گوشہ شعور The Enabling Corner

Page no 6:
-The writer and his wife Sandra started to see their son a unique individual and began to realize that his abilities will be unfold with the passage of time at his own pace and speed.

-They left their son alone to expose his hidden abilities and potentials according to his developmental stage but stupendously it happend at a rapid pace before the so called developmental stage.

-Writer and Sandra also worked on their motives and pursue for inner peace which had not been achieved through their child optimal behavior, acceptable in society.

-As they started work on their PERCEPTION, they began to realize a hell difference in their role as a parent.
-They started enjoying their parenting role to affirm their son AND let him face challengeof get redicule by others.
- Their son express withdrawal pain of being protective but they didn't helped him out.

-Over the period of time, he started shining 🌟 in his academic, sports and social life.
-He started bringing A report cards to home.
-Elected as leader of many athletic teams of the state.
- Groomed in an assertive personality which enabled him to relate with all kind of people in non threatening ways.

-THIS EXPERIENCE of writer and his wife Sandra was stupendous and helped them in bringing up of thier other children as well.
-Their experience made them aware about the stark difference in CHARACTER ETHICS and PERSONALITY ETHICS of SUCCESS.

So, SEARCH 🔍 YOUR OWN ❤️ WITH ALL DILIGENCE for out of it flow the issues of life.🙂

Page no 5

After world war 1, perception of success has been shifted from CHARACTER ETHICS to PERSONALITY ethics. Everything which improves human interaction were used to be considered as success like attitudes, behavior, skills, communication style etc.

- PERSONALITY ethics has two parts:
(A) Human and public relations techniques.
(B) Positive mental attitude (PMA).
This philosophy expressed in different ways, sometimes in inspiring way and sometime in the form of universal truths.
But,
Sometimes, it was manipulative and even deceptive, like intimidate others, use power looks and show interest in hobbies of other so you could get what you want out of them.
-Some of the literature of past 50 years acknowledged CHARACTER ETHICS but didn't recognize it as foundation and catalytic, it was just a lip service.
-The content was focusing on Quick fixes.

-The writer and his wife were also using Personality ethics subconsciously with their son.
-They were trying to get social attraction out of their son's optimal behavior but they were treated him as he is not capable of.
-When writer and his wife realized that their motive and character influencing their son and leading to conditional love which is lowering his self esteem.
-They decided to work on their PERCEPTION and tried to stand apart from him in order to sene his identity and worth.

We must integrate CHARACTER ETHICS in our own self to become effective in our interaction with others and try , not to use DECEPTIVE MESSAGE of personality ethics.

Character Ethics ✅
Deceptive message of personality ethics ❌

Page no 4

- When the writer was doing research and preparing presentations on perception and communication he was also engaged in reading literature, books, articles and essays on success, self improvement and self help that was publishing since 1976 in US.

- So, due to his vast knowledge, what successful people considered "key to success' was in his easy reach.

-As he was studying literature of 200 years earlier, he noticed a remarkable difference in content. Because of his pain and pain of other people having problems in their lives and relationship, he tend to feel more and more that the literature of past 50 years was very superficial.
-Superficial in a sense that it was just stuffed with how people are perceived by others, techniques and quick fixes.
-But these quick fixes temporarily resolved the problem and left the root cause to rotten.

-There was a clear contrast, when he reviewed all the literature of first 150 years which was solely filled with CHARACTER ETHICS which may include integrity, lack of pride, trustworthiness, humbleness and GOLDEN RULE (Treat others as you want yourself to be treated) etc.

-CHARACTER ETHICS could be called as FOUNDATION OF SUCCESS.

- Benjamin Franklin's autobiography is the example of Character ethics.

-But after world war l .. the perception of success shifted from CHARACTER ETHICS to PERSONALITY ETHICS.

CHAPTER: INSIDE OUT
A short summary of page no 1-3

In the first chapter, the writer is talking about his 25 years of experience in university, marriage life and business and how he came in contact with people who were successful in almost in every area of their life but they were questing for inner peace, and healthy relationships.

Writer shared some problems that people had shared with him.

-Some of them were successful in professional life, but they compromised on their personal life.
-Made a diet plan but unable to follow it for long.
-Some had problems in Management strategies that how he could win their employee's loyalty.
-A Father of a addicted teenage son, worried about how he could stop his son from taking drugs.
-Too much to do ,but not enough time.
- Seeing others getting successful make some people jealous.
- A couple with abated emotions and attraction towards each other.

These were the problems which can not be resolved by quick fixes.

THEN

- The writer narrates the story of his son, who was not good in academic and sports.
-Writer and his wife used to motivate their son by using phrases like,
-That's good, keep it up.
- Come on, you can do it.
-But nothing helped them.

After sometime, In the capacity of his office when writer was preparing a presentation on communication and perception. He realized that, his perception about their son was not in harmony with what they are doing to their son. Because what he is really communicated to his son with his actions and words was that " You are not capable"

So, We must work on our PERCEPTIONS because they govern our attitude towards life and our goals, how we behave and how we see the world 🌎.

Here we go..👇

So, Let's see what are the seven habits of highly effective people.

1: Be proactive
2: Begin with the end in mind
3: Put first things first
4:Think win win
5: Seek first to understand, then to be understood
6: Synergize
7: Sharpen the saw.

🔊🔊🔊
ANNOUNCEMENT
Hello everyone.
From now on,we will share a daily one page summary of "7 Habits of highly effective people" by Stephen R. Covey.

Stick around and stay in touch.

گوشہ شعور The Enabling Corner is Proud to Announce its first book reading club on "7 Habits of Highly Effective People " a best seeling by Stephen R. Covey's . 15 Serious and highly motivated individual will be selected for the activity.
Fill the Registration form if you :

1. You are passionate about reading self help/ Improvement content.
2. Can lead discussion on topics and give directions to the overall discusson.
Last Date to Register is : Saturday Augast 13 ,2022
Follow the link :
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfCE0cb2nb8OUvrS35dl9u9Gu8S_7COk51zG2FK6Gw7vayCFw/viewform?usp=sf_link