Here We Grow Kids

During the holiday season, parents of neurodivergent kids are doing the MOST to help their kids keep it together and experience the magic of the season in their own way. But when family traditions include gatherings with people outside your “inner circle,” what can extended family members do to support your child’s needs?

I am proud to be able to contribute to this article on about supporting neurodiverse families during the holiday season. Thank you for sharing your perspective and teaching the community how to show up for their neurodivergent family members.

You can read the full article at the link in my bio and stories.

I am so honored to have played a small role in the creation of Big Orange Sky, a therapeutic story to support children affected by the LA fires by
 
When I first met the Gooshi team, we connected over the idea that stories are not only a valuable learning tool for children, but are also a way for them to feel seen and understood. A way for kids to feel important. The “big-ness” of these fires is so hard for little brains to comprehend, and at the same time, they know. Something happened.
 
Reading stories and telling stories is a way for children to make sense of the illogical. To face the scary parts. And to feel – not only worry and sadness and anger, but also brave and prepared and wise.
 
You can follow the link in my profile to download Big Orange Sky, which is available for two different age groups and in both English and Spanish.
 
Thank you to , , and for bringing this resource to life.

Parents spend so much time shopping and preparing for back-to-school, but how much time do you spend preparing your child? 🤔
 
As a pediatric occupational therapist, I often work with children who have difficulty with new things, changes, and transitions - I have found that all children can benefit from taking certain steps to prepare. Being clear with children about what they can expect helps them to understand what is happening, and relieves them of the stress of the unknown. The not-so-small side effect of knowing what to expect is that they know how to behave! 🙌
 
These four steps can help prepare your child for what’s to come:
 
✨ Preview
Explain where you’re going, what you’re going to do, and what will be happening, using developmentally appropriate language your child can understand. You might also read a book, watch a video, or view a tv show or movie.
 
✨ Act It Out
Next, incorporate your discussion into play – you can “act it out” using toys or you can play pretend.
 
✨ Tell the Story
Once your child is familiar with the overall activity, change, or event, talk more about what you will do step by step. You can incorporate a learning story or a Social Story, or for an older child, help them write out the story themselves.
 
✨ Repeat
The last step is simple – repeat these steps over and over again. This step comes naturally to young children who often use repetition as a means to process information. Help them to understand better by allowing your conversation to happen again and again over time.
 
How have you used this process with your own child? Leave a comment below, I would love to hear the strategies that work for you. 😉

Yes, it IS possible to share parenting advice and information without shaming!

I’ve noticed a bit of a trend lately... if this starts to stir up feelings for you, I hope you’ll stick with me til the end. I see parenting experts here on Instagram sharing information on totally benign topics - things that really, truly have no “best” way to be done. These are topics like praising your child, providing feedback, rewarding good behavior - maybe you’ve seen these too?

The trouble with these posts is, in my opinion, there is often a “side-eye” being cast in the direction of those who choose to use different strategies. However unintentional this may be, I think it’s important to consider that this may, unfortunately, contribute to parental guilt. 😕

I get it - you found something that works really well for your family and you want to share it with the world. I do the same thing! 😉 I also know that when you’re trying to condense a complex topic into a 15 second video, some nuance can be lost. But I still think there is a way to share what you have learned without shaming parents who may choose to do the opposite.

My concern is this - I have seen the negative effects of this first hand. A few weeks ago, I spotted a post from a distraught mom in an online group. “I KNOW I’m not supposed to tell my daughter ‘Good job,’” she said, “but sometimes I am so proud of her, it just slips out! Is that terrible? Am I raising her to be a people pleaser and seek approval from others?” It made me so sad to know that well-meaning advice was causing this mother to feel BAD for praising her daughter.

Parents, please please don’t let anyone make you forget - YOU are the expert when it comes to your child. For goodness sake, tell that baby “Good job” or give them a sticker if that is what works for your family. And parenting experts and influencers of all kinds, please be wary of the unintentional messages your content might be sending. We are all doing the very best we can. ❤️