08/14/2024
To this site, with the most followers, I'm providing a video & realize my last name is right there, on the Writer Workshop binder for after school. The classroom is 313 & never knowing if I ever make the right decisions with where to go to school, where to live, what to be, I looked for signs & followed my gut.
It all worked out since 313 is where I'm from.
This video will lead you to all the spaces created in the past to contain the methodology or at the very, the difference in how I took notes, how I talked, how I was after violence, repeated & done publicly in one space, done privately in another.
These words PUBLIC or PRIVATE confusing, but I've worked on it & I know what names to share (the ones you get goods or services from, those that represent our best in each city like teachers, police & fire!) & which ones not to---them.
I do make mistakes so I own them, but twice, the universe aligned & made me double-check. One was an uploading video that had my name in it that got stuck & hadn't finished. I didn't recognize it, adrenaline went up & I didn't freeze, I did something. I deleted it. Phew. The 2nd time was when I said "ITs" name (I don't respect IT as anything, but now that's a pronoun to identify a person, so I don't mean any disrespect, but I've been using IT to say, "no respect" for way longer than identifying a person). Then, it turned to "I"ndescribable "T"rauma and when you can deSCRIBE it, it does dissipate, diminish, dilute & sometimes disappears!
This is the goal. To never think of them, be affected by them, be transported by them. Another pronoun. Just means "not us." When I typed in that word, the American flag would pop up & I will putting those pictures, the motivation to look up only by this symbol for independence & morality because we say the words to inspire kids & being a school teacher, the American flag and what the presidency means, must mean something. How we treat each other. How we represent the most vulnerable & at-risk population in any social setting (a school, a party, a workplace). How do you know you're American?
If you find the pages, it's a note-taking assignment. Also a typing in the magnifying glass section & last, a commitment to tapping which hurts my body & if you do all that, with my chronic pain, I can instantly trust you. Wait! That means nothing, but to an ignorant lizard-brain body, that's what IT means.
All the ways to rebuild trust after violence will be shared, but that doesn't mean you don't have ideas either. You don't have stories to share. You don't hope to one day not live with what I'm calling sensory on replay, or ptsd (pics, touches, sounds "diss"ordered because what you see, feel & hear simply honest match my own) better known as SHOCK & AWE.
Shock to the sensory. Awe at how easy this'll be since I got my words back & can hear my voice & why this video represents that. A BIG PERIOD to say, "I'm done. I won. I don't have to trust everyone."
:)
