28/04/2015
MARRIAGE IS NOT A POVERTY ALLEVIATION PROGRAM.
This may not be the best time for me to
write on this because of misinterpretations, but I can no longer resist the push.
"Husband Scarcity" has become one of
the challenges faced by many young girls
today. If you go to prayer houses,
majority of the intentions are prayer for a
life partner. And this calls for concern.
Casting our minds back to the time of our
mothers and grandmothers, was there
really much of a "Husband Scarcity"
problem? Or, maybe there were more
men than women then, or there was an
adequate corresponding numbers of both
genders. I don't think so. Maybe then,
the women had values and were
prepared to build a
home and not park into a built home.
Then, once a young man comes of age and
can at least feed himself and his wife, he
goes out in search of a wife and the
woman really appreciates him and helps
him to build a future. What am I really
trying to say? We created what we now
see as "Husband Scarcity" for ourselves.
Today, the reverse is the case. Ask an
average girl to define her dream husband;
you get things like "he has to be tall,
handsome, fair, and rich, own a house at
least, and be presentable" and then she
adds "God fearing" in order not to sound
so worldly. Then, check the number of
girls around you and the number of men
that meet that standard, and you will see
the problem. You hear girls say, "I cannot
suffer in my father's house and then go
and start suffering with a man." What a
wonderful dream! What if from the
beginning, you have everything you want
and there is no suffering, and later in the
marriage, the table turns around, then
comes suffering? Will you run away? No
one prays for suffering, but it is good to
start small and end big, than start big and
end small. The problem is that the
description majority of girls give of their
ideal man is virtually the same. When 50
girls want the same kind of man and the
man that fits what they want is just 1
man, and the man can only pick one.
Then, what becomes of 49 others? They
simply start lamenting of "Husband
Scarcity". Another irony of our time is
that it is hard, due to the face of our
economy to find a man who is of marriage
age who possesses all
those things these ladies want, legally
(except those involved in Internet fraud);
even the number of those in Internet
fraud is not enough to match all those
searching for already made husbands.
If you look around, majority of the ladies
of substance, of good value and virtue,
who are ready to build a home with a
man who has prospects, are married and
not complaining of husband scarcity. The
easiest way to find a husband now, is to
change your view of who a husband is. A
husband is that man God made and then
saw that it may be hard for him to really
actualize his purpose for making him,
without a help mate and then made the
woman and gave to him, and he felt
complete and fulfilled. MARRIAGE IS NOT
A POVERTY ALLEVIATION PROGRAM. It is
a mission of building the family of God
here on earth. For those who see
marriage as a way out of poverty, it is a
way into bo***ge. Women are HOME
BUILDERS, not HOME WARMERS... DON'T
CONFUSE A MAN'S PATH WITH HIS
DESTINY. Where he is today, may only be
a route to where God has destined him to
be tomorrow. Another truth is that YOU
MAY BE THE ONLY FAST MEANS TO THAT
HIS DESTINATION. Join in alleviating
"husband scarcity". PICK UP THE RIGHT
VALUES. I am not saying that you should
pick anyone that comes your way and
talks of marriage, not all men are husband
materials. What I am saying is that you
should stop setting your standard on
material acquisitions or
physical appearances. Look beyond the
physical. WHAT MAKES A MAN WHO HE
IS, IS NOT WHAT HE OWNS OR HOW HE
LOOKS, IT IS WHAT HE IS MADE UP OF.
And that which he is made of is, most
times, not seen with the physical eyes,
only its
effects can be seen. Marriage is a
permanent thing. Whatever is seen is
temporal and that which is not seen is
permanent. Relax and go to God in
prayer. God did not just make Eve for
making sake; He made her for Adam's
need to become complete and fulfilled. I wish you a happy married life.
