Author Emily Nicole Jones

Everyone has a story, no matter how mundane it seems. What could you write about?

Goodwill- A short story

Goodwill has one mirror now that the fitting rooms are gone. It's in the corner and we wait in line.

I find a dress that smells like herbs and then like a cigarette, but only at the chest. The deep neckline, floral embroidery and ruffled sleeves are cute, but the texture of the fabric brings an audible gasp.

I place it back with reluctance, because somewhere, somehow, someone with a smaller ribcage than I will enjoy this dress at a garden party, someone who prefers things darker.

I take another dress with fabric that feels like straw in a crate of felted wool compared to the first, but it's black and unique and versatile.

(I say versatile as if it's favorable to be good at many things but not amazing at anything in particular. Versatile, confused, distracted, ever-changing, unfocused, all over the place. We're all somehow trying to fit in, whether we know it or not.)

I relive the painful "it doesn't fit moment" at the register when I pull my return from the paper bag. My stomach feels empty. I take the rest of my store credit in the form of a receipt and joke with the cashier "Oh! It's a 'keep-forever' receipt!" I pull a pen from my purse and write "Keep" across the top. I circle it for good measure. His response tells me he's skilled at conserving his own energy.

The paper bag feels awkward-- halfway folded, appearing empty. I wonder if i should carry it differenly but i wouldn't know how. Inside my bag is, again, something black-- black like the bodysuit I returned, black like my jeans, black like my shirt. At least it would fit in.

"This sun is too bright even with glasses," I think, as I move hair from my face. I hear paper whip from my purse, as the wind snatches my "keep-forever" receipt and sends it twirling. It lands, rolling with vigor toward parked cars and I call out in amusement, "There goes my forever receipt!" Then I laugh. I'm a child running through the parking lot. I watch the guy from the register beside me ride away on his bike, but he doesn't seem to hear.

To the moms: Sometimes being your best requires leaving the house a mess!
Sometimes being your best requires leaving the house! Sometimes being your best requires just simply being.

Yes!

This lady spreads joy by dancing on the streets every morning 💃 Meet the Billingham Dancing Lady - this is brilliant! 👏👏 BBC North East #Dancing #Teesside #Wholesome

I always think of my Nana this time of year, during the transition into fall, as this is the same month of both her birth and death. When I publish my memoir, this piece will be included. Thinking of Nana today.

Doors

Nana’s house smelled of wool, stale books and things I didn’t understand. I expected the floor to creak in that one spot and I memorized stains on the Eiffel Tower ceilings. The peeling wallpaper held stories not of mine. But if they were, I wouldn’t remember.

There were extra doors and extra rooms in the house, like I had in my head-- extra places people didn’t understand, where light never shined. Her extra doors were used by railroad workers before the house was hers. It was a boarding house. Every room had an entrance to the outside. There were lots of places to get inside Nana’s house, but the doors were never used anymore. They were locked, just like in my head-- doors to spaces no one used and places I never went. I saw the spaces in my dreams though, whispering secrets.

We had to go through two doors to get to the toilet on the back porch. I was comfortable, even though the driftwood snake stared at me when I closed myself in there. I wasn’t so comfortable with the old well in the yard. I never got close, but every child knows you need not be close to fall in and never be seen again.

After lunch my brother and I decorated stacks of paper and covered the walls of one of her extra rooms, the brightest room full of Carol Grigg paintings and everything Civil War. It became our art gallery, The Louver Museum of Oroville. Nana was the only visitor.

The most-used room was where I slept sometimes, but it was also used for sewing. I didn’t know how to sew but I liked to help Nana. My favorite job was cleaning the lint from the bobbin housing of her sewing machine. I sat in stillness with tweezers grasping at lint balls stuck between metal, pulling them until they became strands, thin, and then thinner until they tore. When they tore I was reminded of strained pieces of myself.

I worked with care so as not to use a shaky hand. There was no sound. Sometimes when we’re quiet our doors start to creak open, but I only thought of the space lit by the table lamp, not the dark spaces in myself.

Nana always told me how wonderful a job I did. When I was finished, it was, in fact, meticulous. I worked very hard at keeping it clean while making sure my doors stayed shut.

"If we give happiness to others, we will end up happy." But what I would add is: and if, first, we give happiness to ourselves, it will make it easier to give happiness to others...
What can you do for yourself that will help you shine brighter for those around you?

The presence I notice in the wide eyes and entire being of a young child is something that makes me tear up every time. I imagine, as I remember my own children as toddlers, the way they stare out into the open world with a wonder that has me grieving what I feel is a lost childhood. It’s hard to remember that experience growing up.

But what is important to me is that I’ve been able to re-learn how to be present and playful and inspired by all the bits and pieces of beauty and experiences this life and our world has to offer.

When people say to me, “I love your energy,” or “I wish I could dance so freely like that,” it reminds me that not everyone, and probably even hardly anyone, can remember what it is to have the energy of a child, nor do many people have the willingness to express it.

Have you ever considered reclaiming that piece of yourself? Have you ever dreamed of walking out into a new part of our natural world and gazing at it with the very same wonder that your children have?

It is my goal, that by the end of my book, mothers will be able to understand how to harness that calm and presence and wonder that our children so often demonstrate as we lead them through life.

When we learn how to harness our energy, stay present in each moment, and to guide ourselves deeper into an intentional way of joyful living, we find freedom there. We find beauty. We find purpose. When we connect with ourselves and allow our energy to flow freely, it’s from this place we can more readily access the “beingness” that children embody.

Does this topic interest you? Are you ready to live life from a joyful, childlike state, rather than the tired and overwhelmed state we so often find ourselves? I'm getting closer to publishing my book "Being Mom is Not Enough" and I'd love to hear from you! Comment below!
***To join my mailing list for very occasional book updates, please DM your email address, and I'll get you added.***
That's all for now... Stay IN JOY!

The presence I notice in the wide eyes and entire being of a young child is something that makes me tear up every time. I imagine , as I remember my own children as toddlers, the way they stare out into the open world with a wonder that has me grieving what I feel is a lost childhood. It’s hard to remember that experience growing up.

But what is important to me is that I’ve been able to re-learn how to be present and playful and inspired by all the bits and pieces of beauty and experiences this life and our world has to offer.

When people say to me, “I love your energy,” or “I wish I could dance so freely like that,” it reminds me that not everyone, and probably even hardly anyone, can remember what it is to have the energy of a child, nor do many people have the willingness to express it.

Have you ever considered reclaiming that piece of yourself? Have you ever dreamed of walking out into a new part of our natural world and gazing at it with the very same wonder that your children have?

It is my goal, that by the end of my book, mothers will be able to understand how to harness that calm and presence and wonder that our children so often demonstrate as we lead them through life.

When we learn how to harness our energy, stay present in each moment, and to guide ourselves deeper into an intentional way of joyful living, we find freedom there. We find beauty. We find purpose. When we connect with ourselves and allow our energy to flow freely, it’s from this place we can more readily access the “beingness” that children embody.

Does this topic interest you? Are you ready to live life from a joyful, childlike state, rather than the tired and overwhelmed state we so often find ourselves? I'm getting closer to publishing my book "Being Mom is Not Enough" and I'd love to hear from you! Comment below!
***To join my mailing list for very occasional book updates, please DM your email address, and I'll get you added.***
That's all for now... Stay IN JOY!

Writing to publish is beyond a creative endeavor. It's a personal goal deeply rooted in spiritual self-awareness. As I do this human thing, I realize, not only how overwhelmed I've been as a mother in this culture, but also how this human life is full of distraction and how sucked into that I am. I struggle with A.D.D. I realized recently (past year), but the only way to meet my accomplishments is to sometimes attempt forward movement without understanding how or when I'll see the light at the end. (Spoiler alert: there's actually light the WHOLE time! Yes, the whole time!) Is there even an end? ... or will that only prove to be a new beginning packed with new challenges and openings? Obviously, yes.

For now, I am happy to accomplish whatever I can accomplish as I am now-- exhausted yet excited, goal-oriented, yet needing mental rest, capable yet focused on fun. Creating fun is ultimately the end message this book project. After all, we are overwhelmed mothers. Creating and allowing fun for ourselves is an ongoing puzzle. So here I sit, with the promise of fun awaiting me long into the early morning, if I could just focus on this goal now, of completing this project... for myself but also for YOU.

Once we get real with ourselves on a new level, we can more easily understand the importance of self-reflection, self-acceptance and self-care, and all that entails. My goal in delivering these ideas is to provide struggling mothers (and anyone who feels lost or overworked) with the tools to be their B.E.S.T selves. When we understand the importance of breath, energy, support, and time, we can better integrate the self, by slowing down, guaging our effort, living in love and prioritizing fun. In these acts of self-love we come to meet freedom in a new light. Time to shine ✨️

Follow my author account for updates on my book projects if you don't already🙏💃

Dear Men:
I have faith in you. 100%
Thank you for showing up authentically in your strength. Thank you for being.