04/26/2019
Trust is not an easy concept. Between many people, trust is earned over many years of proof. You have shown your daughter that she can trust you in more ways than one. However, many times, the gestures we show are played out and redundant. They begin to play a small role in earning trust because they’ve become the norm and sooner or later, invisible. Have you ever felt like all of your hard work and sacrifices go unnoticed and unappreciated? This week, try this simple hack to begin to earn her trust.
Step 1: Go out of your way to buy her a fresh bloomed flower or a few.
Step 2: Think of one (non physical) characteristic that you love and appreciate about your daughter. (Very important: If you can’t think of one, ask yourself why. Then accept and understand that you can’t ask her to appreciate the things you do if you can’t find one think that you love and appreciate about her. It goes both ways.) Here are a few examples: charm, good heart, high energy in the morning, motivation towards…, love for animals, respect for friendships, ability to honor your goals, respect towards your friends, loving nature, good manners, perseverance in…, and appreciation of…
A Gesture of Love and Apprecation.
Step 3: Take the time to write her a hand-written note that includes “{Daughter’s Name}, This flower is a small gesture to let you know that I love you and appreciate you. Your {daughter’s characteristic} makes me smile and proud to be your mom (or dad).
Step 4: Don’t add anything else. When or if she approaches you with a thank you, just accept it, say, “thank you” and leave it alone. This is not the time or place to say, “yeah, but only when you…” or make her feel guilty or tricked. Silence is the best way to show her she can trust you. This note is very strategic. By handwriting it, you are showing her that she is important enough that you are willing to take time away from your day to send her a gesture of love. Also, identifying a characteristic in her will help her build her confidence and respectively teach her to do the same and how to appreciate others.
Step 5: Expect nothing in return.
You’ve got this Mom! Good luck and let me know how it goes!👇