Tanai Milgram Coaching

09/19/2022

07/21/2022

Your Invite to The Unapologetic Workshop 07/31 🌹 (It's FREE!) -

I write to you from Mexico City where I’ve been living for the past month. I’ve been loving it so much! So many tacos to eat, museums to visit, streets to walk and people to meet.It’s been lovely!I write to you with a special invitation:Back in February, 23 women joined me for a free 3 hour wo...

01/04/2022

I used to be a big proponent of faking it ‘til you make it. It helped me many, many times to get friends or get through a hard day.

Now my question is, why fake it?

Fo example, why not just tell someone I’m feeling insecure or unsure or scared?

There were so many scenarios were I thought it was the MOST shameful thing ever to admit that I’m feeling insecure. Especially in dating. I had stories in my head like:

You won’t be attractive if you’re not confident. At least pretend to be confident and they’ll still get turned on.

Feeling insecure is not s*xy. It’s weak and childish. If you don’t fake confidence in s*x you’ll kill the s*xual chemistry.

Admitting that you’re not sure you can do something at work puts you at risk of not being trusted.

Now? I’m like naaaahhh.

Doesn’t mean playing the victim. Actually I’m realizing as I write this that as long as I was sharing my insecurity with shame it was going to be disempowering.

It is so liberating to have total acceptance of whatever comes up inside me, and share it knowing it’s totally ok for others to see it. If they don’t like it, well I’m triggering something in them they don’t have acceptance for, and maybe I’m meant to be in their life to trigger it for them.

Either way, no one can take mine or your sense of freedom and peace of knowing you have nothing to hide.

The longer you make it about THEM, the longer you’re giving your power away.

What would you say for the sole purpose of having peace of mind? Of having what’s in your head, heart, mind, and outward expression match up?

It takes some trust to just know it even if you can’t see it, that everything will turn out fantastic when you prioritize yourself.

I also wanted to share that in retrospect I see how depression has helped me not give so many f*cks. There have been many times where I feel so low and apathetic, I don’t even have it in me to care about something that seems so small at the moment like what people think. Depression has sometimes been a blessing in disguise.

01/03/2022

Might have shared this before but I once had a client ask me for coaching around impostor syndrome/fears of not performing at work. I asked him what he’s afraid would happen and he said, “I’m afraid they’ll find out I’m a f*ck up, how do I get over that?”

So I asked, “well what if you are a f*ck up?”

*silence.

“Tell me, what kind of things do you just LOVE to f*ck up?”

He laughed and slowly, he started coming up with things.

The rules at work.
The rules he learned growing up about dating.
The conventional ways of doing things.
The way he didn’t like the company was being run, or the way government was being run.
The limitations he puts on himself.

Suddenly he found it boring to not f*ck s**t up.

He connected with the power of f*cking everything up, not the weakness or people’s judgements.

He took out the monster out of the closet, looked at it right in the eyes, and laughed. The monster wasn’t scary anymore.

This “f*ck up” story totally lost power over him and he felt a totally new sense of freedom to be himself at work without constantly needing to judge whether he was f*cking up or not.

This is how I’ve helped clients face and love the parts of themselves that they’re afraid of vs. run away from them or try to change them.

What are the monsters in your closet that could use a hug? 🤪

Sound like the kind of inner freedom you’d like to feel?

Shoot me a DM if this resonated with you!

01/02/2022

How I help my clients radically shift the way they feel about their “self-sabotage”:

1. Name the judgements they have and release any stuck emotion. Feel it to heal it, name it to tame it.
2. Understand that the pattern of behaviour was developed out of love to protect them when they were very young, and it’s still that young part showing up.
3. Feel and express love and gratitude for that little part of them. Apologize for disowning that part so it feels safe and seen.
4. Whenever it shows up, not resisting it but witnessing and celebrating it instead. The less resistance, the less it persists.
5. Access a deeper sense of wholeness and love for themselves when they realize there is nothing to change and only everything to love.

Need some support in freeing yourself from
the self-judgement and self-sabotage ?

DM me and we can walk through this process on a free discovery call!

12/31/2021

2022 ✨💕🔥❤️:

To letting go of the attachment of success or being liked.

To saying yes to everything that life throws at me.

To meet it all with eyes of curiosity.

To letting go of victimhood and effort.

To being compassionate with myself and others.

To letting go of what defines me

To falling wildly in love.

To letting go of anything that weighs me down.

To having what I show on the outside match what is on the inside.

To being in a constant state of surprise.

To having fun and surrounding myself with people I deeply love.

12/28/2021

Was I running away from intimacy or did I just not have a desire anymore?

Every time I’ve broken up with someone, it’s been because I genuinely didn’t want to “be” with them anymore. I felt it in my heart that our soul contract was complete.

I don’t think if I wasn’t afraid of intimacy that these relationships would’ve lasted longer. I think each one lasted exactly as long as it was meant to.

My work has not been about making my relationships last… but feeling more and more in touch with myself and my truth.

There were so many times I pretended to feel something I didn’t, so many times I felt so guilty about my desires or lack of, so many times I didn’t share my truth because I didn’t want to look bad, so many times I put off saying I wasn’t feeling good in the relationship anymore because I didn’t know how to say it or wasn’t sure if I could trust my feelings.

I was making myself wrong all the time. I wasn’t running away from relationships, I was running away from being vulnerable, being seen, being myself, opening up, expressing my desires, being messy, being crazy and too much…my truth.

And that is exactly what I help people with. Sometimes clients will say “if I was in a relationship I’d be happy,” so I ask, “is everyone you see in relationships happy?”

No, because happiness is up to us ultimately, not others or anything outside of us.

I want you to feel like you’re getting closer and closer to living in alignment with your truth, single or with a partner.

So if you want to be with someone you feel safe and have total approval being yourself and sharing how you feel with them.

And if you don’t feel good in your relationship, you feel the approval to voice that so you can feel good, or trusting that voice that says “let go.”

12/27/2021

Here it is!!

Mark your calendars for January 10th to listen to these heart-open queens’ deepest desires and needs!

Not so long ago women’s voices weren’t heard which is a reason why it can be so hard for us to even know ourselves what we want. So let’s hear what these ladies have to say.

Participants will get to have all their vulnerable, honest, juicy questions answered about topics we rarely slow down to talk about in which is what I think dating and relationships is so frustrating right now!

We’re not entering partnerships for obligation or need anymore, we date because we want to. Partnership is for our own love and transformation and this is all evolving so fast.

If we’re not aware of what we need and want then we’re all just playing a very frustrating guessing game. 😅 So let’s talk about it.

Link for tickets in my bio 🔥

12/25/2021

I desire to be touched firmly and be grabbed unto on by lower back.
I desire to be spanked and bit and scratched
I desire to be held by an unwavering gaze that makes me melt.
I desire to be surprised with gifts and flowers.
I desire kisses that last hours, without realizing the time passing by.
I desire to hear whispers in my hear that I’m beautiful.
I desire to play like a child with curiosity and silliness.
I desire to spend all night tangled in someone’s body.

It feels so edgy to share these desires out here, so I knew I had to😉

Last night at the Christmas party I went to I got to hear some of ’s desires and share some of my own and we were both GLOWING and feeling so full afterwards.

Isn’t it so invigorating to read desires?

What do you feel when you read mine?

12/24/2021

You asked…we listened!

We’re taking the conversation even deeper in January and having our next panel focus on what men crave in S EX!

Can you think of a better way of starting 2022? 🔥

I was thinking the other day how we have lots of s*x in TV and movies these days…but 0 CONVERSATIONS about s*x.

We never see characters talking about their turn ons, what they want, what they don’t like, or having conversations before s*x about consent, boundaries or turn ons. And these are the s*xual images we get flooded with and learn from.

Let’s talk about it!

Join us for a very juicy and intimate conversation about what these guys are craving for in s*x.

Link to the tickets in my bio!

If you attended the last panel, check your e-mail for a promo code :)

12/24/2021

The past couple of days I’ve gotten to talk to several friends who are at very low lows for all kinds of reasons and suffering.

My heart feels for them.

And I noticed how good it feels to feel them.

They feel so open.

They feel so soft.

I can connect to their hearts more than ever before when they were powering through and trying to keep it together.

It feels so good to feel someone at the point where they don’t want to fight anymore, because they couldn’t even fight if they tried.

I’ve been there, at points where I’m so depressed or so exhausted that I can’t force or push or try anymore. I genuinely stop giving any f**ks.

Life will keep giving us opportunities to come back to our truth, to come back to our hearts.

If you’re in a low, or next time you find yourself in love, I welcome you to surrender into it. I believe there is such an intelligent plan to it all, and these lows are meant to break down whatever we have in the way to being connected to our truth, so we can stop looking for it outside of us.

That’s why I love the quote by Rumi “You have to keep breaking your heart until it opens.”

Happy Holidays🎄! May you find the freedom in the lows that break you open to receive more love. ❤️