Grief and Autism: Landon & Daddy

Love this....

The arms over the chest, lifting the t-shirt. So much discomfort… and then release. Oh boys.

Thank you, Annette Addo-Yobo, the newly-crowned Miss Texas 2024.
Thank you.

Preliminary Night 1 ✨💙 I waited to post my preliminary talent from Tuesday night until today. It is midnight going into Finals competition as I am writing this, and this talent explains my why. Autism awareness isn’t just a platform, it’s my life story. Being a caretaker and advocate for my brother taught me many things in life that have helped build me into the woman I am today. Yet it also taught me how cruel the world can be to young children who may not be able to advocate for themselves. The Miss Texas crown is much bigger than me. This crown is for every young child, teenager, and adult on the spectrum who felt alienated, abandoned, stereotyped, and unseen because of their different abilities. This crown is for l young immigrant girls who had to live a life different from everyone else because they were caregivers before they were students, friends, or teammates. This crown is for those who dare to be different. Thank you to everyone who has messaged me, came up to me and spoke to me, shared their journey with autism, and has wished me well since I performed my talent. It is always an honor to be a visible voice in the community. You all remind me of my why when I get caught up in the weeds. As I take the Miss Texas stage tonight, I hope to have a chance to show the Lone Star state my why one more time. I’m ready, are you? #misstexas #missamerica #misssouthlaketx

Dear William:
These are the loves of your life that I am honored to love, support, care for and protect for the rest of my life.
You are missed every day.💜
And yet...I see you every single day....in them. How lucky am I?
Wish you were here.
~ Stef

I love tangible resources that we can use!

The Secret to Understanding Sensory Behavior The Secret to Understanding Sensory Behavior! When the sensory system is off, the brain focuses on obtaining or avoiding those sensations!

This hits home.

❤

Love this!!💜

"Jon Jon’s happiness at his new job is contagious. He is such an inspiration." ❤️❤️ Reposted from @goodnews_movement (🎥:@wackdog_) . . . #autism #autismacceptance ##autismawareness #autistic #neurodivergent #inclusion #neurodiversity #autismacceptancemonth #autismawarenessmonth #inspiration #motivation

Landon: Mom, Dad died in heaven.
Me: Well, he died on earth, and now he is in heaven.
Landon: He's never coming back here.
Me: No, not to earth.
Landon: His heart stopped working.
Me: That's right.
Landon: He ran out of power.
(Pause. This was a deep thought to ponder. But for Landon, he just kept going. It was a matter of fact.)
Landon: Mom, I don't have to love Dad anymore.

Okay everyone...my initial thought/reaction was to squash this idea. I would never want my child to NOT love his Dad. But I hesitated. I reconsidered what exactly he MIGHT mean. Perhaps he was trying to express something different than I was hearing.

Me: Okay. So if you don't love Dad, will it hurt less?
Landon: Yes! It will hurt less. I don't want to feel like this anymore.
Me: Oh Landon, you are right....you hurt inside because you love Dad and he isn't here anymore. That is really, really hard.
Landon: I know.
Me: There is not really a good answer. Do you want to stop loving Dad?
Landon: No.
Me: Okay. So, know that the hurt means you love him a whole bunch, and that he is ALWAYS your Dad, no matter what.
Landon: He is my family in heaven.
Me: Yes, sweet boy....yes he is.

Some things never change. Thankfully.

Like the JOY of seeing your child (soon-to-be teen 😭) happier with the box than what was inside and the PEACE that comes from watching him sleep and pulling up the covers on him to give a little more comfort on a cold, snowy Saturday.

William....your presence is right there with me -- and most surely with him -- in those moment.

Wise words from Children's Music with Nancy Kopman!