Kid Of Character

Kid Of Character Welcome to Kid of Character – where identity meets purpose, and faith fuels the future.

We offer more than just family resources—we offer a movement that empowers families, strengthens identity, and shapes confident young leaders.

08/26/2026

“I can't be a victim to that all my life."

When I said that to my dad, I wasn't saying what happened didn't affect me.

It did.

There were years when I needed my dad and he wasn't there. There were milestones he missed, broken promises, hurt, and choices I made during those years that my life may have looked very different without.

Even my dad acknowledges that in this conversation.

But eventually I had to ask myself a different question:

How long am I going to allow a life circumstance to determine what I do next when I have the ability to do something different?

That's where responsibility became part of healing for me.

I can acknowledge that something happened to me without handing it authority over the rest of my life.

I can understand why certain patterns developed and still decide they don't get to continue.

I can recognize what I didn't receive and still become intentional about what I give.

And I can acknowledge that something wasn't my responsibility as a child while accepting that, as an adult, what I do with it becomes my responsibility.

That doesn't erase the wounds.

It doesn't excuse the person who caused it.

And it doesn't mean healing happens overnight.

It means there came a point when I had to decide that what happened in one part of my story wasn't going to be given permission to write the rest of it.

I wasn't responsible for what happened to me as a child. But as an adult, I became responsible for what I was going to do with it.

The Years We Lost... The Years God Restored.

08/25/2026

What I Really Needed From My Dad Wasn’t Money

There was a point in this conversation with my dad when I told him:

“Dad, I don't need your money.”

And I meant that.

Over the years, there have been times when I've felt like he was trying to compensate for what he missed.

Give more. Do more. Make up for some of those lost years.

And I understand the heart behind it much differently now than I probably would have years ago.

But what I wanted from my dad wasn't something he could buy.

I wanted him.

His attention. His commitment. His presence.

I think that's something worth remembering as parents.

Sometimes when we know we've missed something, broken a promise, worked too much, been distracted, or simply haven't shown up the way we wish we had, our instinct is to compensate.

So we buy something. We plan something big. We give them more.

And there isn't anything wrong with giving our children good things.

But sometimes what they're really asking for is much simpler:

“Can I have you?”

Sit with me.

Listen to me.

Show up when you say you're coming.

Know what's going on in my life.

Spend time with me when there isn't a special occasion.

Kids love gifts and money for the moment but the things they remember most is time invested.

I remember riding bikes with my dad.

Going to haunted houses.

Watching scary movies.

Cooking together.

Doing homework.

Just being Daddy's girl.

The Years We Lost... The Years God Restored.

08/24/2026

I heard, “You're just like your dad," quite a bit.

but it wasn't always being said as a compliment.

When there's hurt connected to a parent, we have to be careful about the way we talk about that parent to a child.

If I'm like my dad... and everything about my dad is being talked about as something bad... then what does that say about me?

There were absolutely things about my dad's choices that I knew I didn't want to repeat.

But getting older and healing has helped me recognize that, BREAKING AN UNHEALTHY CYCLE DOESN'T REQUIRE ME TO REJECT EVERYTHING I INHERITED FROM THE PERSON I WAS ONCE DISAPPOINTED WITH.

While my dad and I were talking, he started remembering me as a little girl. He talked about how determined I was, how I would get right back up and keep going.

Then he said something that caught my attention:

'You don't give up... I think you got that from me.”

And you know what?

He's probably right.

That determination is still very much a part of who I am today.

There are things I've had to leave behind. There are things I've had to heal from. There are choices he made that I WILL NOT repeat.

But there are also things I can look at now and say,

“Aye, I got that from my dad.”

And I love that.

Parents, especially when relationships are strained, we have to be mindful of this.

We can help our children recognize unhealthy behavior without teaching them to reject the person—or reject themselves because they see pieces of that person in who they are.

Sometimes breaking the cycle means leaving something behind.

But healing means realizing there were some things worth keeping.

The Years We Lost... The Years God Restored.

08/23/2026

There was a time when my dad and I had an extremely strained relationship.

There were many years that we lost. There was hurt, and as a daughter, there were things I didn't understand. Then I became an adult, had children of my own, lived a little more life, and some of what I thought I understood began to look different.

Not everything. Some things were still wrong. Some things still hurt.

My dad made some choices that had very real consequences for our family and for me. Drugs became a part of his life, and that addiction eventually led to him being absent from his family for years. By the time some things changed, there were parts of what had been lost that couldn't simply be put back the way they were.

I don't say that because I'm angry with him today. I'm not. But healing for me has never meant pretending those things didn't happen or changing the truth of what they affected.

Before all of that, though, he was my Daddy.

And somehow, after everything that happened between us, we eventually found our way back to having a relationship again.

A while back, my dad and I sat down and had a real conversation about all of it. We talked about what happened, what he remembers, what I remember, the years we lost and how our relationship changed over time.

We don't agree on everything.

There are parts of our story that he sees one way and I see another, but we've learned that we can agree to disagree and still love each other.

I think that's important because healing didn't require either one of us to rewrite the past until we finally came up with the same version of it. We had to learn how to hear each other, accept that there were things we experienced differently and still decide what kind of relationship we wanted to have moving forward.

That's one of the reasons I wanted to share this conversation.

Father-daughter relationships matter, and what happens in those relationships can follow a girl much further than childhood. It can affect how she sees herself, how she sees men, what she believes about relationships and even how she feels about the parts of herself that remind her of her father.

I remember hearing, “You're just like your dad,” and it wasn't being said as a compliment.

When a girl hears something like that enough, especially when there's already hurt connected to her father, she can start believing that anything about herself that resembles him must be something she needs to change.

I understand that because there were absolutely things I saw growing up that I knew I did not want to repeat in my own life.

But as I've gotten older, I've also realized that breaking an unhealthy cycle doesn't require me to reject everything that came from my dad.

Some things did need to stop. There were things I had to work through for myself, and forgiveness had its own process. But there are also qualities in me now that I can recognize came straight from him and say, “Aye, I got that from him.”

And I'm okay with that.

So this week, I'm going to share pieces of the conversation between my dad and me and talk about the hurt, identity, what we carry from our parents without always realizing it, and what can happen when we become so determined not to be like someone that we don't stop to consider whether everything we inherited from them was actually bad.

We'll also talk about healing and restoration because I know firsthand that relationships can change.

That doesn't mean every relationship should be restored. Sometimes boundaries are necessary, and there are situations where distance is the wisest and safest choice. Healing also doesn't mean pretending something didn't happen just so everybody can get along.

For me, I'm thankful I had the opportunity to heal what was wounded and rebuild a relationship with my dad.

I hope sharing some of our story this week benefits somebody else who may still be trying to figure out what to do with theirs.

The Years We Lost... The Years God Restored.

This is what I'll be talking about this week.

There was a time when my dad and I had an extremely strained relationship.There were many years that we lost. There was ...
08/23/2026

There was a time when my dad and I had an extremely strained relationship.

There were many years that we lost. There was hurt, and as a daughter, there were things I didn't understand. Then I became an adult, had children of my own, lived a little more life, and some of what I thought I understood began to look different.

Not everything. Some things were still wrong. Some things still hurt.

My dad made some choices that had very real consequences for our family and for me. Drugs became a part of his life, and that addiction eventually led to him being absent from his family for years. By the time some things changed, there were parts of what had been lost that couldn't simply be put back the way they were.

I don't say that because I'm angry with him today. I'm not. But healing for me has never meant pretending those things didn't happen or changing the truth of what they affected.

Before all of that, though, he was my Daddy.

And somehow, after everything that happened between us, we eventually found our way back to having a relationship again.

A while back, my dad and I sat down and had a real conversation about all of it. We talked about what happened, what he remembers, what I remember, the years we lost and how our relationship changed over time.

We don't agree on everything.

There are parts of our story that he sees one way and I see another, but we've learned that we can agree to disagree and still love each other.

I think that's important because healing didn't require either one of us to rewrite the past until we finally came up with the same version of it. We had to learn how to hear each other, accept that there were things we experienced differently and still decide what kind of relationship we wanted to have moving forward.

That's one of the reasons I wanted to share this conversation.

Father-daughter relationships matter, and what happens in those relationships can follow a girl much further than childhood. It can affect how she sees herself, how she sees men, what she believes about relationships and even how she feels about the parts of herself that remind her of her father.

I remember hearing, **“You're just like your dad,”** and it wasn't being said as a compliment.

When a girl hears something like that enough, especially when there's already hurt connected to her father, she can start believing that anything about herself that resembles him must be something she needs to change.

I understand that because there were absolutely things I saw growing up that I knew I did not want to repeat in my own life.

But as I've gotten older, I've also realized that breaking an unhealthy cycle doesn't require me to reject everything that came from my dad.

Some things did need to stop. There were things I had to work through for myself, and forgiveness had its own process. But there are also qualities in me now that I can recognize came straight from him and say, *Aye, I got that from him.*

And I'm okay with that.

So this week, I'm going to share pieces of the conversation between my dad and me and talk about the hurt, identity, what we carry from our parents without always realizing it, and what can happen when we become so determined not to be like someone that we don't stop to consider whether everything we inherited from them was actually bad.

We'll also talk about healing and restoration because I know firsthand that relationships can change.

That doesn't mean every relationship should be restored. Sometimes boundaries are necessary, and there are situations where distance is the wisest and safest choice. Healing also doesn't mean pretending something didn't happen just so everybody can get along.

For me, I'm thankful I had the opportunity to heal what was wounded and rebuild a relationship with my dad.

I hope sharing some of our story this week benefits somebody else who may still be trying to figure out what to do with theirs.

**The Years We Lost... The Years God Restored.**

This is what I'll be talking about this week.

08/22/2026

A conversation with my mom about bullying, faith, and borrowed confidence.

David stood in front of a giant who had intimidated an entire army.

His confidence wasn’t, “Goliath isn’t that big.”

It wasn’t, “This isn’t scary.”

The giant was real. The threat was real. David simply knew that Goliath was not the greatest authority standing there.

David knew who his God was.

Listening to this conversation with my mom helped me understand something about my own childhood differently.

She never pretended the bullying wasn’t happening. She knew I cried. She knew there were days I did not want to return to school. When necessary, she addressed what was happening and stood up for me.

At the same time, she refused to let the voices intimidating me become the final authority over my identity.

My mother knew who God was, and she kept reminding me who I was.

I’m not David, and my mother isn’t God. But I understand what can happen when someone anchors a child in an identity stronger than the voices trying to tear them down.

When I didn’t have enough confidence of my own, I could borrow some of hers.

That did not make the bullying hurt less. It did not mean I never cried or felt afraid. It helped me keep doing things even while I was afraid.

Sometimes our children need that from us.

This does not mean children should face bullying alone. Faith does not replace adult protection, responsible intervention, or accountability. We still have to listen, address what happened, and help make the situation safer.

But while we are dealing with what happened around them, we must also protect what is happening within them.

The giant may be real. The rejection may hurt.
The intimidation may shake their confidence.

But none of it gets to become the authority over who God says they are.

Sometimes children need to borrow our confidence until their own becomes strong enough to stand.

Listen as my mom and I reflect on what helped me keep going.

08/22/2026

Rejection Hurts—but It Does Not Get to Define Your Child

“Just ignore them” isn't enough when a child is being rejected, excluded, or picked on because of something that makes them different.

I remember what it felt like to cry, dread returning to school, and wonder whether the things other children said about me were true.

My mom did not pretend it wasn’t happening. She acknowledged the hurt, stood up for me when necessary, prayed with me, and kept reminding me who I was.

Sometimes our children might need to borrow our confidence until they can rebuild their own.

That doesn’t mean the bullying won’t hurt. It means the pain does not get the authority to redefine who and whose they are.

Listen first. Help them grieve what they hoped the friendship would be. Address the harmful behavior. Then keep reminding them:

“What happened was wrong—but it does not get to tell you who you are.”

The bullying may hurt your child, but their worth can never be decided by people who refuse to see it.

08/21/2026

One child says something cruel.

Another laughs.

Someone repeats it.

Someone pulls out a phone.

Another sends it to a group chat.

Before long, one child's humiliation has become entertainment for several people.

We'reteaching our girls to understand that being a bystander still involves a decision.

We're not telling them to fight anyone or put themselves in danger.

But you also don't have to help the harm grow.

Don't laugh.
Don't record.
Don't forward it.
Don't add another comment.
Don't spread the rumor.

Get help when help is needed.

And if it's safe, sometimes simply walking beside the child who has been singled out says more than a speech ever could.

One of the things my mom and I talked about was how different bullying can become with technology.

When I was growing up, a cruel comment might happen at school and I could at least go home.

Today, a recording, screenshot, group chat, rumor, or shared post can follow a child right through the front door. A humiliating moment can spread to people who weren't even there when it happened.

That's why the child who watches matters so much.
This applies to cliques too.

There is something I want children to understand clearly:
You get to choose your friends. But you don't get to destroy someone because they aren't your friend.

Not every child has to be invited to every sleepover, group, or friendship.
That isn't realistic.

But exclusion becomes something different when children begin using gossip, humiliation, threats, digital sharing, or group pressure to make another child feel worthless.

Character asks a different question:

What am I using my influence to create?

Sometimes the fastest way to stop a crowd is for one child to decide not to become part of it.

08/20/2026

“WHEN MY CHILD IS THE ONE CAUSING THE HURT”

This may be the harder side of the bullying conversation.

What happens when the child who hurt someone is our kid?

It's easy to become defensive.

“My child would never do that.”
“There has to be more to the story.”
“What did the other child do first?”

And yes, I absolutely want to know what happened.

But if my child caused harm, protecting them from accountability isn't protecting them.

Character requires truth.

Maybe she made the comment, joined everybody else in laughing, intentionally excluded someone, or intimidated a child because she knew she could.

I don't need to shame my child or convince her she's a terrible person.

But I do need to help her face what she did.

What happened? How did your choice affect that person? What part belongs to you? What needs to be repaired? What needs to change next time?

And after a recent conversation with my mom, I've added another question:

“What's going on with you?”

Because sometimes there is something underneath the behavior.

Anger. Hurt. Jealousy. Insecurity. A desire to fit in. Something they've heard or seen somewhere else. Maybe they're carrying something we don't even know about yet.

That may help me understand the behavior.

It does not excuse the behavior.

That's the balance I want us to hold.

Accountability asks, “What did you do?”

Wisdom also asks, “What's going on with you?”

If I only punish what happened without becoming curious about what may be feeding it, I might stop today's incident without helping my child change what produced it.

And that's what I'm after.

Not humiliation. Not defending wrong behavior because she's mine.

Growth.

An apology matters, but changed behavior is what eventually gives that apology credibility.

We're not raising children who will never make a bad choice.

We're raising children who can tell the truth about what they did, accept responsibility, repair what they can, and learn to choose differently the next time.

🚂 Track Check:
If I found out my child was hurting another child, could I love them enough to face the truth with them?

Stay on the Right Track.
—Marsha Garrett | Kid of Character™

08/20/2026

There is a side of bullying that belongs to the parent too.

The parent who has called the school. Talked to the teacher. Talked to the principal. Asked questions. Tried to advocate.

And then tomorrow morning comes...and your child still has to go back.

In this part of the conversation with my mom, she talks about what she remembers trying to do when I was being bullied regularly.

Listening to her now, as an adult and a mother myself, gives me a different appreciation for what she was carrying.

She couldn't control everything that happened once I walked through those school doors. But she kept trying to figure out what she could do.

I think that's something parents need to hear.

You may not be able to fix everything immediately.

But you can:

Keep showing up. Keep listening. Keep documenting. Keep asking questions. Keep advocating.

And while you're working to change what's happening around your child, keep reminding them of what's true about them.

They are loved. They have value. They are not facing this alone.

—Marsha Garrett | Kid of Character™

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