Learn how to build your life

Wannan halittar ita ake kira da .
Abin mamaki gameda wannan halittar shi ne, idan ka yankata gida 2 misali, to bindin da ka yanken zai tsirar da wani sabon kai ya ci gaba da rayuwa, shi kuma daya kan da ka cire masa bindi zai tsirar da wani sabon kai a inda ka yanke din ya zamo Planeria mai kai biyu.
Idan za ka yi gunduwa-gunduwa da shi, to kowane gunduwa daya za ta tsirar da wani kai ta ci gaba da rayuwa. Binciken masana ya tabbatar da cewar kana iya gunduwa-gunduwa da Planeria har zuwa gunduwa 279, kuma kowane daya zai fitar da wani sabon kai ya rayu.
Planeria na cikin Kingdom Animalia.

Ta ya ya ke tinanin za a iya kashe wannan halittar kenan? 😅

🤔

***
When news got to my parents that I was living with a girl in school, hell was let loose.

How gossip mongers had managed to sniff out the information and began disseminating it was quite beyond my comprehension.

I was bombarded with incessant calls, mainly from my parents. They kept calling to confirm the authenticity of the rumor, or see if I would debunk it.

Mom was the first to call, and her tone was high and bitter.

"Hello, Emmanuel" She voiced immediately I had received the call ", what am I hearing? tell me it's a lie"

"What are you hearing, Mom?" I asked

"That you are now living with a girl on campus"

"Yes Mom, but..."

"The devil is a liar... was that how I raised you?"

"Mom, you need to hear me out first. The girl in question has some serious financial issues so she begged to stay with me for the mean time..."

"Don't she have parents?"

"Her parents couldn't meet up with her demands.."

"What about she staying with her female friends? why you? hope you both have not started..."

"Started what, Mom?"

"Started that thing!"

"Which thing?"

Just then my Dad snatched the phone from her and began his own ranting.

"Bia Emmanuel" Dad echoed "So you now have a wife and we didn't know?"

"Dad, she's not my wife..." I protested

"No wonder you always complain that the money I do send you is never enough, not knowing you're already married"

"Dad, am not married"

"So you have started doing that thing eh? Emmanuel'.. How many kids do you even have now?"

I GOT DISAPPOINTED ☹️ 😭

I woke up one morning, and I was just craving for Appo's bread. I had food at home but I didn't feel like eating it.
So I did what I needed to do, got up, and went to Appo. On getting there, I looked at the shelves, there was no bread, so I asked them, is there no bread today ? They said, no bread. I was left disappointed. 😞

As I was going back home, I realised that, If you're not able to differentiate what you need from what you want, you will end up being a slave to your appetite. Spending more resources on WANTS than NEEDS

I got home, prepared the available food, ate in peace, and I was very ok.😊

Someone graduated at the age of 22, but waited 5 years before securing a good job.
Someone became a CEO at 25, and died at 50.
While another became a CEO at 50, and lived to 90 years.
Someone is still single, while someone from his school group has become grandfather.
Obama retired at 55 & Trump started at 70.
Everyone in this world works based on their time zone.
People around you might seem ahead of you & some might seem to be behind you.
But everyone is running their own race, in their own time.
Do not envy them.
They are in their time zone, and you are in yours.
So, relax.
You're not late.
You're not early.
You are very much on time.

5 things about Tenge, the popular TikTok influencer who is just 11 years old 👇 the letter " N" in his name touched me.

T
Tender in age : He's an elementary class pupil, born in 2013. His real name is Saad Ssozi a.k.a Rango Tenge Tenge.
E
Entertainer : His Father, Kikomeko said Tenge was a funny character back in school, and is not surprised his son is a TikTok star.
N
Normal : Some people think he's not in good form, but his dad said "Tenge is very normal"
G
Growth : Over the past few months, his fan base has grown massively. He has over 7.1 million followers on TikTok and over 2 million on Instagram.
E
Entrepreneur : The Uganda kid is now a multi-millionaire. So many celebrities including Chris Brown, Davido, Speed, have linked up with him. He has a brand deal with Dubai-based Zamalest properties, a real estate and electronics company.

🤷 The mum once said, when Tenge was young , he even prayed to God to give him different eyes. But he never knew the eyes would make him a millionaire.
Every human is unique. Never look down on yourself.

You told your wife that you are going to work

But you went to her best friend's house whose husband is a soldier.

Her husband comes back and you hide under the bed.

The soldier sends his wife to the market while you are still hiding under the bed.

You heard him inviting a woman over from his phone.

That woman came.

After a while, his wife returns and says that her clothes are stained and she wants to change them.

Before the man opened the door.

He asks the woman to hide under the bed.

Now, that woman turns out to be your wife.

And you two are looking at each other like rabbits.

In school, we called it a reunion.

In social gatherings, we used to call it get together.

In mathematics, we used to call this the simultaneous equation.

In psychology, we used to call this "what goes around comes around."

In chemistry, we used to call this a chain reaction!

In economics, we used to call this demand and supply!

In physics, we used to call this nuclear fusion!

It’s a fictional story

UNIVERSITY OF ADULTERY
FINAL YEAR EXAMS
COURSE: MARRIAGEMATICS

Time: 1 HOUR 30 MINS

INSTRUCTIONS

ATTEMPT ALL QUESTIONS

ALL QUESTIONS CARRY EQUAL MARKS

1. You are a married man and you have dated somebody's wife for two years, busy spending on her like there is no tomorrow. Eventually she drops you and concentrates on her innocent husband. Calculate the percentage of time wasted. (20 marks)

2. You bought a phone for your friend's wife and she gave it to her husband. Using trigonometric identities, derive a general formula for this type of love. (20 marks)

3. For Men You're dating around 15 ladies and every lady is demanding for a Samsung Galaxy and an iPhone 6s

(a) Plot a graph of detoothers against prices of phones.
(15 marks)

(b) Use your graph to estimate your future poverty (5 marks)

(c) Plot the percentage shame against volume of apologies to your family members. (5 Marks)

4. You are whatsapping and facebooking other people's wives yet you don't want to see your wife on the social network. Calculate the Percentage Error in your thinking capacity. (20 marks)

5. You are a civil servant, your wife is a petty trader, your combined household income is less than k10, 000 Your daughter is using iPhone 6s and Samsung Galaxy worth k30, 000 each. Calculate the percentage of your Parental Negligence. (20 marks)

6. For ladies You're a married woman and you have dated 20 guys with hard labour, use the law of diminishing returns to calculate the substance that will be left for your husband to enjoy. (20 marks)

7. You can't give your wife k500 for a pot of soup, but you spend over k5000 in bars and restaurant.
Calculate the radius of your 'stupidity', take π=3.142 (20 marks)

8. You have been in the church and in your fellowship for years but your name is not in the book of LIFE because of the secret sin. Calculate the years you will spend in HELL? (30 marks)

Good Luck!