Sonya Beyond Performance

28/08/2026

And there she is! It took a while to see a peek of her but she didn't disappoint. Underneath the moon was a cloud that looked like a woman, lying down, face turned towards the sky. She looked like a picture I painted many moons ago.

28/08/2026

Tonight, the moon rises full for the final time before we step across the threshold into spring.
This is the Year of the Fire Horse; a year associated with movement, freedom, courage and the refusal to stay where you have outgrown yourself.
This full moon is an invitation to ask:
What am I ready to stop carrying?
Beliefs that keep you stuck in service and sacrifice?
That your worth is measured by what you do for others.
That you have to be useful to be valuable.
That keeping the peace matters more than telling the truth.
That your dreams can wait.
That wanting more is selfish.
That choosing yourself means letting someone down.
Tonight, write down the stories about yourself that you are ready to leave behind.
At moonrise burn them & watch them rise up in smoke.
Then like a phoenix from the ashes recognise what you choose for yourself.

20/08/2026

Today I taught my first Youth Mental Health First Aid course.
I never feel nervous once I start. I love standing in front of a group. I love teaching, connecting, sharing ideas and watching people be moved.
I’ve been doing it for years, with adults, teenagers and children.
But before I start something new? That little voice shows up.
You're not enough
You don't know enough
You're not valuable in this work
You need more
How wild that after years of teaching, guiding & holding space I can still question myself like that.
One of the gifts of mindfulness is that now I notice. And instead of listening I move with love.
I love that little part of me. The girl who was a bit weird & didn't fit the mould so felt she was wrong. 😂
Maybe there will always be a part of me that thinks I need to be better. More qualified. More experienced. More ready.
That's okay.
I hear it. I acknowledge it. And then I do the thing anyway.
When I do, I realise it's my calling. To help people. To give people knowledge to help others. To love people.
I’m incredibly grateful for the scholarship from Te Pou that made it possible for me to train in Youth Mental Health First Aid and begin doing this work.
I'm grateful when someone lets me place my hands on them & I feel the tension melt. I'm grateful when someone trusts me with their broken parts.
So, it's okay that a part of me will never feel ready. I still need to do it anyway. A part of me will always say that I'm weak. Too soft. But the people who matter say that's my strength.
When I share my stories. I realise I'm just where I need to be. I couldn't be anywhere else.

19/08/2026

There is a quiet kind of freedom in saying no to the life you were told you should want, and yes to the life that makes you feel most alive.
Although I'm still learning this, I hope I've made sure my kids grow up doing it.
That started when I let them say no to school.
What could you say no to on the path to joy?

12/08/2026

This is a kid for whom competition was removed. He is good at stuff, and so the world wanted him to perform. He was sent to maths competitions, chess competitions, speech competitions.
One day he said to me, “Why can’t I just do something because I love it? Why do schools want to send me to competitions just because I’m good at things?”
It’s a fascinating question.
Because there can only be one winner. And if your kid is that person, fantastic. But not all people want to compete.
He loves knowing what the fastest speed climb is because he wants to know what’s possible. He loves watching more adept climbers because he can learn from the routes they take.
Competition isn’t necessary for learning. And sometimes, competition actually gets in the way of it.
A competition mindset can stop people from participating at all. It stops authors because they compare their first novel to Harry Potter. It stops business owners because they think they need to start out looking like an already established brand.
What if instead we let people be beginners?
What if being good at something didn’t automatically mean you needed to prove it?
He might want to compete one day. But it's not his 'why.' Is it yours?

30/07/2026

I used to go to Kirtan with . The first time I felt moved to tears. It was like medicine for the soul. I can't hold a note like him, or play an instrument - but I've often wanted to lead singing to heal others. I sing as part of my job. To honour culture, to guide young people, but I could never really lead that kind of healing. After feeling that breaking open though I needed to find out more... so I looked into church singing, chanting, and various forms. Here's the biology; singing vibrates the mylenated sheath around the vagus nerve, this causes our bodies & minds to release stress & relax. It also encourages the shorter inhale & long exhale that is synonymous with releasing tension. I love some songs best, but explore what suits you. Rebirth by is a winner, as is Stoney Creek by , Hum by & Landslide by
Sing them loud in the shower

26/07/2026

I'm teaching at Studio18 Health Club for the next 3 Mondays at 5pm. I hope to see some of you there for a chance to reconnect.

20/07/2026