the batting cage/bullpen yesterday and discovered that an Eastern Cicada Killer has taken up residence under the cage’s flooring near the ball funnel.

After a quick Googlin’ between hitters, I learned that these scary-lookin’ fellas are the gentle giants of the wasp world.

They live rather solitary lives usually only 2-4 weeks in duration.

They rarely sting humans, but when they do, they only register a 0.5 on the 4-point Schmidt Sting Pain Index, which is significantly weaker and less painful than a common Honey Bee’s average sting of 2.0.

Additionally, Sweat Bees register a 1.0 and Fire Ants a 1.2.

These benign wasps boast three broken yellow bands across their black abdomens, unlike more dangerous Murder Hornets whose abdominal bands alternate in multiple unbroken brown and orange stripes.

This strange new visitor can stay as long as she wants, enjoying free baseball for the remainder of her days.

07/18/2022

I'd venture to guess that 90% of all dietary supplements don't deliver on their claims, and many of 'em can actually cause unwanted side effects.

5% deliver on their vague claims, but only temporarily and only via some permutation of the placebo effect.

The remaining 5% contain an active ingredient that actually does what it says it does, but half of those are cut with useless fillers or packed with superfluous bells and whistles just to manipulate the pricing.

That being said, I'm not here just to crap on the supplement industry; I'm also here to crap on fitness influencers.

A large percentage of fitness influencers endorse supplement companies just to get free or discounted supplements.

That's kinda like a musician who endorses a music store just to get paid in air guitars.

07/10/2022

Next time you watch sports, especially male sports, I want you to look for all the "male supplement" ads/commercials that air during the broadcast.

The typical script will play out like this:

*Roll footage of out-of-shape dadbods sweating through their frumpy polo shirts and ill-fitting pants on a golf course, or struggling with minimal weights on a useless weight machine in the gym. Notice the drowned-out colors caused by strategic camera filters. Also notice the slowed-down speed of the footage...and tons of male grimacing.*

Narrator chimes in. "By age-X, the average male loses his ability to generate hormone-Y by Z%."

*Splash before-and-after photos of a former pro athlete or a men's physique model.*

"Paid endorser's testimonial, yada yada yada."

*Roll clips of very athletic men playing pickup basketball, lifting
heavier weights, and actually running with smiles on their spray-tanned faces. Notice the vivid colors and sped-up footage.*

"Try our pills, risk-free for one month, to enhance your natural production of hormone-Y. Reclaim your youth!"

*Camera cuts to a beautiful actress portraying the paid male endorser's blushing wife.*

"She'll love it too!"

*Elbow nudge, wink-wink, .*
..and scene!

There's so much sleaze to these ads like these and to the supplement industry in general.

Sure, they played all the common marketing cards: The camera tricks. The manipulated before-and-after photos. The pro athletes and figure models who probably don't even use said product. And even the not-so-subtle endorsement of shady sexual side effects to persuade dudes to make an impulse buy with their...precious downstairs organ.

Perhaps the most devious portion of the script is what ISN'T said.

Yeah, the stats about average males losing their ability to produce testosterone and human growth hormone at certain ages are probably valid.

The most underhanded ploy here is that the script leads the viewer to believe that the decline in male hormone levels is inevitable and automatic and that we are hapless victims of aging.

Notice how the script said, "the average male"?

What do we know about "the average male"?

He consumes more calories than he needs.

He consumes more alcohol than he should.

He doesn't exercise regularly, and when he does, he rarely lifts weights with any intent.

Marketing teams fail to mention that, whenever the average male is inconsistent with any of these health markers, the average male's hormonal profile adapts itself--or more accurately, it dumbs itself down--to match their lifestyle.

Lifting weights 3-5 times per week will naturally increase your testosterone and growth hormone levels, and even more so than any pill or powder can ever hope to. Plus, if you know how to manipulate your set, rep, and rest schemes properly, you can even choose which hormone you want to prioritize.

But that kind of info doesn't sell pills.

Well, maybe to average people, it does?

The sales script with the complete truth might look like this:

"By age-X, the ACTIVE male sees no loss in his ability to generate hormone-Y. By age-X-plus-ten, there is minimal loss. By age-40 and beyond, their hormonal profiles resemble those of average men half their age."

The takeaway message from all this is that you don't even have to destroy yourself in the gym. Just show up 3-5 days a week for the long haul, challenge yourself, ditch the snake oils, alcohol, and excess calories, and instead drink regularly from the closest thing we'll probably ever get to The Fountain of Youth: strength training!