01/12/2018
In this book called Darn Good Advice Parenting I found this letter that the author wrote for us parents to help us with our kids from 3 to 5 years
Dear Mommy and Daddy,
My imagination is vivid, so when it comes to play and learning, fewer toys mean so much to me. I don't need toys that replicate a house, airport, or grocery store, I can create my own spaces with tape, boxes, paper, and marking pens. Watch me play and you'll realize that my imagination-- Not the toys I'm holding dictates what I do.
Blocks, dress up clothes, a doctor kit, bandages, pencils, paper, a chalkboard, calculators, play computer, and clipboard help bring my ideas to life I enjoy toy cars and trucks, but then I'll use blocks to build roads, garages, and towns with the doll I have a patient, a student, and a secretary for when I played doctor, school, and office.
Here's what works best for me suppose after a trip to the market I say, " Dad, I want to make a grocery store." That's your signal to step in and help out. Save some used food cartons and cans, get out some grocery bags. I'll use a box for the cash register and make my own play money and credit and debit cards.
Once the grocery store is set up, let me keep it up for a few days. As the play goes on day-by-day all add items to the store to enhance my play time.
As I play, I'm putting together mental pictures of everything I've observed when we go shopping: Commerce, nutrition, food supply, and more. I am interested in becoming competent as I come and go into various environments. When I'm playing, I'm learning, and it's not a frivolous pastime--- It's what we preschool--aged children are programmed to do.
I also need a playmate my own age. With a friend, I can practice sharing, trading, and taking turns. We may fight and bicker, and when we do, just step in and help us solve the problem. My friend and I build on one another's ideas as we negotiate, problem solve, and play through various imaginative situations.
I really like to help with tasks around the house. Even though you can do any job faster and better, I feel important when I can feed the cat, set the table, and put away my dirty clothes in the hamper. But I need you to oversee, prompt, and remind me what to do.
When I build a fort, complete a puzzle, or draw a picture, let me know that you're proud of me. When I share toys and then put them away, let me know you're pleased.
I'm eager and ready to learn to dress myself, brush my teeth, put items where they belong, and prepare to leave the house with my coat and shoes on. My mind and body are ready to master these daily tasks, so expect me to complete them and do so consistently until they become positive habits that I will have learnt to do automatically.
Sure, I may test your rules, but family rules are still important to me. If you really want me to take my shoes off when I come in the house, enforce this rule consistently. Don't be wishy-washy and change your mind when I complain, whine, or pout.
Just don't make too many rules all at once. Gradually teach me more and more rules that are important to the family. You can even say, "In our family we sit at the table for 15 minutes to eat our dinner." I enjoy belonging to the family, so all usually go along with what we all do together.
Turn the TV off even though I may gripe. Deep inside I know I'm better off with less screen time as there are so many other fun things to do.
Please take my ideas seriously and don't laugh at me. I have lots of it initiative. If I can't use my ideas or if you put them down, I'll feel unimportant and discouraged, and my ideas may stop coming. You don't want this to happen, do you?
I need you to stop me when I get out of control. Don't let me hit others or damage anything, but do give me words to express my frustration.
Even though I'm growing bigger, I still like to sit on your lap every day while you read to me. There is no need to take away my beloved blanket or teddy bear. I won't take them to college, but for now I still need their comfort.
****I thought you might like to read this and it may help with parenting.**** š
