Scott McElroy

Sharing openly sucks and you shouldn’t do it.

Here’s why:

Alright, so my writing coach says that I need better hooks at the beginning of my posts, so if I got you this far, consider reading on and liking/commenting below, so we can prove him right (he loves being right) and I can continue to justify my investment with him (bc he ain’t cheap).

Because the truth is, I actually value sharing tremendously.

I just stopped in public and took a picture of myself (like a quasi-dumbass) because I value sharing so much.

Why?

Well, for one, I always feel better after doing it.

A client and I just finished an early morning session downtown, and I briefly shared some of my own personal experience with him, and boom.

I felt better.

Lighter. Less tense.
More open. More seen and understood.
(And frankly, I know he did too).

We didn’t split the atom.

Didn’t solve any problems.

And no, neither of us suddenly knows everything.

But what I do know for sure is that post-sharing, something always unfolds that makes us feel better.

Secondly, and you know, these things might be related, but sharing always helps me connect more with others.

And as someone who has felt deeply alone and misunderstood at times, feeling connected is also something I value highly.

With my family.
With my friends.
With my colleagues.

I absolutely love feeling locked in with those around me.

And when I simply open up and embrace the fear of sharing what’s true for me, I’m able to actually create these powerful connections again and again in my life.

And lastly, when I feel my best and my most connected, you know what else I need?

Not a damn thing.

As some clinical psychologist might say, I am fully resourced.

I have everything I need to create/achieve any damn thing I want to in my life.

II’m clear and I’m connected.

And when I’m clear and connected, I start feeling pretty confident.

Powerful, even.

Which means, my goals are already here.

The game is over before it started.

Fear has lost - I already won.

All from simply (yet, bravely) opening up and sharing what was already true in the first place.

I hope this is valuable for you. ✌🏼

Relationships are the key.

The ultimate secret sauce.

- No matter what you do in life..

- No matter how much money you make..

- No matter how impressive your body or your job title is and regardless of how nice your house or next vacation is..

Without great friends, family, lovers and colleagues in your life, it’s all for not.

There will be no lasting joy.

No genuine fulfillment.
No art worth creating.
No business worth starting.

No show worth watching or trip worth taking.

Sadly, no actual life worth living.

This doesn’t mean that real joy and fulfillment can only be experienced around others. Of course, not.

I personally love being alone at times.

But what it means is that to ever actually arrive at the place where you genuinely love being alone with yourself, great relationships will have had to lead you there in the first place.

This is because real joy and fulfillment in life can only exist when you truly know yourself.

Like, all of yourself. The whole thing. The past, the pain, the shame and the darkness in its entirety.

The parts that you so desperately act to hide or deny from yourself and others - which are always the most painful parts, but also the most beautiful and the most powerful ones as well.

The parts that shine so brightly and burn so intensely that it overwhelms us on our own.

And thus, we must share them with others..

We must allow them to see us and help us make sense of our own pain and beauty..

OR face the life-numbing consequences of not.

The anxiety.
The addictions.
The loneliness.

The self-inflicted suffering of refusing to open and connect with the people we feel deep down that we’re supposed to in one way or another.

So if you were waiting on an invitation to open more with someone around you..

To be more honest and vulnerable with the intent to strengthen a relationship in your life..

Or maybe even take that first scary step to get some help that you know that you need..

Then here you go.

As someone who was once right there in the worst way, take that leap and do that sh*t.

The best parts of life are on the other side.

👑✌🏼

When she turns 35 tho..🥵

In all seriousness, it’s a month of celebration for the greatest of all time .

IYKYK. Happy birthday, boog.

Love you so much - thanks for being you. 🐐🤞🏼

Connection is everything.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​In your family, in your business - in your life as a whole - the quality of your experience is largely dictated by the quality of your connections.

And the quality of your connections is directly correlated to the quality of your communication.

Thus, it's super f*cking important that you actually get better at talking.

Which is why I made this list of quick tips to help you do just that.

1. Show up ready to really listen.

Your goal is to connect - not project your thoughts and feelings onto others. Start by asking caring questions and intentionally listen to their answers.

2. Speak for Yourself Using “I” Statements.

It honors yourself and provides valuable direction for others to actually connect with you. Say things like, “I am, I feel, I think, I want, etc”

3. Specifically Establish How You Feel.

If you never establish how you feel, you can never expect others to actually connect with you - because part of you clearly doesn’t feel safe enough to actually connect.

Establishing how you feel helps others meet you where you actually are.

4. Specifically Ask for What You Want.

So many of us are so afraid of the potential rejection that we never actually just ask for what we want. When the truth is, simply asking for specifically what you want/need is often the best path toward getting it.

You’re worthy of having what you want and you’re allowed to ask for it.

5. Use the Language You Have.

We can only improve our communication if we “use the words we have,” so be kind to yourself, take imperfect action, and say it however you can.

I hope this is valuable for you.

Creating peace is a skill.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​Because chaos is always available.

So is sadness, anger and fear.

You can literally always allow yourself to be engulfed in these feelings if you want to.

Life is chaos.

- Devastating sadness.
- Raging anger.
- Paralyzing fear.

These are all parts of us whether we like it or not.

And in certain moments of life (even certain seasons of life) embodying these emotions is 100% the appropriate response.

In fact, if you ever want to truly experience peace, you must first do exactly that.

Peace is not the absence of sadness, anger and fear.

It is the acceptance of them.

The allowance of them.

The integration of them - into the rest of your life where there is also joy, safety and connection.

Pretending the darkness isn't there is not peace.

Avoiding the darkness that's there is not peace either.

The truth is - the darkness is real.

The pain is real.

Sadness, anger, fear and the chaos they can sew in our lives when unchecked is very real.

And yet, so is peace.

Amidst all of the chaos.
Amidst all of the pain.
Amidst all of the darkness.

Peace, too, is always available for us to choose.

But only if we are first willing to allow the darkness to be true, to be accepted, and to be intentionally integrated into our lives in a way where there is balance and understanding.

I hope this is valuable for you.

Thanks to for the candid.

Hey y'all.

I made a workshop on healing anxiety & addiction.

Not only is the cycle of these things something I've dealt with personally, it's also one of the most common things I see with my clients.

Thus, I made a 40 min. video workshop (with downloadable worksheet) teaching exactly what I teach my clients on how to begin actually changing your experience with these things.

It's currently on sale for $25

and you can access it right here: https://bit.ly/3M5uC0D

I see you & I appreciate you all.

Anxiety & Addiction Workshop A 42 min. live video workshop to help you heal anxiety and addiction in your life.

Life so nice right now.

- Kiddos are amazing. Always leading me new places, teaching me new things and keeping me grounded.

- and our relationship probably the single greatest blessing of my entire life. And there are genuinely so many blessings - but man, she’s special-special.

- contrast therapy at the village with my guy - one of a kind great man.

- the first of many OffSite Retreats was life-changing for all involved I think; I know it was for me. Appreciate you, , & 🍽️🤞🏼

- so many genuine, fulfilling relationships with so many genuine, fulfilling men (re: goons) in my life rn.

- and yesterday I ran my first marathon. Hit 28 mi total and could’ve done more honestly. Most I’d ever ran prior was 15, and I’m reminded that doing something that I honestly didn’t think I could do is always a feeling worth keeping around.

Couldn’t have done it without .tx and - appreciate y’all so much. 🐐

Like I said, life is good - and it feels even better allowing it to be so and even celebrating it. 🙏🏼

Come to grow or don’t come at all. 🙏🏼
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There’s 4 spots left and you’re invited.
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Feb. 2nd, and I are taking 10 men with us into the Texas Hill Country for a weekend of powerful growth & intentional connection.
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In between Executive Coaching sessions and Group Workouts, we’re going to have chef-prepared meals, cold-plunge & meditation sessions and plenty of intentional recovery & chill time on the property.
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(Yes, there’s a pool, the weather says 60s & sunny and yes, there will be a ping-pong tournament that I expect to win).
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Also, yes, there will be powerful, vulnerable sharing taking place.
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We’re going to dive head-first into fear, sadness & anger and we’re going to name & claim the anxiety, the addiction & the loneliness that’s present.
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Why?
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So we can create more room for joy. For peace. For power. And for freedom in our lives in every way.
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We head into the woods (yes, to a beautiful Airbnb) and into the pain not for fun, but for greater depth & connection in our relationships, more peace & clarity in our minds, greater strength & energy in our bodies & more financial freedom & security in our lives.
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Growth is about strength.
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And there is strength in numbers, in connection amongst the group, and that is exactly why we’re hosting this retreat.
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💪🏼 Yes, a lot of real work will be done.
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😈 Yes, a lot of real fun will be had.
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👑 And yes, if you’re a guy and you’re ready to grow in this way, you are invited to join us.
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You can signup via link in bio.
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I see you & I appreciate you - see you soon. 🤞🏼
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📸: the one and only
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This is why great connections are so important.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​Because without them, you will inevitably see yourself as the unhealthy connections in your life have seen you, which is always "less than" in someway.

Not enough. Not capable. Not worthy of the love, attention, power and freedom that the unhealthy connections in your life undoubtedly couldn't give you.

But a real gang around you is everything.

The small group, the inner circle, the squad, the boys', the team, THE GANG (my favorite) that makes you feel safe and strong and valued is simply part of the required prescription when it comes to truly changing how you see yourself and thus, how you create, perform, produce and show up in the world.

Bc simply put, the way that the people around you treat you will directly impact HOW YOU SEE YOU (on a conscious and subconscious level).

And nothing will dictate your life - your career, your relationships, your body, etc - more than the way that you see you.

So start letting go of the ones in your life who really ain't for you (you'll know) and start creating great relationships with people who reflect back to you who you want to be.

Hope this is valuable for you.

Bang bang - have a great day!

As always, thank you .




🔑

You are the Sun.

bright and smiling,
warm, yet deadly.

a ferocious love.
unseen until
it’s too late.

you left me in pieces.
ravaged by warmth.
destroyed by love.
and still you shine.

brighter.

=

Happy birthday, Jenna. ☀️

Nothing makes me want to write like you.

Thank you for being you, I love you so much. ❤️

Join me on Zoom this Friday, Sept 1st, at 11:30am.

Register for free using the link below: https://bit.ly/anxaddlvworkshop

Healing Anxiety & Addiction Learn How to Take Control of Anxiety & Addiction Forever