Peter Ng Training Consultancy

The year 2015, the date 25th April. The venue is Yogyakarta. It was such a privilege to speak alongside with Dr Hashim - a man filled with humility yet full of wisdom and grace. He spoke on Integrity in Business and I speak on leadership. That day, not only I meet a friend, but a man of integrity. Thank you, Dr. Hashim.

Blessing you and your family a HISSing Year! 🍍🍊🧨🧧🐍

HARVEST - Bountiful harvest overflowing with wealth and Prosperity.
INVIGORATING - Blessed with greater health and full of energy.
SIGNIFICANCE - A year filled with important and meaningful achievements.
SMOOTH - A joyful year free from perceptible projections.

HUAT AH!

Love & Blessings
Peter, Feliz, Jairus and Christabel Ng 🐍🧨🧧

Watching sunrise is a daily inspiration.

The 3 most important benefits of watching sunrise:

1. Boost in immunity. Observing sunrise can have a positive impact on your mood and overall wellbeing. It stimulate the production of serotonin in the brain which helps elevate your mood and increases positive emotions, thus, boosting your immunity.

2. Boost Concentration. A study on Attention Restoration Theory (ART) suggests that spending time in nature, or even just admiring it, can reduce mental fatigue and boost concentration. The natural light can help regulate your circadian rhythm, making you feel more alert and energised. This can help to increase productivity and focus throughout the day.

3. Puts Life into Perspective. The awe we feel from nature help put things in perspective and remind us of the bigger picture. All our problems seem small in an enormous universe, and it may help you gain clarity and insight into your life and priorities.

Challenges in life are inevitable. Hope provides a boost of motivation that positive change is coming and every problem has a solution. Without this optimism, people may grow stagnant and disconnect. Hope fuels your positive mindset and your creativity. Having hope is a choice that prioritises peace of mind and kindness in action. People with hope shines in negative situations, balancing realistic thinking, the desire for a brighter future and the energy to help create positive change.

Every sunrise gives you a new beginning for better things to come, and a hope for a brighter future. It is an opportunity to enjoy life in its simplest state, breathe freely and feels the embrace of the warmth of the sun rays. Let every sunrise adorn your mind with the power of hope.

Peter Ng

As some of you are aware, I am going for a heart's bypass operation on 5th February (approximately 8 days stay in the hospital), thus, celebrating my CNY in the hospital. No worries, my family and myself are in great spirit knowing that God is with us. He has blessed us with His love and peace. His Holy Spirit comfort us that all is well.

Not to miss the opportunity to bless you and your family for the lunar new year, I am posting this greeting in advance.

Here's blessing you and your loved ones a year of Abundance in - health, wealth, prosperity, career advancement, studies promotion, peace, love, and joy. May your heart's desires be fulfilled in the year. Hugs and Love - Peter & Family 😘🎋🎍🧧🧨🎆🐉

You simply cannot live a positive life with negative thoughts consistently dominating your mind.

Faults finders are one of the most unhappy people in the world. Instead of appreciating what they have, they focus on what they lacks. Instead of simply enjoying the people around them and accepting people for who they are, they constantly magnified their flaws. Instead of celebrating progression, they are always seeking perfection. Stop expecting people to live the life you want from them and of them, everyone has their own course of life. Just by typing the above sentences already made me tired. Imagine those negative thoughts fault-finders constantly have? No wonder they are always grouchy and tired, and unhappy.

Have a Powerhouse approach for your life and live to your potential:

- Identify your strengths and your unique talents which you know that you are able to do something better than most other people and something that come naturally to you.
- Overcoming limiting beliefs that are holding you back.
- Embracing growth and challenges. Live your life with an attitude of gratitude.
- Be your own Cheerleader. Keep telling yourself that you have what it takes to achieve what you want. And always be a beacon for others - be a blessing. Cheer on!
- Clarity of thoughts can only rise up when you accept yourself, acknowledging others for who you are, and stop ruminating about things and people that may not be favourable to you.

You can't live right if you don't think right! Be your own Powerhouse and live the life you deserve. Have an awesome 2024!

Love and Blessings
The Inspirer - Peter Ng

FABULOUS 2024!

With the new year, comes new strength and new opportunities. For me, the new year means:

Celebrate endings - think about the good things that have happened to you in the past year.

Learn from past mistakes. Let's be realistic, we are not perfect, henceforth, stop trying to live the perfect life because life is always in progression. Mistakes learnt are lessons that's growing us to another level.

Be determined to do things are good for you and your family. The new year brings you the opportunity to focus on the better things to come - have a positive expectation of better things to come. Always have a "more-than-better-than" attitude in your life.

Let's look forward to an awesome 2024!

Love & Blessings
Peter, Feliz, Jairus and Christabel

Saying "To do it afraid" is easier said than done. Fear is our normal response to perceived danger. It meant to help keep us safe. But sometimes fear can be our stumbling block to experiencing new opportunities (or new breakthroughs) and preventing us from achieving greater height.

We are in constant battle with fears. We face the fear of failure, the fear of not being able to perform or achieve, and the fear of not living up to expectations we place on ourselves or others place on us.

In order to overcome fear, we need someone who is stronger than our fears and/or a purpose higher than the fear. We need mentor or an understanding friend to constantly encourage us to keep moving forward or we need to set a purpose higher than the fear itself to overcome it. Then you can definitely do it afraid and receive the rewards for your efforts. And you will realize that it is an amazing journey of fun and joy in doing things that you are afraid.

The Inspirer
Peter Ng

Cluster B Personality Disorders - What's That?

This morning I had an interesting encounter with a man having Cluster B personality disorders. Before I start my story, let me explain what is Cluster B Personality Disorders. Basically, it is a person with a distorted view of themselves and having unrealistic expectations from others. The person may also have characteristics of anti-social personality disorders coupled with narcissistic personality disorder and borderline disorders. The individual has a fragile ego which explains the reason they need to 'talk down' others and allowing them to dismiss other people's feelings and thoughts. Associate with such a person in a long term will only result in being more despondent. Thus, we need to manage ourselves when we are in association with such personality.

This morning -
Bringing my daughter to her pre-school, we boarded the bus, which only have single seat available. I put her to a seat in front of me so that I can watch over her. At the next stop, the lady sitting beside her was alighting, I stand up planning to switch my seat beside my daughter. A man boarded the bus, came to the side of the available seat beside my daughter. I requested that he take my seat so that I can sit next to my daughter...

Man: I saw the seat first.
Me: I understand. I stand up to switch seat so that I can sit beside my daughter. Sir, you can take my seat.
Man: I am not desperate for your seat. I saw the seat here and I will take it!
Me: Okay. (Smiling to my daughter, I told her that she is independent to sit on her own)
Man: Unreasonable Idiot! (Still staring at me)
Man: (murmuring) I saw the seat and wanted to sn**ch my seat such unreasonable idiot.
Me: (trying to be cool, calm and compose... guess it is for the sake of my daughter... ha ha ha) But feeling uncomfortable for her, I carried her to sit on my lap with her school bag and my laptop bag.

In life, it is no point fighting battles that even if you win, you still lose the war, because it will affect my daughter and may even spoilt the emotions of my day. Did you ever win an argument but lose a relationship? Is it worth it? My mum always said, "Being right in life is truly over-rated."

I believe all of us have met such a person (no, I am not referring to the guy in the bus). A person who think they are always right. Most of the time, people with Cluster B personality disorders have a strong need for control or the need to feel superior (though the person actually feels inferior within but the need to control and to want to be seen as capable, he/she will cast doubts on others, thus, echoing to himself/herself, that he/she is right or better. Such a person may also seek perfection in all things and will tired people off with their shifting goal-post mentality be it at work, in relationships, or in decision-makings.

People who always think they are right suggest that they possess low emotional intelligence, thus, embroiled in endless arguments with them is likely frustrating, if not counterproductive. It is certainly aggravating to have to defend your own viewpoints and preferences in the face of continued opposition. However, if you show that you can be emotionally intelligent by controlling your own reactions, you can set a good example for this other person to follow in the future.

Steps to manage to maintain your positive emotions and maintaining your own mental health:

Do a reflection with yourself before you conclude the other person is at fault. People who constantly try to show that they are right will naturally make you feel defensive. But if you are to hear with an open-mind perhaps you are the one who needs to change.

Keep communication open. It is no fun to be with someone who constantly making you feel inadequate, in the long-run, you may constantly be second-guessing yourself if you are doing the right thing, which may cost you your self-esteem and self-confident. This is the reason why you need to keep the conflict focused on the main subject-matter, not letting it drifted to other issues and making it more personal. People who always want to be right tend to incorporate non-relevant information into every argument. Incidents from years ago, situations that have already resolved, and their own past experiences can be quick ammunition to launch into the current attack. Henceforth, staying ahead of this pattern will conserve your energy and avoid rehashing things that have no bearing on the present.

Stay Out of the Blame Game. Problems arise when you are involved in a heated debate with someone who is a pro at blaming others. Recognizing ahead of time that they will probably try to blame you, or avoid taking responsibility for their own words and actions, can remove some of the sting when it actually happens. Expect for the blame game to surface during these discussions but refused to play at all costs. Blaming someone who always needs to be right will not nudge them towards taking responsibility but will always end up opening opportunities for them to jump into the victim role, up the ante on emotionality, or turn the tables on you.

Lastly, don't take it personally. When engaging in a discussion with someone who is always right, it is inevitable to feel as if you are being personally attacked - and to wonder if that person is out to push your buttons. Trust me, when they are out to push your buttons and you reacted aggressively, they will make you feel that you are the aggressive one, as they are only pointing the "facts". Thus, to effectively respond in these situations is to recognise that people who always need to be right have likely developed that issue long before their interaction with you. It is not a personal attack, rather you should view it as a learned behaviour instead. Separating yourself from their learned behaviours can immediately give some relief to escalating emotions.

If you have a superior with Cluster B personality disorders, who has the tendency to find the smallest flaw to criticize and condemn as well as his/her inability to trust others just to accelerate and boost his/her ego, just remember the issue is them not your abilities. Do not allow him/her to lower your confident and doubt your potential.

Learning how to navigate conflict in relationships is essential to interpersonal health. Though an inherent need to be right all of the time can be attributed to many different underlying issues, understanding how to handle these interactions can be a huge factor in maintaining your own mental health.

Just to end my story... My daughter and myself alight in the next few stops, happily and joyfully, we sing and dance to her school. As for the guy in the bus, I believe he is still ruminating over the issue of the seat... :)

Your Inspirer
Peter Ng

Time is life! As each second passes our life is becoming shorter. Thus, time is life. Each moment on this earth is a gift, henceforth, it is important to enjoy and savour every moment and in every relationship. Do not let your yesterdays rob you of the joy which you can benefit today. Neither do you want to waste your time on negativity, frustrations, and perfection. Simply put, you cannot expect everyone and everything to always be what you want and the way you want, because life is perfect with imperfections. This is the reason why as human beings, we are constantly seeking improvements and progressions. Living in the moment is to learn and grow from the past, continuous learning and enriching oneself for the future, and simply enjoy each moment of today. Let's live our life with thankfulness, compassion, empathy, and love. Time is Life! 😘😍❤️

"RESISTANCE will tell you anything to keep you from doing your work. It will reason with you like a lawyer, or jam a nine millimeter pistol in your face like a stick-up man."
Steven Pressfield

If you've ever been frustrated by your inability to get started on an important (to you) project, you've met Resistance.

Author Steven Pressfield has done us all a favor by identifying and naming this mysterious force that keeps us from getting started and staying started.

We resist doing our work. Now, by "our work" I don't mean the work of our job, our employer, or anyone else's work. I mean the creative work inside us that we came to this Earth to express. The work that only we can do, the work that we have to do.

What do you want to write, paint, create, unite or empower that is nudging you from the inside? The more important it is to you, the stronger you will feel Resistance.

Every time you try to start, you will feel that there is something you need to do first - one more book to read, opinion to get, spare time to have. The excuses are endless and the net result is that you never get going. And Resistance smiles.

So to change this behavior and take charge of your life, realize that you are in a battle to the death with Resistance. Every day when you rise up to do your work, you will face Resistence. Slay that sucker, again and again!

That work you need to do (whatever that is nudging you)? I am waiting and cheering for you! Yes, you can do it!

Your success is my reward!

Peter Ng
The Inspirer

You are What You Speak

We have often heard the phrase "You are what you think" but according to my observations, I would rather said, "You are what you speak - of yourself, of others, and of your issues."

The outcome of your life is ultimately influenced by what begins in your mind, by what you believe. A single thought can have a viral effect and take over other aspects of your life, ultimately transforming who you are, for better or for worse.

But before it was a thought, it is what you speak of yourself, of people around you, and the issues or the circumstance surrounding you. Your words programs your mind, turning it into a thought, and thus, perceiving it into your belief.

If you keep saying that no one likes me, everyone despise me, or I cannot rely on anyone and no one can be trusted... Those words will program into your mind, converting it into a thought-pattern, and you will believe and perceived that people can't be trusted and no one likes you. Because your thought-pattern will show in your behavior, your attitude and even your words to other people and the circumstance, henceforth, people will want to avoid speaking or discussing issue with you - thus, creating a vicious cycle - and you confirm in your mind that no one likes you and they are not cooperative toward you. By so doing, you have set up a stronghold against people and easily angry or irritated when things does not go your way.

Similar to the story in Frozen, Elsa thought that her power is doing harm to others, she tried to isolate herself from the world, she speaks of fear and hurts. What she speaks, programs her mind, creating her beliefs and shown in her actions.

In Proverbs 21:23 - "Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity."

I particularly like Ephesians 4:29 which say, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."

Please be reminded of the quote in 1Peter 3:10, "Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech."

Although ships may be large and are driven by strong winds, but they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Our tongue is similar to the rudder, and it steers the directions of your life and your relationships with others. But you are the pilot or the captain of the ship, you can change the course of your life by changing what and how you speak.

Peter Ng

Yesterday, a client asked me why some people never seem to be able to be happy. My answer was simple - "Because they choose to give their joy away."

Are your thoughts bringing you happiness or miseries? The Law of Exposure states that the mind absorbs and reflects what it is exposed to the most. Basically, if we allow a thought into our minds, it will come out in our lives. The construction of your reality, not actual reality, will dictate how you respond and behave in the world.

You cannot control what has happened or what will happen, but you can control how you perceive an issue, a situation, or a relationship. Control is an illusion. We have heard that life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you respond. Some people are frustrated because they are trying to control the ten percent. They are not going to be happy unless everything goes their way and everyone treats them right. You cannot control the traffic. How your boss treats you or who gets more favour in your workplace. But what you can control is your response. That is where your power lies, not trying to control everything or everyone's else response. Do not let what you cannot control to sour your life. You need to change your approach to life and make a decision that no matter what comes my way, I am not going to get upset. Because you know that when you stopped giving your joy away, happiness will come knocking in your heart. It is not your circumstance that is keeping you from being happy. Rather it is your perception of the issue or the situation.

Let me be blunt here, life is way too short to let those interruptions and irritations to keep us from being happy. What are you allowing to upset you? Who or what are you giving your joy away? Is it really worth losing your joy because you could not find your keys or a co-worker having more favour? I wonder how many small issues we allowed to let it upset us that we lose sight of the bigger picture?

Keep your joy, keep your peace, and you will keep your strength to do bigger things in life.

The Inspirer
Peter Ng