01/13/2023
Death and Dying to one's self.
Back in 2020, I wrote:
"There comes a time in our carefully laid out life as Believers when we stand in agreement with God that it is OK to leave this earthly vessel to be with him.
I don't know when that time will come for me, but I do believe (know) that there have been times when I felt I could have entered into that agreement with God.
I can't exactly recall what was happening around me or what led me to that place/posture. But what I do know is how I was feeling and what I was thinking. I can recall on several occasions when this has occurred, the feeling or desire to just LET GO.
I can also recall each time thinking, I'M TIRED. This is TOO MUCH. This is TOO HARD. I don't want to do this anymore.
But each and every time I had to make a conscious decision, a wilful and conscious decision to STAY ALIVE. Despite all circumstances that led me to that thought(s), moment(s), feeling(s), those desires...something internally (God/hope/love), whatever AND something externally, my children/ grandchildren/family/friends and PURPOSE yet to be realized, was stronger than the desire to die (death) and I chose LIFE."
Here are a few things I learned from those experiences of choosing LIFE over DEATH.
#1. It must be a conscious, unconscious, and subconscious choice we make every day to live our best LIFE.
#2. Timing, interior and exterior factors, and experiences impact our choices and decisions and the desire to stay or leave this earthen vessel (body).
#3. God's timing for our death can and will only be superseded by his love for us. By this I mean, we can only know the depth of his love when it is tried, tested and true by our prayers, faith, and trust in him.
