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This is heart rending. I hope my friend Dr Alvin Abston can help

At age 8, my older brother s*xually abused me when my dad was supposed to be baby sitting me.
When I was younger my mom worked at McDonald’s all day, while my dad was supposed to watch over me, my two older brothers and younger sister. Instead, my dad decided to get drunk with his friends everyday in the afternoons. He left our oldest brother to take care of us. From age 8 until 11 he molested me. My older brother used to tell me that we would play “wrestling,” and then we would end up naked with him trying to insert his privates inside of me. He used to blind fold me, so I wouldn’t see what he was using or doing. Today, I can still smell the baby oil he used. One day while I was sleep I had a nightmare and when my parents woke me up, I told them about my brother. I told! And they laughed at me. My dad said, “How could he abuse you if I’m always home?” After my brother turned 18, he joined the army and I was so happy he was gone but when he would come home, he would be violent towards me. One morning he tried to fight me while I was in the shower because I was taking too long.
After that, I stayed at a friend’s house every time he came because my mom said she wasn’t going to kick her son out. Years later he moved to Detroit with his wife, had a son and a couple years after that, he committed su***de. I went to his funeral, even cried, but I was more so happy I survived him. But now I’m angry. Who is going to be held accountable? How come he has so much control, and why am I being told to let it go because I’m still alive? If he had no regard for life, he shouldn’t have tainted mine and I hope he’s rotting in hell. Thanks to my brother and another man who later abused me, I always look over my shoulder. I don’t trust people, and I have a hard time building friendships. I became promiscuous because s*x had no value. I made a lot of bad choices because I thought pain was love. I survived though, and I’m going to keep surviving. I just wish I could live. I wish I could see how my life would’ve been, who I would’ve been, and I wish I could remember how I was when I was 7, and go back to that girl.

Child molesters, please stop and seek therapy.
Parents, talk with your children.
Survivors, seek therapy.
(To share your story of abuse, message me)
www.TellSomebodyToday.org

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