11/20/2025
I’m struggling today after seeing the local video circulating of a young boy being viciously beaten and verbally abused by his mother. I feel compelled to comment as a psychotherapist. I see the attention this video has received, and perhaps this is an opportunity to offer clarity and context. Some may disagree, but what I’m saying is grounded in decades of scientific research.
What this mother did is not discipline. It is abuse—intimidation, fear, and violence. Discipline is the enforcement of rules with the purpose of teaching children how to navigate expectations and society. There are many healthy ways to achieve that. What is shown in this video is not one of them. And yes, there are severe long-term consequences, both mentally and physically.
I’ve seen comments like, “Well, I got it like that back in my day and I’m fine.”
Really? Are you?
Do you struggle with anxiety, depression, anger management issues, substance use, or compulsive behaviors? Do you use po*******hy compulsively? Overeat to escape? Find yourself repeatedly in unhealthy relationships? Do you deal with high blood pressure, heart disease, autoimmune disorders, migraines, or other chronic health issues? How has your work life been? Any brushes with the legal system?
A long history of data casts doubt on the idea that you’re “just fine.”
There is a well-documented connection between childhood physical abuse and long-term changes in the central nervous system (CNS) and overall neurological functioning. Survivors often notice shifts in how they process stress, emotion, memory, attention, and physical symptoms.
Physical abuse repeatedly activates the body’s fight-or-flight system (the HPA axis). Over time, this can produce chronic high cortisol—or later, cortisol “blunting”—which increases sensitivity to threat, makes conflict feel overwhelming, and makes it difficult for the body to calm itself. Survivors may experience fatigue, sleep problems, irritability, or chronic pain.
Brain imaging research consistently shows differences in key regions among people who experienced childhood physical abuse. The amygdala becomes hyper-reactive, heightening startle responses, anxiety, and hypervigilance. Early trauma can reduce hippocampal volume, contributing to memory gaps or difficulty retrieving memories.
Many survivors experience a nervous system that swings between sympathetic activation (anxiety, hyperarousal, anger, tension) and parasympathetic shutdown (numbing, dissociation, exhaustion). This is because their Autonomic Nervous System learned to adapt to unpredictable or unsafe environments.
Survivors also have higher rates of migraines, tension headaches, functional neurological symptoms (dizziness, numbness, “shutdown” episodes), chronic pain syndromes, and sleep disturbances. These symptoms are grounded in nervous system sensitivity—not imagination.
Chronic childhood stress increases systemic inflammation and alters immune functioning, contributing to digestive problems, chronic pain, and a host of cardiovascular and metabolic conditions.
And then there are the relational consequences: disrupted attachment patterns that make it difficult to form healthy bonds or choose safe partners. The erosion of trust, safety, joy, and peace.
Let me be clear: physical, emotional, and sexual abuse in childhood creates lifelong vulnerability to a wide array of challenges. It doesn’t just affect the individual—it affects society. Its consequences ripple into our healthcare system, legal system, educational institutions, workplaces, families, and communities.
Just because something “used to be done” does not make it right. And it does not make it effective. There are countless ways to set limits and provide consequences without damaging a child’s mind, body, or spirit.
Watching that video sent my own nervous system into a spiral of dysregulation. That reaction was my body signaling danger—an instinctive response to witnessing a child being treated as though he is unworthy of care, guidance, or dignity. It was grief for a young person whose sense of self-worth was being stripped away in real time.
This behavior has no place. Its consequences reach far too deep, and far too far.
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