05/10/2022
💢How do you get out of a rut?
Feeling like you're constantly cycling in the same toxic behaviors
Always being disappointed with yourself
Or just completely numb to the pain you're causing yourself
I know it feels dark & lonely, but this is just the beginning of your transformation..
If you choose it to be
You have to learn how to truly FEEL what you're doing
FEEL the consequences, FEEL what you're causing yourself, FEEL what you're doing to others
Don't drown it in pity & doubt
Don't shove it deep down in yourself
Look at yourself in the metaphorical mirror & stop lying to yourself
If you want to get out of this rut, you have to face the darkest sides of yourself that are causing you to be where you're at
Take complete accountability
This is how you're going to get drive to get yourself out of the situation you're in
It's going to scare the hell out of you, & you will want to beat yourself up
But I encourage you to give yourself grace, but you do need to understand what you're doing
Then, actively look for ways to improve
Write a list of everything you want to change, & how you can change it
Don't expect yourself to do it all at once, just slowly start implementing on the list you created
Even if it's just one step at a time
Change takes time, don't sabotage yourself by expecting yourself to change overnight no matter how bad you want too
It'll discourage you from taking the necessary steps to grow
Eventually, all of those baby steps will turn into the reality you want for yourself
Just keep pushing forward, & if you need help, I encourage you to seek it out
Getting help is also a sign of strength, not weakness
03/29/2022
💪𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐬:
✔️Challenging yourself
✔️Loving yourself
✔️Listening to your intuition
✔️Letting go of toxic people
✔️Stepping out of your comfort zone
✔️& Progressing yourself
Something that would benefit people pleasers is stepping into leadership for themselves
That doesn't mean leading a group or a movement
It means doing what's best for yourself, even if it's uncomfortable
Stop living just for others, & live for yourself too
🙏For you are inherently the most important person in your life
You will always have yourself, through thick & thin
It's important to take care of yourself, love yourself, & prioritize yourself
& Challenge yourself to become better, in the smallest & biggest ways
✨That's how you become the leader of your life
03/22/2022
❎𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫.
That's unrealistic & too much pressure to put on yourself.
In fact, how do you even know if you have all your s**t together?
🤷Well the answer is, you'll never have everything in order in your life.
Each time you level up, new problems arise in life.
You will ALWAYS have to deal with issues out of your control.
🧩Being a true leader is about becoming a problem solver.
It's about ditching your victim mentality & handling any problems that come up.
Trusting yourself enough to face the inevitable & the unknown.
🏋️Leaders take radical ownership over anything that happens in their life.
They become resourceful & take on responsibilities that they didn't even need to take on.
When you come face to face with problems in your life, assess how you react.
❓Are you blaming outside forces or are you ready to just tackle it?
You have to be completely honest, don't bulls**t yourself.
It's okay if you have a tendency to feel like a victim, we all do to a certain extent.
🦸The difference is how willing are you to reprogram your mind to become the leader you want to be?
That means challenging every part of you that feels discomfort when dealing with issues.
Leadership is problem solving & being responsible.
𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 💪 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞
03/15/2022
✨𝗪𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞, 𝐲𝐞𝐭 𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩?
One that feels safe & comforting, yet thrilling & unexpected
Well, it takes a willingness to change & adapt WITH your partner
Listening to each other's needs, sharing your most vulnerable moments, giving each other tough love, & challenging one another in a healthy way to become better
👂It's putting aside your selfishness, & truly listening to your partner
But at times, you won't agree with one another, so you agree to disagree but at least try to understand their perspective
It's contrast that makes the relationship exciting
& Team work that makes it stable
I would also say one of the most important factors is to laugh with your partner
A LOT
Everyday
& To not nitpick at each other
Just be honest, but don't take your problems out on one another
That's how Jonnie & I keep our relationship alive
We love each other more than anything else, cherish each other, & remind one another how much we care
💝𝐈𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐲𝐩𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩, 𝐃𝐌 𝐦𝐞 & 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐭 & 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧
03/08/2022
💢𝐀𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐫𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞'𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮?
You're probably thinking, "no! That sounds narcissistic!"
Well, if you people please in hopes they'll love you more..
.then you are trying to control how they see you
It seems innocent, but you're trying to give so you can get something out of them
💝Which would be their love, acceptance, & attention
There's manipulation at play, even if that's not your intention
I know you're coming from a good place, but it's time to be honest with yourself
You may have a hard time expressing your true self because most women who deal with people pleasing normally have a poor relationship with themselves
They usually don't know who they are or how to deal with their own problems
🎭So, they provide for others to mask their own inner conflict
Problem solving for others instead of dealing with themselves
Therefore, you're not being your true self when you're around others
You want approval because you don't give approval to yourself
That's why you give & give in hopes you'll be accepted & liked
If you want to stop this cycle, you have to do the thing you're most scared of doing..
🙇🏼♀️.. & that is dealing with yourself
Going inward, recognizing your struggles & the things you've been suppressing
Begin getting to know yourself & form a relationship with yourself
Stop masking your problems & start healing
Give yourself the love, acceptance, & attention you're seeking from others
Because only then will you finally be free
✨𝐈𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞?
03/03/2022
😰𝗪𝐡𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐨 𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬?
You know how beneficial it'll be for you
But, you hold yourself back in fear they won't take it well
& When you do set a boundary, you don't maintain it
You're afraid if you reenforce the boundary, they will think you're being "bitchy", "bossy", or "too sensitive"
There's a lot of reasons why you feel this way, but the main reasons stem from your childhood:
1️⃣ As a child, your needs were neglected nor prioritized
2️⃣ When you vocalized what you didn't like or said you didn't want someone to treat you a certain way when you were young, it was either met with aggression or was completely dismissed like it didn't matter
3️⃣ You didn't feel loved enough as a child, & were afraid of losing loved ones approval so you did anything you could to receive love
5️⃣ You were raised to be a perfectionist & had to listen to what authorities said at all times to the point of having to dismiss your own feelings & wants
6️⃣ You went through traumatic events that damaged your perception of personal space & boundaries
7️⃣ You were treated like a doormat as a child & expected to cater to others needs over your own
These childhood experiences will still bleed into your everyday life if it continues to go untreated
If you resonate with some of these reasons, you know it's time to do some deep reflection & healing
Seek some guidance from someone who can help you overcome these experiences & teach you how to set & maintain boundaries properly
🤲If you want your power in your own hands, you need to set boundaries
02/28/2022
➡️𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐩𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝..
No matter how hard I have to try.
No matter how many times I fail.
🌌This is my MISSION, & I will see it out till the end.
I know in my heart that I will change so many women's lives with my life coaching.
It's not about me at this point, it's about all of you.
👥Everyday I'm striving to become better, because the more I help myself, the more I can help others.
I'm going to fulfill that longing I've had since I was a child.
& That is to do good for humanity.
🌎To help aid in the healing of this world as much as I possibly can.
I will admit this journey is full of ups, downs, surprises, hardships, the unknown, & it's very much uncertain.
But what I am certain of is my belief in myself.
☄️I have no doubt that I'll achieve what I'm setting out too do.
No matter if I get knocked down 1000x before finally standing on my own two feet.
I'm building the foundation of my own strength as I pursue this life coaching mission.
💫& Boy is it difficult, especially starting a business.
That's really tough for me.
But I love the challenge, I love seeing myself adapt & overcome.
🎇This has got to be the biggest catalyst for my self development.
This journey is stretching me very far, & it's testing every cell in my body.
Yet, I find comfort in knowing I will never give up.
✖️It's not an option.
Life is what you make of it, & I'm making it into everything I want it to be.
I'm manifesting my dreams, I know they're obtainable & I WILL make them into reality.
💙My trust in myself is too high for me to let myself down.
I know I got this.
Let's fu***ng go!
𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 ✨ 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐭𝐨𝐨
02/24/2022
✨𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 & 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐮𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐬 𝐤𝐞𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞
Something people pleasers often ignore because they don't completely know how to trust themselves
Sometime,s your intuition is telling you to let go of certain people, set boundaries, put yourself first, call someone out, ect
✖️& That's hard for those who suffer from people pleasing to listen to because they inherently don't want to hurt other people's feelings
So, they sacrifice their gut feeling in the name of others
But, that's only hurting yourself, & even others..
🩹Because when you allow people to get away with certain behaviors, you're letting them continue to hurt themselves & others
& You're teaching them it's okay to treat nice people like yourself in a harmful manner, even if that's not your motive..
When you tolerate people's poor behavior, you're saying yes to that behavior
🙏So, here's an exercise you can do to start listening to your higher self & intuition:
1. Find a quiet place where no one will disturb you. Somewhere you feel comfortable & peaceful at
2. Journal about your fears & struggles that are currently holding you back from making progress
3. Take 5-10 deep breaths, close your eyes, & meditate on your higher self who’s already learned the lessons you’re facing right now
4. Write down below your fears, the wisdom & guidance your higher self gives you
5. Begin implementing the guidance you've been given
6. Repeat anytime you feel stuck & need a push in the right direction
02/21/2022
🙍𝐘𝐨, 𝐝𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐚𝐬 "𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐞"? 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐧, 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐨𝐧 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠..
In society, we label EVERYTHING.
& Those very labels keep you trapped within limiting beliefs & self sabotage.
But if you break down the reason why you're insecure, you'll discover..
✖️- Deep rooted pain from societal norms & expectations
✖️- Being bullied & having mean words spoken to you/about you
✖️- A lack of love from family & friends
✖️- Being expected to be "perfect"
✖️- Being lost in life/not knowing who you truly are & what your wants & needs are
There are many reasons why you may be insecure & slapping that label on yourself doesn't give you the clear understanding of why you feel this way.
Breaking it down gives you so much more clarity on how to heal these parts of yourself that need the most love & attention.
💃Once you start healing these parts of yourself, you'll start becoming more confident & sure of yourself.
When I say "parts", I mean your subconscious actually tears off a piece of your whole self when something traumatic or scarring happens to you & designates that part to make sure that event/situation never happens to you again.
🗑️For example, if you presented a project to a class & someone yells out, "that's trash!", Your subconscious will rip off a part of itself & that part will more than likely try to prevent you from doing public speaking again.
That's how limiting beliefs & self doubt are formed.
When you have multiple "parts" of yourself, you'll feel unorganized, scattered, & you don't really know what your wants & needs are.
💢Sometimes these parts can take over your whole self at times which makes you feel very incongruent with yourself.
Your whole self is the pureness of who you are, it's your inner knowing & is your unique & divine soul.
So, make sure you pay attention to these parts that are making you feel insecure so you can begin healing & reintegrating them back into your whole self.
𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 ✨ 𝐢𝐟 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 "𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬" 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐞
02/18/2022
📣𝐂𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 &/𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐡𝐲𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬!
❌Are you fed up with prioritizing everyone else except yourself?
❌Are you done with letting people walk all over you?
❌Are you tried of not setting firm boundaries with yourself & others?
❌Are you upset with yourself because you aren't confident & sure of yourself?
✔️Are you ready to stand up for yourself & say no?
✔️Are you itching to put yourself first so you can flourish & have more control over your life?
✔️Are you wanting to express yourself authentically without fear of judgment?
Girl, full stop, you have no idea how much I understand where you're coming from
I too have dealt with all of this;
Not feeling like my voice was heard, being incredibly insecure, letting people use me, & not taking care of myself or even knowing who I was
This went on for YEARS, I mean most of my life
💢It wasn't until I hit my breaking point was when I realized I was the problem
I was the one letting things get that bad, & that's when I vowed I would do better for myself
I would do what's best for me, which lead me down the path of self development & progression
6+ years later, here I am, wanting to help you do the same
☝️I understand how frustrating it is when you don't feel like you have control over your life, so, if you're at your breaking point & ready to LEVEL UP like I was, I have something perfect for you..
I created a 3 month program called She Leads Mastery, designed specifically for women who are in similar boats like I was!
This program offers 1:1 weekly Zoom calls with me, curriculum that will teach you how to become the leader of your life, homework so you can implement what you're learning, & accountability from me!
Oh, & not too mention.. you'll have a LIFETIME access to ALL of the material!
Yeap, that way you can always have the program as a guide for THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!
How does that sound?
DM me or comment 🙌 if you want more info about SLM!
02/16/2022
👓𝐋𝐞𝐭'𝐬 𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞:
But first, let's understand why it hurts to be a people pleaser..
Your intentions are pure, your heart is big, your soul is called to help humanity, & you're a dope ass human.
So, you give give give & find yourself getting taken advantage of because you're just too nice to stand up for yourself.
You think the more you please, the more love you can spread.
😰But, then you feel confused & upset that people run over you without a genuine thank you afterwards.
Yet, you can't help it, you just keep pleasing. It's the only way you know how to share your love.
Well, let's think of this differently..
How amazing is it to have such a generous mission as wanting to help others?
Look around, it's obvious not everyone has that same mentality.
💝It's such a gift that you were blessed to have this quality.
When you have other's best interest in mind, you can become an unstoppable force of love & abundance.
You can help change this world simply because your soul chose to have this purpose.
How sweet is that?
Oooh! I hope this lights you up as much as it did for me when I was typing this!
So, what do you have to do to begin truly fulfilling your mission?
It's simple.
💃Prioritize yourself!
Sounds a bit counterintuitive but, I promise it's not.
Nourish yourself, build yourself up, set boundaries, stay consistent, vocalize your truth, become self aware, be confident, trust yourself, & above all, LOVE YOURSELF.
Love yourself just like you do your loved ones.
🎁Get to know yourself & find out all the gifts you have to share with the world.
When you progress in all aspects of life, you have so much more space to give to others from an authentic place.
& When you have protection like boundaries, you no longer have to worry about others taking advantage of you because you'll no longer tolerate it.
Work on yourself for others, & just as importantly if not, even more, do it for YOURSELF.
Be the change you want to see.
✨How are you going to nurture yourself today?
02/28/2022
02/24/2022
02/18/2022