MDV Life Coaching Services

MDV Life Coaching Services Helping couples thrive and flourish in order to avoid the pain and stigma of divorce.

This statement is so very true. We must prioritize our lives according to our value system. Lives can become so busy tha...
06/17/2021

This statement is so very true. We must prioritize our lives according to our value system. Lives can become so busy that the most important relationship can be neglected (not intentional).

Intentional quality time spent with your spouse will go a long way towards intimacy which is not just sexual, but pays dividends in your emotional love ❤️ bank.

How will you be intentional today?

What one thing can you do today to express love ❤️ to your spouse?

Marriage cannot and should not be a 50-50 mindset. Keeping score does nothing to encourage or foster growth and intimac...
06/08/2021

Marriage cannot and should not be a 50-50 mindset. Keeping score does nothing to encourage or foster growth and intimacy in marriage or any relationship. Only when we are 100% committed to giving our all to one another can true intimacy and growth occur.

What keeps you from giving 100% to one another?

How can you change it?

What is it worth for you to pursue true intimacy and growth in your marriage/relationship?

What steps are you willing to take now to move you forward towards true intimacy and growth?

06/07/2021

I am currently reading a book titled, "Helping Couples" authored and co-authored by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrot, and Dr. David H. Olson.

Today's reading includes the following quote, "In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find and continue to find grounds for marriage." (Robert Anderson) BOOM!!! Drop the mic!!! Powerful!

Of course this is barring any type of abusive relationship in which divorce would be grounds for ending the marriage. The intent is to address marriages who may just have become stagnant and couples who have grown apart for a number of reasons. A mindset shift towards staying married and developing strategies for getting out of the rut and growing back towards oneness can go along way in helping your marriage thrive and flourish.

What strategies can you implement in finding grounds for marriage?

How will you implement?

When will you implement them?

What accountability structure would you need to keep you on track for finding grounds for marriage?

For me, I will start with continuing to love my husband despite disappointments. I must first understand and accept that he is human and in his human frailty can make mistakes. In doing so, I let go of perfection and unrealistic expectations. I will hold myself accountable by keeping at the forefront of my mind that only God is perfect and can meet my expectations. This way, I don't put pressure on my husband to perform. I can let him be who God has created him to be and accept him for the gift he is in my life.

Your turn to answer the questions posed. Would love to read some of your ideas so feel free to share.

06/07/2021

“Seek first to understand, rather than be understood.”

A great statement to keep in mind whenever we think that our side of the story is the only truth. There are always two sides to a story and dare I say three. His story, her story, and then the truth. Perspective is nothing more than considering someone else’s point of view.

What keeps us from considering someone else’s point of view? For me, I believe stinking pride gets in the way. I want to be right. I do not want to give into the fact that someone else’s perspective could be right or different from mine. However, the key word being “different.” Just because someone’s perspective can shed light on seeing things differently doesn’t mean that I am wrong. It is just different. In taking on this mindset instead of a who is right or wrong mindset, we open ourselves up to possibilities in tackling relationship issues.

When I allow others to share their perspective freely without fear of being shut down, I am giving that person the gift of relationship building. Trust is established.

What is it worth to you to give this same gift?

How can you take the time to consider another person’s perspective?

How could doing so change the dynamic(s) of your relationship(s)?

How could you apply God’s word to help you build up others? Consider Proverbs 3:5-6 and mediate upon it.

What one action step could you take today that will help build up your relationship(s)?

This one is so very true.Would you wear a shoe that wasn’t the right fit? What would be the outcome of doing so? How cou...
02/08/2021

This one is so very true.

Would you wear a shoe that wasn’t the right fit? What would be the outcome of doing so? How could wearing that wrong fit shoe 👠 create problems for you?

The same is true in relationships. Why settle for someone who isn’t the right fit for your life? Food for thought.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MEOctober is a great month for you to embark upon a coaching journey. Why? Because it is my birthday m...
10/06/2020

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME
October is a great month for you to embark upon a coaching journey. Why? Because it is my birthday month!
I am offering 25% off my usual rates (does not include Premarital and Marriage Coaching). This special discounted offer is valid only from October 1-31 for the first three coaching sessions, with a signed contract, and payment in full. Don't miss out on this amazing opportunity.
Get on the road to moving Onward and Upward. Visit my website at https://velezlifecoaching.com and click on the “Contact Me” page to complete the form. I look forward to partnering with you on this journey.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MEOctober is a great month for you to embark upon a coaching journey. Why? Because it is my birthday m...
10/01/2020

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

October is a great month for you to embark upon a coaching journey. Why? Because it is my birthday month!

I am offering 25% off my usual rates (does not include Premarital and Marriage Coaching). This special discounted offer is valid only from October 1-31 for the first three coaching sessions, with a signed contract, and payment in full. Don't miss out on this amazing opportunity.

Get on the road to moving Onward and Upward. Visit my website at https://velezlifecoaching.com and click on the “Contact Me” page to complete the form. I look forward to partnering with you on this journey.

IntentionsHow would you define intentions?According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary intentions are; 1. What one intend...
09/24/2020

Intentions

How would you define intentions?

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary intentions are; 1. What one intends or has in mind as a purpose or a goal: plan. 2. A determination to act in a certain way: resolve.

How do good intentions play out in our day to day activities?

What distractions get in the way of you accomplishing your purpose, goal, or plan?

How can you assure that these distractions do not sabotage your well thought out and laid out purpose/plans/goals?

Here is food for thought:

Intention and healthy boundaries go hand in hand. First, healthy boundaries must be established in order for your intentions to be accomplished. If they are not set, your best laid out plan will not have a running chance. Second, when your priority list compliments your value system, then your day to day activities become focused. Then intention becomes action and action gets you moving forward in the direction of your purpose/goals/plans for life.

What keeps you from moving forward with your life intentions?

How can you implement the tips given?

Share your thoughts, ideas, suggestions with us. They may just bless another person today.

Have a great day.

09/08/2020

2020 has proven to be a challenging year thus far.

Many, including me, entered 2020 on January 1st with great expectations, dreams, hopes, goals, etc. Little did we know the extreme challenges it would bring. Amidst all of the challenges, many have become paralyzed with fear, doubt, uncertainty, etc.

I know uncertainty has knocked at the door of my heart. I had high hopes for many things this year and then Covid19 hit. All seemed to just stop abruptly. But as I wait, I pray and believe that God will work it all out for my good. My word for 2020 is trust. And oh boy is 2020 truly a test of that word and heart posture. But my God has been and will continue to be faithful as He provides for all of my needs (not all of my wants although He occasionally does that too).

I want to pose the following questions as food for thought (feel free to respond if you would like):

What prevents you from moving forward with your dreams/hopes/goals?

What thoughts have you entertained that have stopped you in your tracks?

How have these thoughts sabotaged your dreams/hopes/goals?

What relationship challenges keep you from growing?

How do you envision that growth?

What are you willing to do so that your relationship(s) grow?

What loss have you experienced lately that keeps you from moving forward? Loss of a family/spouse/child, job, dream, etc.

If you were to see yourself completely healed from that loss and moving forward, what would that look like for you?

What changes or action steps would you need to take now in order for your future self to be what you envision?

Any thoughts, comments, ideas? Feel free to share.

Have a blessed day.

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