Kurt Bubna

Kurt Bubna Author. Coach. Columnist. Event Speaker.

What do you do when God seems silent?I’ve heard people say, “Just follow the peace.”That sounds wonderfully spiritual. B...
09/02/2026

What do you do when God seems silent?

I’ve heard people say, “Just follow the peace.”

That sounds wonderfully spiritual. But what if you don’t feel peaceful?

I doubt Peter felt particularly at peace climbing out of a perfectly good boat and stepping onto the water.

I doubt Israel felt warm and fuzzy standing at the edge of the Jordan River.

Sometimes faith feels less like peace and more like, “Okay, God…I sure hope I’m going to survive this.”

We’re also told, “When God hasn’t given you clear direction, use wisdom.”

Good advice.

But what about those seasons when you’re praying for wisdom, and begging for direction, and heaven still seems strangely quiet?

I’m learning that the silence of God does not mean the absence of God.

Sometimes there is no flashing neon sign from heaven. No angel with a memo. No unmistakable voice telling us exactly what to do next.

Sometimes we pray. We listen. We seek wise counsel. We search Scripture. And then, with trembling knees and an uncertain heart, we take the next best step we know to take.

Solomon wrote, “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” Prov. 3:5-6

Notice it doesn’t say, “Understand everything and then trust.”

Trust comes first.

And here’s what gives me hope: God is bigger than my ability to make a perfect decision.

Even when I’m trying to do the right thing, I can miss or misread something and make a wrong turn. But I am still held by a Father who is kind, good, gracious, and ridiculously patient and good toward His kids.

His silence doesn’t mean He’s gone.

And an uncertain step taken while trusting Him is still a step of faith.

“Faith is not the absence of uncertainty. It is trusting God in the middle of it.”

So pray. Listen. Seek wisdom. And then take the next step.

You don’t have to see the whole road.

You just have to trust the One who does.

UnshamedMy worst moment is my truest nameI refuse to believeGrace can rewrite what shame has writtenI am certainI will a...
09/01/2026

Unshamed

My worst moment is my truest name
I refuse to believe
Grace can rewrite what shame has written
I am certain
I will always be the sum of my mistakes
I cannot believe
God still calls me beloved
I know
My scars are proof that I am ruined
I refuse to believe
There is beauty in what has been broken

—————————

There is beauty in what has been broken
I refuse to believe
My scars are proof that I am ruined
I know
God still calls me beloved
I cannot believe
I will always be the sum of my mistakes
I am certain
Grace can rewrite what shame has written
I refuse to believe
My worst moment is my truest name

Why do I write?“We tell ourselves stories in order to live.” Joan DidionI’ve been thinking about that line.Why do I keep...
08/31/2026

Why do I write?

“We tell ourselves stories in order to live.” Joan Didion

I’ve been thinking about that line.

Why do I keep putting my thoughts out there on social media? Why write columns, articles, and books?

Is it arrogance to assume my words matter? Is there some pride involved?

Probably. I’m human. I have an ego, and occasionally it gets out of its cage and runs amok.

Maybe some of it is legacy. At this stage of life, you start thinking a little more about what you’ll leave behind. But I don’t think that’s the main reason I write.

I write because stories help us make sense of this beautiful, painful, confusing thing called life.

I’ve had some amazing moments. I’ve also screwed up. Badly. I’ve hurt people and been hurt. I’ve known success, failure, faith, doubt, shame, loss, forgiveness, and more grace than I deserve.

And I’ve discovered something along the way.

When I’m willing to tell the truth about my story, somebody almost always says, “Me too.”

That’s why I write.

I don’t have all the answers. I haven’t figured life out. In truth, the older I get, the more I realize what I don’t know.

But maybe something I’ve learned the hard way can help somebody else.

Maybe my scars can give someone hope.

Maybe my story can remind somebody that failure doesn’t have to be final.

Didion was right. We tell ourselves stories in order to live.

I’d add this: We tell each other our stories so none of us has to live or feel alone.

That’s why I write.

If something I’ve lived through, learned the hard way, laughed about, cried over, screwed up, or found grace in helps even one person feel a little less alone, then the words were worth it.

I want my words to point toward hope. Toward healing. Toward grace.

And toward the stubborn reality that no matter how badly we’ve blown it, God is still writing our story.

Starting over can feel overwhelming.I know.There have been seasons when I’ve looked around and thought, “This is not whe...
08/30/2026

Starting over can feel overwhelming.

I know.

There have been seasons when I’ve looked around and thought, “This is not where I expected to be at this point in my life.”

Plans changed. Relationships changed. I changed.

Some of those changes were beyond my control. Some were the consequences of my own poor choices.

That’s why I love this quote from Mel Robbins: “Don’t be afraid to start over again. This time you’re not starting from scratch. You’re starting from experience.”

I’ve made mistakes. I’ve failed. I’ve hurt people I love. But I’ve also learned some things the hard way (which apparently is one of my spiritual gifts).

I’ve learned more about grace, humility, and forgiveness. And much more about my desperate need for Jesus.

God has a remarkable way of taking even the broken pieces of our stories and using them to shape us and help others.

Paul wrote: “Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal…” Phil. 3:13-14

“Forgetting” doesn’t mean pretending the past didn’t happen.

It means learning from it. Owning what needs to be owned. And grieving what needs to be grieved.

Then take the next steps covered by God’s mercy and grace.

Maybe you’re rebuilding after a broken relationship, a failure, a dumb mistake, or a life you never expected.

Starting over doesn’t mean starting from zero.

Yes, you’re bringing some scars with you. But you’re also bringing wisdom, experience, perspective, and hopefully a deeper dependence on Jesus.

And by the kindness of God, I’m still learning, growing, and not finished yet.

Neither are you.

I wonder if getting older would bother us a lot less if we had a better perspective.Think about what happens when you’re...
08/28/2026

I wonder if getting older would bother us a lot less if we had a better perspective.

Think about what happens when you’re sitting in an airplane at 40,000 feet.

Everything looks different from up there.

The traffic disappears. The houses look tiny. Mountains that seemed enormous from the ground become part of a much bigger landscape.

Perspective changes things.

Maybe we need that same 40,000-foot view when it comes to aging.

Because here’s the reality: we’re all headed in the same direction.

Nobody is getting younger. And yet we live in a culture obsessed with youth.

We fight the wrinkles, cover the age spots, color the gray, and try to disguise whatever gravity has decided to mess with.

I’m not against looking your best. Trust me, I’m hanging onto whatever hair I have left.

But when did getting older become something we’re supposed to dread?

Those wrinkles mean you’ve smiled a lot.

The gray hair means you’ve been around long enough to learn a few things.

Mark Twain said, “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”

I’m still working a bit on the “don’t mind” part. But I don’t want to waste whatever years I have left wishing I were younger.

I want to live them.

Fully. Gratefully. With my eyes on the future.

Because from the 40,000-foot view, getting older isn’t just about having more years behind me. As a follower of Jesus, I’m also one day closer to Home.

I’m not in a hurry to get there. I’ve still got people to love, books to write, places to see, and some dreams left to accomplish.

But I’m also not afraid of where this plane eventually lands.

So bring on the wrinkles and gray hair; they are evidence I’m still here.

And someday, because of the grace of God, I’ll be There.

That’s a pretty good perspective.

Sometimes it’s little things that result in big problems.For about 30 years, I’ve dealt with back issues on and off. Eve...
08/27/2026

Sometimes it’s little things that result in big problems.

For about 30 years, I’ve dealt with back issues on and off. Every now and then, my back decides it has had enough, blows out, and I’m pretty much incapacitated for two to five days.

About three months ago, we moved out to the country. Since then, I’ve done FAR more with my back than I probably should have. Lifting boxes. Moving furniture. Working around the property. Doing all the things a 69-year-old man probably shouldn’t be doing.

Other than some occasional tightness, my back has held up remarkably well. No major incidents. No days flat on my back staring at the ceiling and reevaluating all my life choices.

Until today.

I bent over to put on my socks and shoes…

…and POP!

Seriously. Just doing a little thing.

I wasn’t moving a refrigerator. I wasn’t lifting a 70-pound box. I wasn’t wrestling a bear. (Although we actually had a black bear wandering around our neighborhood yesterday, possibly displaced by the fires in the mountains.)

Nope.

I was putting on a shoe.

Of course, I know it probably wasn’t just the shoe. Sometimes it’s the accumulation of a hundred little stresses that finally shows up in one seemingly insignificant moment.

And I suppose that’s true about more than backs.

Sometimes we handle the big stuff surprisingly well. We get through the crisis, survive the move, carry the heavy load, navigate the hard season…

…and then some stupid little thing takes us out.

Maybe the lesson isn’t terribly profound.

Maybe it’s simply this: We’re human. We have limits. And ignoring those limits doesn’t make them disappear.

I’m reminded of Psalm 73:26: “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

Sometimes the flesh fails.

Sometimes while putting on a shoe.

I don’t particularly like being reminded that I’m not 39 anymore, but humility comes in all sorts of packages. Apparently, mine came in size 11 today.

So I’ll rest. I’ll heal. I’ll get back up.

Because getting knocked down is part of life, but staying down doesn’t have to be.

I typically don’t jump on the social media bandwagon, or write about something just because it is trending.But Dolly Par...
08/26/2026

I typically don’t jump on the social media bandwagon, or write about something just because it is trending.

But Dolly Parton was different. She always amazed me.

Not just because of the voice, the songs, the hair, the rhinestones, or a career that lasted my entire life.

I admired Dolly because she seemed remarkably comfortable being Dolly.

She embodied one of my favorite Brennan Manning quotes: “Be who you is, or you is who you ain’t.”

Dolly knew who she was.

She could laugh at herself. She was outrageous without apology, enormously successful without taking herself too seriously, and generous in ways that went far beyond writing a check.

And now she’s gone.

Apparently, Dolly had been ill for a while, and her battle with cancer was relatively brief. But publicly, she certainly didn’t appear to be someone nearing the end.

Just six days ago, she accepted an ACM award virtually, talked about songwriting and future projects, and said things were going well medically.

And at 80, Dolly still somehow seemed…well, Dolly. Larger than life and almost indestructible.

Maybe that’s why this one feels so shocking.

But after all the tributes fade, there’s something worth remembering.

None of us owns our next breath. Not Dolly. Not me. Not you.

Moses prayed, “Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” Psalm 90:12

That’s not morbid. It’s reality.

So love people while you can. Forgive sooner. Say what needs to be said. Stop putting off the things that matter most. Laugh more. Live Dolly bold.

And for heaven’s sake, quit wasting your limited days trying to become somebody God never created you to be.

Be who you is…

Because someday, sooner than any of us would like to imagine, our number will be called too.

Thank you, Dolly, for the music, the laughter, the generosity, and for reminding us that there’s something pretty wonderful about simply being yourself.

You were one of a kind.

My sin cost me a lot, but it cost Jesus everything.My failure cost me friendships, relationships, trust, respect, opport...
08/25/2026

My sin cost me a lot, but it cost Jesus everything.

My failure cost me friendships, relationships, trust, respect, opportunities, and a reputation that took decades to build.

It cost me sleepless nights, countless tears, and consequences I still live with today.

I’m not minimizing any of that.

Sin always leaves a trail of brokenness.

But here’s the beautiful truth that changed my life: At the cross, Jesus willingly paid a debt I could never repay.

He didn’t excuse my sin. He absorbed its penalty.

Because of that, I no longer have to wear the label sinner as my identity.

Yes, I have sinned.

Yes, I still fall short.

But that is no longer who I am.

I am a son.

A child of God.

Forgiven and redeemed.

Completely and absolutely loved.

As followers of Christ, we don’t pretend our failures never happened.

We don’t deny our weaknesses or excuse the ways we still need to grow.

We confess them honestly because grace has made honesty safe.

Our past may explain us, but it no longer defines us.

Our failures may humble us, but they no longer own us.

Scripture reminds us, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” (2 Corinthians 5:17)

I live with a new identity.

As Henri Nouwen once wrote, “The great spiritual task facing me is to accept the truth that I am radically loved by God, and that nothing I do can change that love.”

If you’re in Christ today, don’t keep introducing yourself by your worst chapter.

Introduce yourself by His finished work.

Because your sin may have cost you much…

But Jesus paid for it all, and all means all.

This morning, I sat quietly and listened.A pair of great horned owls, a male and female, were calling to each other. Mou...
08/23/2026

This morning, I sat quietly and listened.

A pair of great horned owls, a male and female, were calling to each other.

Mount Hood and Mount Jefferson on the horizon, with Jefferson glowing in the early morning light.

A woodpecker stopped by the pond for a drink. Mountain bluebirds and chickadees seem to be everywhere.

A male and female jackrabbit wandered through this morning too. Life is everywhere.

Somewhere in the distance, a rooster is announcing the morning, whether anyone asked him to or not.

And after the strong winds last night, everything is almost eerily still.

I love mornings like this on the ranch.

There’s something about watching the sun rise over the mountains, listening to the birds, and sitting in the quiet that settles my soul and fills me with joy.

Especially when I remember…

My Father made all of this.

“For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities…have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made.” Romans 1:20

Sometimes worship is simply paying attention.

Sometimes the hardest part of waiting isn’t the beginning.It’s wondering if you’ll ever get to the other side of waiting...
08/21/2026

Sometimes the hardest part of waiting isn’t the beginning.

It’s wondering if you’ll ever get to the other side of waiting.

You’ve prayed. You’ve trusted. You’ve tried to be patient. You’ve told God, “Your timing, not mine.”

And you meant it.

But then weeks turn into months. Months sometimes turn into years. Nothing seems to change, and if you’re anything like me, eventually you start wondering, God, did You forget about this? Did I miss something? How much longer, Lord?

I’ve been there.

Actually, in some ways, I’m there right now.

Waiting for answers. Waiting for restoration. Waiting for things I can’t force, fix, or control.

And I’m not particularly good at waiting.

Isaiah wrote: “But those who wait on the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles.”
Isaiah 40:31 NKJV

Notice it doesn’t say those who wait will always get what they want, when they want it.

It says they will be renewed.

So, maybe God is doing something IN us while we’re waiting for Him to do something FOR us.

C.S. Lewis once wrote, “I am sure that God keeps no one waiting unless He sees that it is good for him to wait.”

I wish I liked that quote more than I do.

Because waiting is hard. Especially when what you’re waiting for matters deeply.

But I’m learning that faith isn’t just trusting God at the beginning of the wait. Sometimes deeper faith is trusting Him when you’re tired of waiting, and there’s still no finish line in sight.

If you’re somewhere waiting today, don’t give up.

Name what you’re waiting for. Pray about it again. Then, as best you can, open your hands and release the timetable to God.

Waiting doesn’t mean God is absent. And a delay doesn’t mean He is done.

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Bend, OR
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