11/08/2020
I have a little book called 'A Sentence a Day' that I write in every night.
Last night the prompt was "If you had a superpower that you could use just for 1 day, what would it be?"
I chose Time Travel.
To be able to go back and spend a day with my mum. A whole day.
To ask all the questions I have had in the last 27 years. To hold her hand. To feel her arms around me.
Not that I have ever forgotten how it feels, but to actually feel it again would be so amazing.
There are so many things I didn't say, so many regrets, but this is all in the past, and given the opportunity to speak with her again I doubt I would bring all these things up. I'd like to think we would talk about the here and now, my present.
So I got to thinking about how much time we spend on regrets and missed opportunities when we should be focusing on right now.
Today is the only day we can truly influence.
Today's actions are tomorrow's memories. We won't be able to change anything that happened, but we can change how we choose to view it. We can even choose to change how we reacted to it the first time!
Missing my mum will never go away, but surely she would want me to be present, to be moving forward, not wondering about 'what ifs'.
Choose how you react, choose how you feel, choose to change your story if you want to. Remember, don't regret.
With love ###