Enneagram Motions of the Soul: Clare and Scott Loughrige

09/03/2026

Maybe love is still there, waiting beneath the full life.
Waiting to be remembered.
Waiting to be tended.
Waiting for the two of you to look up and find each other again.

There is a quiet ache in carrying life together and still missing each other.

You can pass each other in the kitchen.
Coordinate the schedule.
Answer the messages.
Show up for the children.
Serve the church.
Care for the people who need you.

And still miss each other.

Not because love is gone.

Because attention has been pulled in every direction except toward the relationship itself.

Tenderness rarely disappears all at once.

Sometimes it gets covered over by good things.

Responsibilities.
Service.
Fatigue.
Plans.
Needs.
The next thing waiting to be done.

Grace makes room to notice.

Not with shame.
With compassion.

Maybe love is still there, waiting beneath the full life.

Waiting to be remembered.
Waiting to be tended.
Waiting for the two of you to look up and find each other again.

09/03/2026

This is such an important question to be asking of our marriage relationship. Are you functioning or flourishing?

A relationship can be functioning and still not be flourishing.

The bills are paid.
The calendar is managed.
The responsibilities are handled.
The kids are cared for.
The work gets done.
Life keeps moving.

And that matters. Carrying a life together is no small thing.

But flourishing asks a different question:

Are we still connected inside the life we are managing?

Is tenderness being nourished?
Are we still curious about one another?
Is there room for delight?
For honesty?
For repair?
For rest?
For return?

Functioning keeps the life moving.
Flourishing keeps love alive within it.

Overflow for Couples is an invitation to notice where you are functioning, where you are flourishing, and where love might be asking for a little more room again.

Return to the well within.
Tend the love between.

08/12/2026

Love needs a way back. 🤍

We are still learning the sacred practice of return — and we’re looking forward to sharing more of this at Overflow for Couples.

Not every rupture is loud.

Sometimes rupture is a sharp word.
Sometimes it is a misunderstanding.
Sometimes it is disappointment, defensiveness, or anger.

And sometimes, rupture is the silence that follows.

The conversation stops.
The tenderness retreats.
The repair gets delayed.
The distance grows.

Silence can be holy.
Silence can be wise.
Silence can give us room to breathe and listen.

But untended silence can also become a place where hurt hardens.

Repair is not pretending nothing happened.

Repair is the practice of returning with enough honesty to tell the truth and enough tenderness to stay connected while telling it.

Some people rush repair because conflict feels unsafe.
Some avoid repair because honesty feels too risky.
Some want to move on before the hurt has been named.

But love needs a way back.

Overflow for Couples invites couples to notice what happens after rupture — and begin practicing the kind of repair that makes return feel safer, steadier, and more full of grace.

08/07/2026

Today I’m leading a 60-minute session for Enneagram Collaborative Global, exploring the Enneagram as more than a personality typing system—as a pathway toward spiritual awareness, healing, and transformation.

There’s an old warning about those who seek power by riding on the back of a tiger—only to eventually be swallowed by it.

I wonder if our personalities can work the same way.
Each Enneagram type carries a genuine gift. But what happens when, out of fear or self-protection, we overplay the gift? Strength becomes control. Discernment becomes rigidity. Love becomes the need to be needed. Vigilance becomes suspicion. Peace becomes self-forgetting.

The strategy that once helped us navigate life can begin to consume our freedom.

Together we’ll explore a Harmony, Trinitarian, trauma-informed approach to the Enneagram, listening through Head, Heart, and Body and asking:
What if the deeper question isn’t simply, “What’s my type?” but “What is my soul seeking beneath my personality strategy?”

Come explore what happens when we stop asking our personality to
save us—and begin listening for the deeper invitation of the soul. 🌿

If you're a helping professional, I'd love for you to join me on Zoom this Friday from 12:00–1:00 PM ET for an engaging conversation:

The Enneagram and the Spiritual Journey: Beyond Personality—What's Your Soul Seeking?

We'll explore how the Enneagram beyond personality typing as a pathway for deeper spiritual awareness, healing, and transformation.

This is also a great opportunity to connect with other coaches, therapists, spiritual directors, pastors, and helping professionals who are passionate about accompanying others on their journey.

Non-members are welcome for just $7.

Learn more ⬇️

08/06/2026

Every relationship has an inner world that deserves to be tended with care.

We are looking forward to creating space for couples to slow down, notice what is shaping their relationship, and rediscover the sacred gift of the love they share—a special invitation has gone out for October. Let this be a good moment to pause and consider the garden you're cultivating together.

Every relationship has a shared inner world.

The private jokes.
The tender conversations.
The wounds still healing.
The prayers no one else hears.
The dreams still becoming clear.
The places where trust is still learning to grow.

In spiritual language, we might call this an enclosed garden.

Not a place of secrecy.
A place of sacred protection.

An enclosed garden is the space in a relationship where love is tended without being performed.

It helps couples ask:

• What belongs between us?
• What needs to be protected from outside voices?
• What needs more honesty, care, or repair?
• What have we allowed into the garden that may not belong here?

Every couple needs connection with others. But every couple also needs a sacred space that belongs only to them.

Overflow for Couples invites couples to notice the garden between them—what is growing, what is tender, what needs care, and what love is asking them to protect.

Because not everything sacred should have to survive in public.

08/05/2026

If you're a helping professional, I'd love for you to join me this Friday from 12:00–1:00 PM ET for an engaging conversation:
The Enneagram and the Spiritual Journey: Beyond Personality—What's Your Soul Seeking?

We'll explore how the Enneagram beyond personality typing as a pathway for deeper spiritual awareness, healing, and transformation.

This is also a great opportunity to connect with other coaches, therapists, spiritual directors, pastors, and helping professionals who are passionate about accompanying others on their journey.
Non-members are welcome for just $7.

Learn more and register here⬇️

If you're a helping professional, I'd love for you to join me on Zoom this Friday from 12:00–1:00 PM ET for an engaging conversation:

The Enneagram and the Spiritual Journey: Beyond Personality—What's Your Soul Seeking?

We'll explore how the Enneagram beyond personality typing as a pathway for deeper spiritual awareness, healing, and transformation.

This is also a great opportunity to connect with other coaches, therapists, spiritual directors, pastors, and helping professionals who are passionate about accompanying others on their journey.

Non-members are welcome for just $7.

Learn more ⬇️

07/24/2026

Grace makes room to pause.

Have you ever had the same conflict more than once?

The topic changes.
The timing changes.
The location changes.

But something in you knows the rhythm.

One person pushes.
One person retreats.
One person explains.
One person shuts down.
One person wants to solve.
One person longs to be understood.

What if the conflict is not only about the issue?

What if something in the head is reaching for certainty?

Something in the heart is longing for connection?

Something in the body is asking for strength, safety, or voice?

Grace makes room to pause.

To notice what is being stirred.
To welcome what is asking for attention.
To listen for the fear beneath the reaction.
To tend the sadness beneath the silence.
To hear the longing beneath the anger.
To let the body tell the truth with compassion.

This is not about blame.

It is about making room for honesty, tenderness, and return.

There is grace in learning to pause before the pattern defines the relationship.

There is hope in learning to return.

07/23/2026

Overflow for Couples invites participants to listen beneath the surface of conflict and begin asking, with grace:

What is my reaction trying to protect?

Couples do not only argue about issues.

Often, something deeper is being stirred.

One person may be reaching for certainty.
Another may be longing for connection.
Another may be trying to reclaim agency, strength, or voice.

Underneath the argument may be fear.
Underneath the withdrawal may be sadness.
Underneath the anger may be a longing to matter.
Underneath the control may be a need to feel safe.

This is why the work of head, heart, and body matters.

Our thoughts, emotions, instincts, and actions are always participating in how we love, protect, disconnect, repair, and return.

The goal is not to label one another.
The goal is to pause long enough to notice what each person is carrying — so love can become more honest, tender, and free.

Overflow for Couples invites participants to listen beneath the surface of conflict and begin asking, with grace:

What is my reaction trying to protect?

07/22/2026

Happy Feast of Mary Magdalene!

For those of you who don't know this little piece of my story, Mary Magdalene is the namesake of the parochial school I attended as a child. The Dominican Sisters who taught there brought Mary's story and legacy vividly to life for me. Because of their witness, I grew up seeing women as connected and effective leaders, faithful disciples, and powerful proclaimers of the Good News. In fact, I never realized that women were often limited by their gender until I reached adulthood.🤯

I'm deeply grateful for those early teachers who helped shape my imagination for what it means to follow Christ.

One of the things I love most about Mary Magdalene's encounter with the risen Jesus (spiritual director extraordinaire) is that he meets her with a question:

"Whom are you looking for?" (John 20:15)

What a profound question—and one that lies at the heart of spiritual direction.

You might consider asking it in your next spiritual direction session. Rather than rushing to answers, simply invite yourself—or your client—to linger with Jesus' question:

"Whom are you looking for?"

You may be surprised by what unfolds.

From wildfires to relational fires, from fractured fairy tales to untangling faith, we are living in extraordinary times. The need for grounded, wise, and compassionate spiritual directors has never been greater.

Do you have someone who serves as a Spiritual Director/companion for you? Someone who listens and asks beautiful and evocative questions?

07/21/2026

Free meditation resource from Crossroads Soul Resources.

May this practice help cultivate greater harmony—with God, within yourself, and in the love you share.

Becoming Aware

Healthy relationships are not formed only through better communication. They are also shaped by our willingness to notice what is happening within us.

This guided Harmony Meditation for Couples from Scott and Clare Loughrige offers space to slow down, breathe, and become aware of what is stirring in the head, heart, and body.

Together, couples are invited to reflect on:

The thoughts and stories shaping the relationship
The emotions and desires asking for attention
The wisdom and signals held within the body

Use the link below to this free meditation resource. Use it privately, with your partner, in spiritual direction, or as a resource for couples you accompany.

This resource is free to read and share:

🔗 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1r_RCV6luz2sVtYtD3LWXpgDHa00zGdzb/view

May this practice help cultivate greater harmony—with God, within yourself, and in the love you share.