28/06/2025
*DEAR EDUCATORS,*
*Things Parents Wish They Could Tell You. Let me gist you.* đ€
As a parent and an educator, let us take note of the following:
*1. Our children are apples of our eyes no matter who they are.*
Every child has a story surrounding his/her birth, some are only sons, only daughters, only surviving child etc
Some were gotten after years of long wait and after near death experiences in the theater before bringing them forth.
*Please treat them like humans. Handle them with care.*
No parent will be happy to watch their precious children treated inhumanely. It hurts to the guts.
*2. Our Children lie to you because they are afraid of the pain you will inflict on them.*
No matter how much or how hard we discipline our children, we bear in mind that if we inflict injuries, we will bear the cost
We discipline them and flog them with love and not like animal and after which we draw them close again and explain why their actions were met with such reactions and why they must turn a new leaf.
*3. Our children sometimes don't get their homework done because they don't know how to answer them and we are too busy to begin to bother ourselves with what the teachers are meant to handle.*
So they may give excuses like:
"Sir, I didnât do my homework because my mummy traveled and locked my books inside her car."
Because if they tell you that they didn't understand it, you will yell at them and call them dumb.
Please, before giving them that homework, ensure that they understand it in class because some of us don't know what you send home too.
*4. Children make noise in class when they have nothing doing, when they see their teachers having discussions with other staff members or when the teacher is answering a call during classes.*
Our children know it when you don't have class control and so they capitalize on it to have their discussions when not engaged.
Please endeavor to maximize every second they spend with you in class.
Spend time to set rules and boundaries with your class. Discuss etiquettes and morals.
_Earn your children's respect and whether you are present or absent they will behave (I speak out of 31 years experience)_
*5. They watch the way you take corrections from your superiors, how you bad mouth your departmental heads, colleagues and parents.*
They hate it when you insult their parents anytime you get provoked by their actions.
_You earn respect when you show respect to your colleagues, parents and the children (respect is reciprocal)_
You think youâre muttering quietly in the class? That child heard all you said about your VP, Your head of school etc. How dare you demand respect if you don't show respect.
Children imitate what they see more than you can imagine.
Then you scold them for murmuring..."what did you say?"
*6. Many children come to school emotionally drained. What should you do as an educator? Can you even notice it? Or do you yell at them in class even more? Some even flog that child for not participating in class.*
"Why are you not concentrating in class? Leave my class and stay out until you are ready to learn." scolds the teacher
"I am teaching and you are not paying attention, go and kneel down there, or frog jump" yells the teacher with the stick in hand
You think being an educator is all about teaching, testing, marking notes and flogging.
Ever heard of *'loco parentis'*? This phrase is often used in legal, educational, and social contexts to describe a situation where an individual or organization assumes parental responsibilities for a child or young person.
An educator's role is to parent every child to the extent that they win their hearts.
You are not only to concentrate on the COGNITIVE Domain.
_"Please, before you result to yelling and flogging, have a talk with that child to know what the matter is" you will be surprised that these children can open up to you._
*7. Some schools are more reactive than proactive.*
Children don't like to be reminded of their mistakes every time. Doing that makes them repeat the offense, especially teenagers.
Because a child was caught taking his classmates biscuit or juice doesn't make him a thief.
But an inexperienced adult will tag the child thief and the child will become one and so do it to aggravate the adult.
Parents and educators should learn how to turn a negative experience into a teaching outcome.
_"I can't believe you took that from your friend, next time you are hungry and tempted to take something that doesn't belong to you, come to me first and I will ensure you get yours"_
_"I know you are a good boy/girl, and I believe you will not give in to this type of temptation again."_
Positive reinforcement and affirmations yield better results.
_*After all, how many of us are without sin?*_
*8. Punishment is for correcting wrong actions and not to harden children. Our children hate to be treated like animals and bullied by their teachers.*
It is true that not every complaint from our children is trueâor complete, but their are elements of truth in them.
"Mummy, the teacher punished me for nothing."
Oh, really?
"They forgot to mention they insulted a classmate first." (Did you take time out to hear from both party or you acted without investigation)
Or that they refused to do their classwork.
(Did you find out if the child understood what you taught in the first place?)
Because many of our educators have failed to understand that there are different learning styles for different children.....we are stuck with the old methods of teaching that benefit the audio learners.
_*What happens to our kinesthetic, visual and musical learners?*_
*Could it also be that the punishment wasn't explained out to the children and perhaps also not commensurate to the offence?*
That is why we ask educators to work with their learners to state the classroom rules and punishment at the beginning of the term.....
*SCENE:*
Teacher, you walked into the class and met your children making noise, what would you do next?
A. Ask them to rest their head on the table and flog them 10 strokes each on their backs
B. Ask them to bring out their workbooks and answer 5 pages of activities eating into their break.
_*Which of the punishment do you think will do the magic? Most teachers will choose (A) but a 21st century centred educator will choose (B)*_
*9. We see all the efforts you put into our children. We may not be able to repay you immediately because we know the appreciation that makes sense to many is cash gifts.*
We appreciate your laughter, warmth, concerns and prayers...you can't imagine how much we pray for the school community and do our best to ensure we pay the fees so that the school can run smoothly.
10. Children really know and appreciate teachers that know their subject. Don't leave yourself to textbook knowledge, master your subject and be ready to explore new techniques to teaching.
Some students see it a waste of time being in a class where all the teacher does is read out the textbook, copy long notes for them and ask them to memorize and pour them back during tests and exams verbatim.
What about learners that cant cram? like me.
Can't they paraphrase?
Be in charge of your teaching and learning outcome bearing in mind that the teacher is the lead learner in the class.
Make learning engaging, interactive and fun and you bet me, your children will do well in your subject.
*As your child steps back into school this Monday, Please:*
â Make them feel welcomed back.
â Let go of all the bad incidents of the last term just as God let's go of all your past wrongs.
â Love them unconditionally, remembering that you were once a child, a teenager.
â Correct them lovingly. They will make mistakes, they will act unbecoming, step on your toes.
â Don't brand them with negative tags. They are not really what they exhibit. It's just a phase that if well managed will yield great outcomes.
â Applaud their efforts no matter how little they are. Never concentrate on their shortcomings.
â Pray for them continuously because their win is your win and their failure yours.
*Letâs be partners, not competitors.*
Because at the end of the day, we both want the same thing: a child who excels.
Maryfavour Ondugbe Udokah
Early Literary Expert/ Reading Specialist
Special needs Children Therapist..
Proudly Educator.