10/11/2024
Personal Style and opinions of others.
Recently someone left a comment that I need help with personal style. Of course, the intention was to hurt me. And no, that was a miss. But I thought that it's a good topic to discuss.
Here we go:
There is a certain mechanism that makes us like or dislike visual things. And they all can be broken down to colors and lines. It all happens without us acknowledging it.
There are two parallel phenomena happening here. One of them I call Visual Harmony. This is actually what I teach at the Institute. When our brain recognizes enough similarities between colors and lines it signals that the object (whatever we look at) is harmonious, or "matches" and therefore looks good in simple words. This is universal. It works regardless of culture or personality.
Yet, there is another process in our head. And it's strictly subjective. We judge visual things by where they are similar or different to us. Yes, we do find to be beautiful those things that somehow are aesthetically connected to us. Specifically, to our faces. Therefore, you probably know a lot of couples with very similar facial features. I see them all the time.! We choose dogs that look like us and like clothes that we would wear ourselves. It's natural.
It takes a pretty advanced person to bypass personal likes and appreciate someone with completely foreign design.
This is why personal stylists who are not trained tend to dress people the way they dress themselves, wives dress their husbands in the clothes that they would wear if they were men and interior designers have a "signature design" that looks exactly like their own home.
Recognizing completely different aesthetics is a skill of taking yourself out of the equation. It's not for everyone.
It helps to be a very classic beauty. But if someone looks quite unique, we may easily not appreciate that look because it's very different from what we are.
I am fully aware that the way I look is too far away from anything classic. It has always been. Since I was 5. Few, who understand the theory of style would know that this is the only way for me to function successfully in this visual world. And, yes, occasionally I am accused of bad taste. I get advises on growing my hair or wearing "girly" things to look .. softer? I guess...
But can you imagine this face in a soft cashmere sweaters, cute round necks, classic white blouses? Right...
And I remember myself considering everything classic to be bad taste too. It was before I knew what Personal Style is and how it works.
So it's OK if someone criticizes the way we look. Don't take it to heart. Just look at the person who is trying to "fix" you and think of how indeed different you are.
