09/23/2026
EVERY person is infused with sacred stardust, the stuff of Creation.
HOW TO TELL IF A CHURCH IS REALLY LGBTQ+ AFFIRMING
Finding a church that says “Everyone is welcome” is pretty easy.
Finding a church where LGBTQ+ people are fully affirmed, included and treated equally can be a little harder.
Unfortunately, some churches use words like welcoming, inclusive, or even LGBTQ-friendly while still teaching that same-s*x relationships are sinful, excluding LGBTQ+ people from leadership, or expecting transgender people to live according to the s*x they were assigned at birth.
So if you’re looking for a genuinely affirming church, here are 7 things to consider:
🏳️⚧️1. Look beyond “Everyone is welcome.”
Almost every church will tell you that everyone is welcome. The better question is: What happens after LGBTQ+ people walk through the door? Are they welcomed exactly as they are, or welcomed with the hope that they will eventually change?
🏳️🌈 2. Read the church’s beliefs - including the fine print.
Look at its website, statement of faith, marriage policy and denominational affiliation. Pay attention to language about s*xuality, gender, marriage and “biblical s*xuality.” Sometimes what a church believes about LGBTQ+ people is buried several clicks deep.
🏳️⚧️3. Find out whether LGBTQ+ people can lead.
Can an openly LGBTQ+ person serve as a pastor, elder, deacon, teacher, worship leader or ministry leader under the same standards as anyone else? Being allowed to attend isn’t the same thing as being fully included.
🏳️🌈 4. Ask about marriage equality.
Will the pastors perform weddings for same-s*x couples? Can those weddings take place in the church? Are LGBTQ+ marriages recognized and celebrated just as heteros*xual marriages are?
🏳️⚧️5. Don’t forget the T in LGBTQ+.
A church may affirm gay and le***an people while holding very different beliefs about transgender and nonbinary people. Ask whether trans people are respected by their names and pronouns and fully included in membership, ministry and leadership.
🏳️🌈 6. Pay attention to the answers you get.
You shouldn’t need a theology degree to figure out whether a church believes LGBTQ+ people are equal members of the community. If leaders dodge simple questions, give vague answers, or say, “It’s complicated,” keep asking or move on.
🏳️⚧️7. Look at what the church actually does.
Policies matter, but culture matters too. Are LGBTQ+ people visible in the life of the church? Are LGBTQ+ couples and families celebrated? Does the church speak up when LGBTQ+ people are being harmed or marginalized? Does it create a place where LGBTQ+ people can participate openly without hiding an important part of themselves?
A church can have wonderful music, friendly people, a great youth program and a pastor who gives inspiring sermons and still hold beliefs that can deeply wound an LGBTQ+ person.
LGBTQ+ people deserve more than a church that will let them in the door.
They deserve communities where they are loved, respected, celebrated and fully included exactly as they are.🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈
