05/27/2025
This Memorial Day is rough.
I know my Dad was blessed with a longer life after his service.
He died suddenly & unexpectedly but not in physical combat for our country’s defense.
His life & therefore mine were forever changed by his time in the service in ways I knew but didn’t fully realize.
1. He met a chaplain, Ralph Porter who changed the trajectory of all of our lives by enlisting him in the Lord’s Army.
2. My brother explained this so well in his eulogy-as a teen my Dad was haunted by the upheaval he saw-& the horrifying needless loss of life. He said things to us like “That pilot who went down at 19 was a straight A student with such a bright future & now he will forever be 19.” Not someone he was personally close to, but these kind of existential reflections caused him to dedicate his life to the MOS of teaching teenagers & ministering to Veterans his age.
I fell into this career because it just seemed a natural fit because of him.
3. He LOVED this country. He deeply understood our flaws. He never hid them from us. He didn’t say this explicitly but in the way he loved my mom, us & this country he made us clear that a love that is blind to flaws isn’t really love, because you’re only loving an ideal version of the person/country that isn’t real. Equally true is that exclusively focusing on flaws is equally warped & wrong.
His sudden death from Agent Orange syndrome or a heart attack due to his parent’s exposure to 2nd hand smoke made this all too clear to me on another level:
The military gave him a way to break away from his parent’s unhealthy lifestyle & control, whatever layers of it I understand both physically & psychologically. I know he loved his parents & they loved my dad but they not only did not know Christ - they rejected Him. They were middle class Americans with a fairly deep rooted history here on his mother’s side & his father embraced the post war economic boom as a 2nd generation immigrant by working himself to death-literally.
my dad met Christ in giving himself in the service of our country during a misguided-pointless war, which also exposed him to toxic levels of Agent Orange.
So I love this country with all its flaws, & I grieve with those who grieve.