08/21/2026
Teaching Kids the Difference Between a Friend and a Friend Who Hurts
Your child comes home from school quieter than usual and says, "I don't want to play with them anymore," but they don't have the words to explain why. Learning to recognize healthy friendships is an important life skill that begins with helping children understand how friendships should feel. A good friend makes you feel safe, respected, included, and valued for who you are. A friend who is not treating you well may make you feel worried, embarrassed, pressured, left out, or like you have to change who you are to be accepted. Teach your child that a bad friend might ignore their boundaries, make fun of them, only want to play when they get their way, spread secrets, pressure them to do things they don't want to do, or make them feel small.
Help your child practice listening to their body by asking questions like, "How do you feel after spending time with that person?" and "Do you feel like you can be yourself around them?" Remind them that friendship should feel like a two-way street where both people get to share ideas, make choices, apologize, and show kindness. Role-playing different situations at home can help children practice what to say when someone is being unkind, such as, "I don't like when you talk to me that way," or "I want to play something else." Most importantly, create a safe space where your child knows they can always come to you without fear of being blamed or judged. Teaching children about unhealthy friendships doesn't mean teaching them to distrust everyone—it means giving them the confidence to recognize respect, set boundaries, and choose relationships that help them grow. The friendships they build today become practice for the healthy relationships they will create throughout their lives.
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