Identity Recall Coaching

08/13/2026

07/30/2026

There are two voices inside every painful moment.

One whispers:
“Make this feeling stop.”

The other asks:
“What is this feeling trying to teach me?”

The first voice seeks soothing.
The second seeks healing.

Neither is wrong. We all need comfort.

The difference is what happens next.

Soothing without healing often becomes escape.

🍷 Alcohol
📱 Endless scrolling
🛍️ Compulsive spending
🍔 Emotional eating
🎰 Gambling
💊 Misusing medication
💔 Jumping into another relationship
💼 Overworking
🎮 Constant distraction

These behaviors don’t solve pain.
They temporarily reduce awareness of it.

Healing looks different.

✔️ Naming the emotion instead of numbing it.
✔️ Feeling discomfort without letting it define you.
✔️ Asking where the pattern began.
✔️ Setting boundaries instead of people-pleasing.
✔️ Seeking wise support instead of silent suffering.
✔️ Practicing skills that build resilience rather than dependence.

Escape asks:
“How do I feel better right now?”

Growth asks:
“How do I become stronger so this no longer owns me?”

One path offers temporary relief.

The other offers lasting freedom.

Healing isn’t about never needing comfort. It’s about choosing comforts that restore your life instead of quietly taking it away.

Which direction are your coping strategies moving you—toward escape, or toward freedom?

07/30/2026

There are two voices inside every painful moment.

One whispers:
“Make this feeling stop.”

The other asks:
“What is this feeling trying to teach me?”

The first voice seeks soothing.
The second seeks healing.

Neither is wrong. We all need comfort.

The difference is what happens next.

Soothing without healing often becomes escape.

🍷 Alcohol
📱 Endless scrolling
🛍️ Compulsive spending
🍔 Emotional eating
🎰 Gambling
💊 Misusing medication
💔 Jumping into another relationship
💼 Overworking
🎮 Constant distraction

These behaviors don’t solve pain.
They temporarily reduce awareness of it.

Healing looks different.

✔️ Naming the emotion instead of numbing it.
✔️ Feeling discomfort without letting it define you.
✔️ Asking where the pattern began.
✔️ Setting boundaries instead of people-pleasing.
✔️ Seeking wise support instead of silent suffering.
✔️ Practicing skills that build resilience rather than dependence.

Escape asks:
“How do I feel better right now?”

Growth asks:
“How do I become stronger so this no longer owns me?”

One path offers temporary relief.

The other offers lasting freedom.

Healing isn’t about never needing comfort. It’s about choosing comforts that restore your life instead of quietly taking it away.

Which direction are your coping strategies moving you—toward escape, or toward freedom?

To reset your path toward healing, book your free discovery appointment at IdentityRecall.com

07/19/2026

What does doing the work actually look like for you and where are you stuck? Book a FREE 30 Minute exploration call ☎️ to see if we’re a good fit for the next step of your healing journey.

06/05/2026

How much of your mental and emotional energy is spent on things that aren't actually happening?

Many of us live caught between two powerful forces:

**Focus** — paying attention to what is happening now.

**Fear** — paying attention to what might or might not happen.

For those who have experienced trauma, disappointment, loss, or uncertainty, fear can feel like preparation. But often it becomes a habit of rehearsing futures that may never arrive.

In my latest article, I explore a simple but powerful framework for **triaging your thoughts**—learning which thoughts deserve immediate attention and which ones are merely demanding emotional resources without offering solutions.

One question changed everything for me:

**"Am I faithfully facing facts, or am I fantasizing future failures?"**

If you've ever felt exhausted by overthinking, weighed down by endless "what ifs," or struggled to stay present, this article is for you.

Because peace isn't found by controlling the future.

It's found by returning your attention to what is true right now.



For the full article, click here: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/wheres-your-focus-what-chrystal-safari-roy-oepee

06/05/2026

Symptoms of codependency (or people-pleasing) sneak in while we’re busy trying to be KIND.

After all, isn’t it loving and thoughtful to help others be emotionally comfortable?

(Plot twist: yes, it is).

(Second plot twist: except when it isn’t).

Yes, it’s loving and kind to be thoughtful and considerate of others.

No, it’s NOT loving or kind to chronically silence our voice, downplay our own needs, or shrink ourselves down so that someone else will feel “comfortable.”

And yet some relationships (whether spouse, parent, family member, or friend) will regularly demand you shrink yourself in order to make them feel good.

And that’s not okay.

As in, they’re not actually asking you to be KIND to them.

They’re asking you to be CODEPENDENT.

And that’s not kind to you or them. Not in the long term, anyway.

So how can compassionate people tell the difference between kindness vs codependency?

It’s easy.

Our boundaries show us the way.

Except that most of us don’t know what our boundaries are.

But we can.

(And your true boundaries may not be what you think). ✨

❤️
Molly
Therapist-turned-boundaries-guide

PS - Want help?

If you would like to find out if you’ve been stuck in codependent patterns (and get boundaries that are loving, kind, and connective), my minicourse is here for you. And it’s free. 🥰

Get it here:
Https://boundaried.com/breakthrough 🦋

PPS - I’ve been having fun hand-drawing a little cartoon series on what codependent symptoms can look like for compassionate folks. If you’re new here, scroll through the cartoons on my page this past week and follow my page if you’d love to see more

06/01/2026

60 Days to Freedom

Day 1

Question: What am I blaming others for that is actually my responsibility to address?

Follow-Up: Where did I first learn to avoid responsibility by focusing on someone else’s behavior?

05/21/2026

Two sessions.

Not two years.
Not endless dependency.
Not “just surviving.”

Two sessions… and this woman:
• left the house for the first time in 9 weeks
• rode in a car again
• experienced beauty again
• slept a little after weeks of terror
• and reached day two without opioids

This is why trauma-informed coaching matters.

Not because someone is “fixed” overnight — but because the nervous system can begin to experience safety, hope, and possibility again when it is met with attunement, structure, truth, and compassionate accountability.

Healing often starts quietly:
A drive to the lake.
A deep breath.
A glimpse of life returning.

And sometimes the breakthrough is not dramatic at all.
Sometimes it’s simply:
“I left the house today.”

If you are struggling with fear, overwhelm, emotional shutdown, intrusive thoughts, trauma responses, or feeling trapped inside your own body and mind — there is still movement possible.

One safe step at a time.